To get cameras for one DS is home alone?

[Twinkiebinkieseven]

Hi all,

My DS is 11 and will be in secondary school in September. 2 days a week he'll be home before I am for about 2 hours. I'm thinking of whether I should get a video doorbell and internal camera for a bit of peace of mind. It would be great to hear from anyone who had them for this reason or, anyone who would have a reason to decide against it?

No. It' s not nice to be spied on. I think getting chicken used to the idea that surveillance cameras are normal is not a good idea.
Could you just ask him to message you when he gets home?

I love mt ring door bell. The youngest has a habit of not going to school, so being able to see him leave gives me peace of mind whilst I’m at work! I say go for it :)

A ring doorbell would be a good idea, but I don't think you need cameras inside the house.

I would not like someone to be watching me on a camera like that, even if it was my mum! Honestly, I don’t think you need it. You can message or call him? My son was also in this situation and I he was fine, as I’m sure are many others.

No, I think that's giving you a false sense of security. Two hours is a long time to be regularly alone and it's more likely he'll come to harm online than by a random person breaking into your house.

Absolutely not a camera in the house. Seriously, What's the world coming to? Everyone is entitled to privacy within their own home, and spying on your son is a dreadful thing to do.

Have a ring doorbell if you must, if you're going to worry yourself silly that you don't know whether he's home or not.
But better still, trust your son. I assume he has a phone if there's an emergency.

I have no issue with anonymous cameras on city streets, but within houses so you can watch family members when you're not there? Really really grim.

I genuinely find it really disturbing, all the tracking, cameras in houses etc that young people are being brought up to think of as normal.

Privacy is important. No-one who can identify us has the right to know what we're doing when we think we're in a private space.

There've been Mumsnetters husbands reported to be tracking and filming their wives movements while the husbands were at work. The vast majority of us were horrified at that. But even then there were some people who thought that was fine. Which is scary.

I know someone who has this set up, imo it’s a bit weird. The children are aware of them etc etc, but they seem to be less independent because mum is still parenting them through the camera. So a bit counter intuitive in trying to raise independent human beings.
agree with @saraclara post in it seems intrusive on personal privacy.

People have left children home alone for thousands of years.

You don't need cameras inside of your home.

Chicken famously object to being spied on.

If you really think that you need to set up cameras to spy on your son then you’ve got more serious problems than wondering about him being safe at home.

Thanks all. Probably overthinking it. It really isn't about spying. He's pretty mature for his aget It's just wanting to know he got home safely. He has a phone so actually a text message is good enough as per suggestion above.

I wonder then if a ring doorbell might be a good option so that if he's ever locked out and doesn't have his phone or it's dead, he has a way of letting me know. 🤔

Can't he go to a neighbour if he's locked out and his phone is dead?

Or don't you have those kinds of neighbours?

Did you ever get your chicken used to the idea that surveillance cameras are not normal?

Was your chicken in agreement?

What about if a fox approached the coup?

A Ring doorbell is a good idea but as for indoor cameras absolutely not. What on earth do you think he’s going to get up to that you feel the need to spy on him? Any problems and he can ring you - no spying needed!

😁

@penjil we have lovely neighbours, they just might not be in as most work or out doing school runs and he's a nightmare for losing things as he has ADHD so it's just about planning if he forgets to charge his phone or loses his key. Back in my day, we could always go to the phone box and make a reverse call so that's my main thought.

@JenniferJupiterVenusandMars it's not about spying. He has ADHD which means he's always losing things so I'm thinking about what happens of he loses his key or phone or forgets to charge it and needs to contact me. As above, back in my day we could always run to a phone box and call someone if we got stuck.

Just get a key safe. They're not at all expensive, and that way he (and any of you) have access to spare key if needed.

My kids didn't even have phones, let alone spying technology. Let your kid grow up and take those first steps to independence without constant monitoring.

@Twinkiebinkieseven Ring doorbell would mean you could see him come home. From this moment on when you are with him get him to unlock the front door, remove the key immediately, step inside the house and put it in the back of the door, close the door and lock it, only then do they turn off the alarm.

For not losing the key, either a keyring with a pull out cord thing that you sew or attach to his school bag, or long piece of 1cm elastic sewn in does the same job.

Put a list up in the house now of things he needs to remember to do so he gets in the habit, I made a list, laminated it and then they ticked it off every day, everything from open your curtains, charge your phone etc. This gets them into a routine of doing things daily and the ticking means you can both see if he has missed something.

@saraclara he's very prone to losing things because he has ADHD. I have no worries leaving him, I often do if I nip to the shops, just planning for if he ever loses his key and phone or doesn't charge it. I want him to get home. If we have a ring doorbell that means he can give me a call from the bell and I get the assurance that he's actually at home.

Saw your other note about a key safe. That's a fab idea and hadn't even considered that. Thank you.

Ducks on the other hand arr fine with it 😁

Just pirate ducks?

I would have HATED being watched like this by my mum when I was younger. Terrible idea, and it is being spied on, no 2 ways about it.

Get him to text you when he gets in.