Am I a bad mother if I put my toddler in non width tailored shoes?

[nct73]

Just call me Imelda! I love shoes, I love sales, I love ebay. There are so many cute shoes and boots out there for little girls - Zara, Gap, Next, Mothercare ... I only put her in new or almost new shoes which are often being sold by other Imeldas who were tempted by cute shoes then their DD grew too fast to wear or had fat/thin feet. However I look around at groups we go to and they all seem to be in proper Clarks or Startrite etc which have a width size as part of the shoe size. How essential is this & up to what age? DD is 15 months and just about walking on own after months of cruising & using a walker/zimmer thing. I feel I am being a terrible mother feeding my love of shoes while destroying DD's feet.

hi nct, i too love shoes esp cute little girly ones but i really do think its v important at your dds v young age and stage of walking that she has sensible properly fitted shoes. maybe save some nonfitted special ones for special occasions like parties or til she is older- say 3 or 4. hth

Errm, how to put this. DEFINITELY NOT a terrible mother BUT...Shoes shouldn't really be put on baby until their feet have uncurled and they are up & starting to walk. even then barefoot as much as possible. Properly fitting footwear is very important, as is properly constructed footwear to help support those (lots of) tiny bones and ligaments of DDs feet as they learn to hold her weight. Startrites are V good as they often have a bit stronger construction to help hold mobile joints in a good position for walking. Now is the time to make an investment in your childs feet. Please buy one good pair. LECTURE OVER, doubt you've done any damage at all as long as the footwear you've bought has plenty of room for her chubby little feet. Don't think theres anyone alive who doesn't coo at a tiny pair of shoes. If your out and shes in a buggy, the cutie ones are fine.

I thought they were supposed to be in properly measured shoes.

Definitely think it is very important to have properly fitted shoes for young children. Sorry!

Don't think that children's shoe shops will even fit them for shoes until they can show they can walk OK. But once she is walking properly at least get her feet measured. I think that if she has "normal" size feet - which is about "F" width - then you are probably not going to hurt her feet.
Personally I can't take the risk - but both of mine have very narrow feet and need properly fitted shoes - and I seem to be totally unable myself to work out if a pair fit or not.
Also dd is very pidgeon toes and the consultant advised I ensured her shoes were always prroperly fitted.

The bones in the foot are still very soft when the children are little so it is very important to have your DD's shoes fitted properly for the first few years. It may be that she has very wide or very narrow feet and so off-the-peg shoes just won't fit.

My DS2 would never fit in shoes other than width fitted ones as he is a size H and he would need to go several sizes up in length to get the right width and obviously he is going to fall over a lot in shoes that long (even though he is 4 now).

It is not advisable to put children in second hand shoes either since the other child's foot will have left an imprint in them which won't match your DD's even if they are the same size. I am all for getting 2nd hand when possible but not for shoes.

Sorry.

Clarks aren't that bad are they? I thought some of the shoes were quite cute and chances are she won't be in them for more than a couple of months before she has to have new ones so you won't be bored with them for long.

Clarks have some lovely shoes & they DO measure properly. Don't forget, once she starts bombing about the place rather then toddling, her shoes will be scuffed & scratched beyond all recognition in a week! Do take her for fitting - most Clarks shops will take her picture too with her 1st proper pair of shoes.

Clarks do not measure properly, they try to fit feet into shoes that they have not the other way around.

Go to an independent shoe shop, they are much better than Clarks imo, there are lovely shoes out there from umi, geox, elefanten and so on that they're worth looking for.

IME - most show fitters are rubbish and people who get the shoes measured "properly" buy the wrong size becasue of it. They are congratulating themselves that they are doing the right thing.

I judge by wheterh the shoes fit - how much space in front of the tow, are they too tight too loose etc. Only good shoe fitter I met measured DS as a 23 and then checked the shoes he was wearing (only a size 20) and said "actually those are fine and will last him a good while longer".

Agree that you need to be very careful about putting hard shoes on childrne too early. Stick to very very soft shoes until she's walking really well. Even then I was careful to get soft'ish shoes.

tow?! toe!

Poor MrsP, our local Clarks uses boards & tape measures and has a gait pad that the child stands on to see how weight is distributed in standing. Thought they had them everywhere. Elefanten are excellent, also babybottes, both of which have been used in my line of work as a medical prescription to children with gait/foot problems - don't let that put anyone off, they are not "special" shoes, quite the reverse. They are just very well made, well structured and gorgeous.

I have been to about 20 branches of clarks altogether and I have never been satisfied with any visit.

I have been to stores with the equipment you describe and they are not good at fitting shoes, the training they receive is pitiful at best and dangerous at worst.

Please don't call me poor mrsP because I'm not to be pitied. I actually care about my children's feet which is why i would never go to one of those stores again.

oh our local clarks have those gadgety machine thingies. Just don't use them.

The width tailoring is bollox, nobody measures width outside the UK. You just have to try on different styles and see what fits best. My dn has ridiculously narrow feet apparently yet has no problem with non width tailored continental shoes. sure there are some styles that are better than others for particular shaped feet, but that's it.

I agree that Clarks is rubbish, when we went they measured DD's feet as 2 sizes smaller than the shoes she was wearing at the time.

Sorry, there was me thinking this was a discussion, you know, somewhere where people of slightly differing opinions may swap them and share experiences. obviously you are right and I am wrong. I was not pitying you, I was sympathysing that you had a bad experience whilst trying to to the best for your children. Won't sympathise again.

Where I live there are no "proper" shoefitters, indeed no shoefitters at all unless you have a referral to an orthopaedist. Until recently the only way to do it was measure DC's foot on a stiff piece of card and take said piece of card to shop and put in shoes to see if it fitted (DC too small for reliable cooperation other than "Yes these pink-and-gold sparkly glittery ones with flashing lights are a perfect fit mummy"). And forget width fittings.
Recently in some chain stores there are foot length measures so I kind of hope that if I find the gauge supplied by the same manufacturer as the shoe hopefully they will fit.
Bought a pair of Elefanten in this way a couple of weeks ago, but saw no ref to width fittings and wouldn't know what to do with one if I had, as nothing to measure it with.

I really don't think it's essential that children wear width measured shoes. As long as you take the time to find shoes their feet fit into comfortably they should be fine. DSs sometimes have off-the-peg shoes and I just make sure they fit properly before i buy them. I do get them Clarkes for school though because they're in them all day.

Reading all this it obviously depends on individual shoe shops whether you get a good fit or not. Our local shop is very good - stocks a wide range of continental makes as well as Startrite. THey measure the width so they can select the right make of shoe for the individual child - otherwise you would need to try on many more shoes to get one that fits.

The gadgety machine things are for much older children - ds is 5 and has only recently been able to use them for measurement.

I've never had a problem in Clarks - in various branches. Never been told to go up a size unnecessarily - they've even checked dd's feet in her ridiculous Leli Kelly boots!

I've had the dcs in Startrite before and wasn't v impressed with the quality tbh.

It's only now dd is nearly 3 that I'm letting her in daft sparkly things rather than the more staid CLarks offerings.

Having said that - the current Clarks range for girls is rather yummy - just had a look at their website.

I've never seen the machine being used (not just on my DS) of course they might whip it out at the dead of night for special custmers. I can go to three different shoe shops locally and get DS measured as three different sizes. I have no idea which one of them (if any) is doing it properly.

i'm sorry to all clarks fans, but i think it is total bollocks. when i was a kid, my mum took me to clarks and had all the measurements and all that jazz, but now it seems like you go in, some spotty arsed 16 year old comes out in a mood cos your kid's too small to go in the electric shoe machine thing, then they make some measurement of types, then go in the back and say, "yeah, well these are the only ones we got so you'll have to have these ones" and when you question the size is different to the "measurement" you get "yeah well, if you go up a size you can have a different width" or some similar rubbish.
WTF is that all about?????
i do think that clarks make good shoes, but to be honest, as long as kids wear sensible shoes which are not too tight or sliding off them, I can't really see what the harm is.

agree with haggis that if your DD happens to have "normal" feet then you're probably ok. You could get her measured to see.

my DD is a G/H fitting depending on the cut of the shoe, so we have no choice but to get startrites.

I was pleasantly surprised at how pretty the startrites were though. I had wide feet when I was small, and the only shoes I could fit into were kind of orthopedic looking.

you and I can link arms ready for the attack bonnie

What pisses me off about clarks is that they ALWAYS ask me what size shoe she is in now before telling me what size she measures. Why would you need to know that if you're confident of giving me an accurate shoe size by measuring? Unless of course you're going to tell me she's just half a size bigger than she's currently wearing and needs new shoes.

Every time I'm told my dcs are half a size bigger the CLarks fitter tells me not to get new shoes until they're whole size bigger, because they're designed to have that growth room. The fitters I see can't be on commission because both ds an dd haven't had new shoes since last September and I've been to Clarks faithfully every 8 weeks.

I'm getting to the stage where I want them in new shoes because they're looking so minging.

But I'm told they don't need them!

You should all come to my local Clarks and save a fortune