Are they being PFB, or is DS terrible ?

[cmotdibbler]

My DS (22 months)is a total whirlwind - constantly active, talking, signing, finding out what happens when... Everything in our sitting room etc is either non breakable or above child height.
Friends little girl is 4 months younger. She never fiddles with anything, just sits on the floor quietly, and so their house has a big glass vase on the hearth, stuff on all low surfaces, PS3 out on the side etc.

This weekend they were staying with us - DS gets a bit frustrated that she just doesn't do anything (or speak at all)and did hit her with a book and a toy at various points - not hard, and she wasn't at all upset. There was the usual amount of toy grabbing on both sides.

Friend has said to DH last night 'Is DS always that aggressive ?' and that his wife is now very stressed that her DD gets hit like that at nursery etc.

Now I feel a bit worried that he is - although he is never labelled as such at nursery and is actually commented on as playing really well with the other children.

Is it just the 4 month gap that makes him seem like this ? Or their personality differences ?

Or should I start saving for the ASBO now ?

bit that is

However being active does not mean that a child is violent. My son as a toddler never hit anyone, but he never sat still.

Some adults are active and some adults are very sedentary.

That's sort of what I meantin my second post Reallytired!

Both children in the original post sound perfectly normal in their own ways. However, I would be aghast at a child hitting another child with anything (no matter if they were upset or not) and not being told very firmly indeed that that was not at all okay. It sounds like the hitting wasn't remarked on as anything unusual by the OP and not something that her son was scolded for (even a mild scolding is worth it, I think). If I was the parent of the little girl, this is what I would be concerned about - perhaps this is what they meant when they said 'is he always aggressive?'. Maybe they expected you to react to it a bit more strongly. If I've read it wrongly, I apologise.

He was told off - very firmly-, and he apologised on each occasion. I would never let that sort of behaviour go unremarked both for his sake in the future, and for the injured party.