Waiting list for reception

[Mummyk13]

my daughter has attended my nursery since she was 3 months old attending all through Covid/lockdown and has made the most amazing bonds with her peers over the passed 3 and half years
I have worked at the nursery for 18 years working hours between 7-5:30 or 7:30-6
there is a primary school 0-4 miles on the door step of the nursery we live 1.8 miles 6 minute drive away
so we made 4 choice’sout of 6 for school application in January none of the schools have wrap around care like the school next to my work so we couldn’t make any other work

we fond out on Tuesday she did not get her 1st choice of school problem now all her friends are going to her 1st choice and she is the only one who hasn’t got her first choice

problem two one of the mums at the nursery was collecting her from me at the nursery to drop her and same collecting after and dropping her to me after school obviously now she can’t as she won’t be going to same school as her friend

I emailed our first option school on Wednesday morning explaining all this and how upset my daughter is and what I could do
the school actually called me they where so nice she said she had to call me as her heart was breaking reading the email and she wanted to put my mind at rest that this is just the first list and it changes a lot in first week she said there are only 15 children on the waiting list and my daughter isn’t at the bottom of it she said she dose not want to give me faulse hope but she said she thinks I’ll def get a place 🤞
she can’t tell me where I am
on the list untill May 1st she said she would call
me back once I can be told

question is what are the chances we will get a call for a space we have appealed but read that you never win reception appeals
but if there was no hope would the school had gone out there way the day after offer day to call me

There may be only 15 people on the waiting list but those names will be ranked according to the schools published admission criteria, and that will be the criteria used to allocate any available spaces that occur. So for example, if a family moving into the area with a child in Y4 is offered a place then their reception child will take precedence as a sibling even if they live further from the school than you do. All families living closer to the school will rank higher than you. If a parent who didn’t even originally choose the school expresses an interest they too will go onto the waiting list according to the published admission criteria. A child with a statement naming the school, or a LAC could be offered excepted places above PAN, which means that two spaces would have to be vacated before the waiting list moved. The school Secretary, well meaning as she appeared, will not have this detailed knowledge of the waiting list applicants.

I think you have a very small chance, but I wouldn’t bank on it. Make sure you accept the place offered so at least your child has a place in September whatever happens. Put yourself on the waiting list for any other acceptable schools. A formal appeal will not succeed on the reasons you have given.

Thanks guys i guess it’s just a waiting game 🤦‍♀️

@Mummyk13 you to check, you have accepted the offered school haven't you?

Yh I have accepted it as other why’s I could be given any school which would be even worse

The fact that your child has made so many bonds tells me that she will do well anywhere - she sounds like a lovely engaging personality. Who knows maybe she has a best friend joining the new school.

It is also worth considering how you will feel if she’s a place but not in the same class with her other friends. 1 in 3 chance.

I work in a reception class and some of the best friendships did not know each other before they joined our school. The friendships have blossomed since September. Some children who were close at nursery and who are close together are a total nightmare with paying attention and I imagine will be split for year 1!

Take heart. This is a great time to model a positive attitude about making the most of what comes your way.

If all else fails stay on the waiting list and leave it to fate.

If it's a 90 pupil intake...there is no guarantee she would be with her friends from nursery.

From your posts it sounds as though you are projecting your thoughts and feelings onto your child.
At 3 (my child turned 4 in July) I didn't tell my child where she was going to school until it came nearer the time. There is no need to make a huge deal out of it to them as it can stress them out.
If you are calm and reassuring and act like going to this school is just a normal thing that every 4 year old does (which it is for most if you don't home school) then they will feed from that...that there is nothing to worry about!

Hi I haven’t projected anything we had to tell her that she was not going to school with her nursery friends and that she would go to a new school and make new friends as all the children where asking if they where going to school together her reaction was very emotional and of course we have made it sound amazing to be starting big school we don’t have conversation about this in front off her
as you can image all the children are talking about going to school together and she is feeling left out and sad
we have had a number of observations sent over from her key worker where she role playing being sad about it and expressing her feelings

the school in question is 90 place free flow reception so they would still all be together

It is stressful not getting a place when you had your heart set on it, it happened to us once. We were near the top and got in before the visit days, it was a long time ago so I can’t remember exactly when. I do remember at least 11 children were admitted via the waiting list but it might have been more. Good luck!

Thank you sleekcat

So we are now 15/18 on the waiting list I have lost all hope

Oh that's tough - but you never know, things can still change, people move their kids about and 90 potential spaces are a lot...

But, I think you have to accept your daughter is going to a different school and prepare her accordingly. She's still very young and she will take her lead from you, if you are positive about it she will be positive too.

If it helps, me and my daughter turned up at her primary school on the first day knowing absolutely no-one and everyone else seemed to have come there from the same nursery! The staff work hard to get them all settled and encourage friendships and within a few weeks it was like she's always been part of the group. I stood in the playground looking as approachable as possible and I made sone fantastic friends too! Good luck!

Thanks @LaLaLouella
the school called us today and said we where 11/18 and there are a few who still haven’t accepted (why have a date to accept by if they don’t stand by it 😡)so I emailed administration and there saying we are 15/18 have no clue who I even listen to at this point

waiting lists do move at this time of year, but not always as quickly as you would like, and appelas happen in May and June, so there may be more movement after appeals.

I know of quite a numbe of people who got the place in July/August/ September, and even 6 weeks into term. (this last one is because if a child doesn't show up, they have to wait a certain number of weeks before they can declare the place free.)

So don't give up hope, but at some point you have to decide if you are going to let your daughter start at one school and then change.

The difference in the 11/18 and 15/18 may be because the school has heard form parents, or it may be that the LA has added more to the list. The list is normally held by the LA NOT the school.

Thanks @steppemum yh I thought that to but they both say out of 18 so dose not add up.

yeah me and my husband have said if we got offered when she is in reception we would move her she would know at least 20 of the children there so she wouldn’t be having to worry about making friends

thanks for your reply x

I really wish that pre schools would be more clear to parents that there is no automatic place at a primary school if you attend the pre school. Just before the day everyone got told their allocations there was a post from someone saying that at her 30 place primary there were 60 in pre school year at the same site, and another 120 who had put that school as first preference. Some of the 120 would have siblings or live closer to the school than those in the schools pre school. So being in a pre school can never override the oversubscribed criteria. I hope the waiting list does move for you but nothing you have written would win an appeal.

You got a place because there were places available, unlike your first choice.
You don't have grounds for an appeal, however heartbroken the school receptionist was that you didn't get a place (hard to believe).

🙄

I think you might need to accept your daughter is going to the other school. We were 6th place on the waiting list for one of our preferred schools in the May (90 place, 3 forms like you, 0.9 miles away), went up to 3rd, then down to 4th, and we were 1st on the list by August. I was so sure that we'd get a place that I bought their school uniform. Alas, people kept moving into the area and it's now May the following year and we never got a place. We ended up with our fourth choice of school, our child knew nobody but has made friends and settled well. Unfortunately I found this all an exercise in acceptance, and you might too. At age 4, they will not suffer the kind of emotional stress that you're trying to use as the basis of your appeal.

Hi @PollyPeep i am so sorry you had to go through this to it’s so stressful 😣

Yh I get what your saying but you have to have some hope and try all you can.

i hope your right as we have had daily observations from the nursery that suggest different and a report I guess you can’t really judge these relationships as we would normal years as Covid did have a massive impact on everyone and children are very switched on some times I think it easier to say there only young there move on a lot of children don’t that’s why then end up having to have social and emotional leads work with them.

@StarlightLime it’s a shame that we can’t believe that some people show compassion towards others I guess it’s this day and age.

we actually just had an appeal for our oldest and after reading all these refuse we actually stated we are under no illusion that we will win the appeal we just feel really strongly with our points that we wanted to have them heard we know that you only grante appeals if it meets one of the criterias one of the panelist then said that’s not true there the points we have to prove we follow if we feel strongly enough we can still grant an appeal on any grounds

I guess as long as we can say we tried everything we will never have what if’s

@Wannabeanomad thank you it’s so fistrating our borough have actually aloud children to start a whole year early this year to which is even more frustrating

guess all we can do is try

We have reached out to our local councillors and mps for our borough who have connected the admission team on our behalf most likely make no difference but they are fully Supporting us which is nice
i do think there needs to be a change in how the system works it’s 30 years out dated

the problem that you have is that for KS1 classes, ie under age 7, by law they cannot go above the class size limits unless there has been a breach of admissions policy, or a child has an EHCP.

The appeal panel is very limited on what they can do.

I have heard of really horrific cases where the appeal panel was not able to grant the appeal.
eg 3 children in 3 different schools (one had SEN and was in a aspecial school) and appealing for the youngest to be moved to the same school as another child, so that she could manage the school runs. refused.
Mother with advanced cancer, no car, and older kid in school 2 miles away, reception place then granted to child in school 1.5 miles in the opposite direction, grandparent doing school runs on the bus etc. refused

Your reasons are just not strong enough, however passionately you feel about your child.
And I am an ex teacher, and kids really, really do make new friends and settle into a new environment, it isn't the end of the world, in fact it can teach them resilience and that they can overcome a difficult situation, and thrive. One of the hardest lessons to learn as a parent is that we can't always make life happy for our kids, and actually allowing our kids to have sad feelings and work through them is an essential part of learning.

We have moved on the list to 7th now so moved 8 spaces forward which is good and no new children placed on the list

OP I am a TA. You REALLY don’t need to worry about the friendships. At that age they change constantly. Best friends seem to change on a weekly basis. She will very quickly make new friends- it won’t be an issue.