No drop & run at party: how to word it?

[LilyPlantLove]

Would love some help wording invite for DDs 4th birthday party.

It's going to be at a local park (open space, exits etc). She's our first and I don't know any parents personally who would for a 4-5 year old but we're inviting the whole class (so at the moment no idea of turnout, could be 5 could be 30!), I don't know most of the parents so I just want to make sure it's very clear that parents are to stay with their kids the whole time.

How do I word it kindly but explicitly?

Also, what might be a reasonable amount of time, 1 hr or 2? (We are inviting family etc so will be at the park longer than that but I wanted to give the school kids a specific window to be there so we can do the cake then)

Thank you!

I am trying to get on board with the party in the park bit, but I agree with this. It sounds like you are actually asking parents to do too much.

I like parties because I socialise and my child is engaged by the hosts (or who they hire). This feels like it has the potential for me to feel like a spare part at a family event. I would worry about seating too as I have a disability. It just is not relaxing.

I don't think you need to say it explicitly.
No parent in their right mind would drop and run for a four year old, especially if it's in a park. I have a four year old. I stay for every party and so does every other parent. It wouldn't occur to me to do anything else.

In terms of amount of time I would say 2 hours. 1 hour is far too short. I assume you're providing food and maybe a few games?

They wouldn't. It feels rude to commandeer a public space like this.

Lots of people hold all sorts of events - protests, park runs, dog meet-ups - in public parks. Allowing people to congregate outside is one of their purposes. If it's a big enough park, there will be plenty of room for everyone.

Absolutely. Especially when you add in the fold up tables and marquees the park keeper OP is erecting, it seems very entitled.

None of these are the same as taking over a play area though. 30 plus children in most playgrounds is an awful lot.

"Entitled" to what? Some share of public space for 2 hours of the year?

Next time I'm in our park, I'll tell the women's keep-fit group that they're "entitled" for taking over one corner of the park for 50 minutes on a weekly basis.

The OP has said it's in a "local park".

This thread is so weird! I've seen any number of birthday parties/anything partiesin the parks near me! And I've really envied those who are part of them!

They only take up a small area and they have a tent or gazebo and lots of folding chairs. Sometimes it's clearly a large extended family or group of friends, sometimes a whole bunch of little kids and parents.

I'm a grandma so not on the preschool mum's circuit, but even I know that there's nothing unusual about what OP 's planning, or at least not in my part of the world. And if I go into a London park ( I'm about an hour away) in spring or summer I can absolutely guarantee to see such a party.

Have a great time, @LilyPlantLove ! I'm sure you will!

OP is commandeering the prime space between the toilets and the playground, limiting the space for smaller groups to be there.

Unlike the womens’ keep fit class in their corner of the field.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/parenting/5087141-no-drop-run-at-party-how-to-word-it?reply=135691687&utm_campaign=reply&utm_medium=share

Yes, this is my experience too.

No skin in the game as my DC have winter birthdays but these gatherings really aren't that unusual and don't impinge hugely on other people's enjoyment of the park. I've never felt pushed out by a park party.

If I had the choice of having to stay with my kids in a park or in a dingy and loud village hall, I know what I'd prefer. For starters I'd be able to chat with other mums and hear myself speak!

Could you just put 'kids name plus mummy/daddy are invited to a picnic in the park for our kids bday' or if you know the parents name then include that?
Then 'we look forward to seeing you both then'
At the end? I'd say noone would assume drop and dash at a picnic in a public place at that age anyway.

@Snugglemonkey

30 plus children in most playgrounds is an awful lot.

This makes no sense. It's a public park. 30 children are entitled to use the space. On a sunny day play parks are full of far more than 30 children.

Surprised to read so many think park parties odd. They’re normal to me, my kids are nearly adults now, & not with a ‘Kit & Juno prefer hand whittled whatnots to plastic toys’ vibe, either. Hiring a hall costs a lot and the park is nice!

You know the park she's planning to go to, do you? Because in all my experience of passing by park parties I have never once seen them take over an area in such a way that others are disadvantaged. It doesn't sound like she's just going to the local rec.

Who knew play parks- a staple childhood experience, a place without class barriers, a public space open for all to enjoy in various ways- are now regarded by mumsnetters as the height of middle class twattery

I'm kind of sad that my entire family have late autumn and winter birthdays, now!

"commandeering the prime space" 😂

So pleased I came across this thread today. Going to take my sun lounger and towel down to the park at 6am tomorrow to beat all of the party hordes!

Some of the replies here are just A* MN material 😂
Anyway, clearly some people are unable to take in details, or refuse to do so to justify their outrage. I said it was a local park not a small park. It's a perfectly sizeable park. We won't be comandeering anything. We'll be hanging out for 90 mins as @CrispieCake said.

This kind of thing is very common where we are and yes we have a park keeper. What can I say, we're lucky and live in a nicely run town, we frequent this park regularly and get to know people in the community 🤷🏽‍♀️

(and before I get jumped on for being privileged (because I can already see the detour!), yes I am. I also grew up in poverty and had a rough childhood. I'm grateful for where I am now and I don't feel guilty about it)

Just want to give DD and her friends a nice moment in the park and some cake. You'd think I was organising a riot or something!

I Predict a Riot

Have a lovely party, @LilyPlantLove! and Happy Birthday to your daughter 🎂

It's perfectly normal for summer parties to be in the park where I am. Most parents would stay with kids this age but there's some good wording above. I can't believe people think a party in the park is problematic or grubby. As for dog owners being upset at park users daring to picnic in the park 🙄

OP I've only read your posts not the batshit replies but wanted to say the party, your neighbourhood and you sound absolutely fab and I hope everyone has a great time.

@LilyPlantLove

Have an awesome party.

And thanks for this thread. It's been classic MN entertainment. The hysteria from some has been 🤣🤣🤣