how much do you play with your toddlers?

[nappyaddict]

i hardly ever play with my ds. he's 20 months and basically plays on his own all day. i just find it so incredibly boring!! i prefer to take him out to soft play, swimming, the park, to the woods etc but must admit i rarely do this unless i am going with another mum and if we do go by ourselves going to the park/woods takes an hour tops so hardly entertains him for long. i do make cakes with him and paint but again not very often and again we'll probably only do that for half an hour.

My DD will be 3 in Aug - I work ft so, so only really have a couple of hrs in the evenings b4 bed and the weekends with her. I spend most of our time together cooking and cleaning, and I give her little jobs to "help", which she loves, we don't play much, but we talk a lot, read lots of stories, sing nursery rhymes galore and go for walks. I don't feel guilty about not playing as dd gets plenty of stimulus at nursery and has a good imagination, happy to play tea parties with her dolls and bears. Plus tbh, I can't be ar$ed! Saying this, DH is happy to roll around on the floor and play football with her!

You really need to have another child. I spend far less time 'playing' with DS (2) than I did with DD (4) - and I don't even feel bad! They love playing with/hitting each other.

Having said that, I do try to have a policy where if they ask me to come and look at something / read to them / play with the, then I will (within reason), but they don't ask me that often, or of they do, they usually only want me to play for 5 minutes, or to praise their lovely art work or whatever, and then they go back to themselves.

At the moment we do craft or playdoh or baking most days that there is no nursery, but much less in summer, when I just put them outside.

oh, but meant to say that the craft or whatever other activity we do usually takes about 30-40 minutes, so not much out of a whole day.

Personally I think it's important to be available,s o they can chat to you, bounce ideas off you, get your praise or encouragement, but you don't need to 'play' that much. I like the 10 mins of child led play idea. I read something about parents being like the 'mother ship' - toddlers need you to give them some proper attention for a little while, now and then, and that 'refuels' them to go and play by themselves again.

agree with astrophe - have more kids !
My dds play together loads, and don't ask me to join in much these days (they are nearly 4, and 5 yrs) but I admit I loved playing with them as toddlers. I always got all my housework done too though, so I wasn't at their beck and call, and always said I'll play with you when I've finished this etc.

Now they are more independent I do miss sometimes how much they used to want me !
Ds is 10 mo, and I take every opportunity to get down on the floor and play with him. Its kind of nice disappearing into their world for a while if you can let yourself.

I don't really play with Tom. He has the attention span of a goldfish! In fact, I was playing with his new bricks at the in-laws and he broke my house I made! I was . Well, I was a little gutted .

It's kinda like i've lost the ability to play. I played lego, my little pony, care bears with my younger brother all the time when we were growing up. It's almost like it's an irritation now.

Reading books is a no no, as he has a tendancy to try and rip the pages or just gets annoyed at having to sit. My parents, DF and in-laws have no problem playing with him though.

I do think he gets annoyed when he sees me sat on the computer. It's not like I ignore him though. He loves bubbles, me singing to him and balloons. I did buy him some crayons and paper. Thats ok doing that together until he gets annoyed and throws the crayons!

Not attemped painting or making cakes yet though. Tom will happily entertain himself most of the time. He likes playing with his cuddlies in his cot, which can be handy before and after naps!

I'm not very good at playing with things (fairy castles, dolls houses, Noah's Ark etc) Seem to lack the imagination

Like doing things like drawing, colouring-in, play-doh (painting is for nursery!) and reading. Can handle lego, just about

Both Dds LOVE hide-and-seek, which in our flat is a challenge to say the least. But I am up for it anytime

Always feel I should play with them more, though... but then they've got each other and get on great most of the time. And I'm not a very good dog, apparently (current craze )

the more pregnant i get, the more i play

games involve lying with mummy in bed/on the sofa/on the floor

we do a lot of song singing - dd (20m) has all the actions to miss polly had a dolly, wind the bobbin up, when all the cows are sleeping etc etc

peek a boo with a soft toy, the wibble wobble crash game (she stands up and then falls over on our bed) and tickling feature highly in our repertoire too

not exactly play but she's also very good at emptying and loading the washing machine and this takes her AGES so good to leave her to do that while I tidy round her

and she ADORES watching her big brother (almost 5) playing with his friends.

i had 3 in 2 and a half years.

they play together.

theres method in my madness

bexie - ds hates me reading to him too!! after 2 pages he grabs the book off me and "reads" it to himself.

I play with him, and he'll 'play' with me. This involves dusting, washing, dog walking, gardening, cooking, etc. He thinks he's playing. When i play with him, I am usually helping with things he cannot set up alone. i start him off, he gets on with the game e.g. the farm, and occasionally i get involved if he's stuck or getting frustrated. I dont find it boring, because i am doing every day things i need and want to do while he is playing. Sometimes he helps other times he is involved in his own game. DS is 22months.

I tend to find the chat while children play pretty dull. Playgroup drives me nuts. I last an hour at most. i cannot standdrinking tea and chatting. I go so my DS socialises! i like the people, just remaining in a room for two hours is not my thing i guess. I'd rather be outside.

I hardly play with my DD as i find it really boring and when i do play she gets fed up so easily and wants to do something else so it puts me off anyway. So i tend to let her get on and entertain herslf. Since my DS has come along i do tend to play with her a bit more as i sometimes feel guilty im not spending enough time with her. She starts nursery in september so she will be able to play all the time then.

With DS1 we did lots of groups in the mornings (mother and toddlers, tumbletots (exercise/gymnastics class), sing and sign, soft play centre), and then visited friends / went out with friends in the afternoons. We were so busy, that an afternoon in by ourselves felt like a nice rest!

Now we have DS2 (21m), DS1 is in pre-school 5 mornings per week. That's a great place, and he gets to do lots of arty things there. DS1 and I don't do any groups, but he seems fine. We do something most afternoons though, whether it's a trip to the park, duck pond, soft play, aquarium, playing out on the street etc. In the mornings we go shopping, or come home after dropping DS1 to p/s and do housework. He has a toy hoover, brush & mop, so we do that sort of thing 'together'. Then he's usually around me while I do other things like washing, or putting clothes away. I quite often spend a couple of hours sorting out the boys bedroom whilst DS2 plays happily by himself in the same room.

I don't really spend any time playing cars or trains with him like I did with DS1, but DS1 plays with him, so I don't worry about that. I will join in if it's something they need help with (marble run), or supervision with to stop them fighting (intricate farm set). If it's something like building blocks, or duplo, I try to leave them to it.

If you're feeling bad about it, try the 10 minutes thing. That seems like a really good idea. Or just spend 10 minutes tidying up one activity & encouraging him to move onto the next one.

It gets easier as they're older / you have more children. Now DS1 is nearly 4, he quite often goes to play at a friends house by himself! If I can time DS2's nap to coincide with this it's bliss I can't wait until the summer, as I'm hoping that this year they'll be old enough to play out in the garden together by themselves.

I like reading stories to DD1 but the playing at being mummies and playing shops drives me to despair. Spend most of the time playing with DD2 to stop her trashing DD1's complicated games. Find the baby strangely fascinating. Poor DD1.

I make sure I always talk to DD1 and listen to what she saying, if you do that you don't need to be on your knees being a horsey 24/7 (or indeed ever) IMO. Well, that's my excuse anyway.

I play with DD quite a bit when we're on our own but as soon as anyone else is around I take a break and leave them to it 'cos it gets sooo boring day in day out. I try to have a bit of structure to the week with toddler groups and other activities so that it breaks things up a bit. When I'm fed up with toys and games I just take her round the house doing housework like bed changing, sorting the recycling and cleaning the rabbits out! She always finds something to entertain herself with like diving on the pillows or bashing cardboard boxes together, although the jobs always take twice as long as I have to clear up her mess afterwards too. It does help that I have babyproofed most of the house though, would be hard work otherwise.

I do lots of "activities" with DS - playdough, painting, sticking etc. and we also go to a group or other out of the house thing every day, because I do find playing quite wearing. But by breaking it up with other activities, it can be quite fun.

I always join in but try not to direct. The exception to this is the Brio train track, where I work like a dervish to get a good track circuit laid before DS trashes it. Not quite sure of the point of this but it seems the right thing to do.

DS is getting more single minded and focused on his games as he gets older (2.5 now) and am finding it harder to join in because I'm less needed. Doesn't seem to mean I can often go away and do my own thing though.

Am delighted that the obessions of the past few months seem to be on the wane. Especially "Hide the potato" (on the doormat. ALWAYS) and "poor dolly has fallen on the floor. Oh no pick her up and Oh no she's fallen down again" Soooo tired....

My little man is quite demanding so I usually have to play with him to get some peace. Not sure if that is the right thing to do either as I think he needs to play on his own to but he gets bored after a few mins and is then over to me.

I bring him to classes, for walks, read, sing to him. I try not to put the tele on too much so maybe a half hour during the day if I am desperate and then have the radio on with nursery tunes, or charlie and lola stories or something.

I am hoping his brothers/sisters which are on the way will take over the role of playmate soon.