When did your child potty train?

[Usingthings]

I have tried a few times now but he doesn’t seem ready. What I’m wondering is how I know when he’s ready - will he just ask to use the toilet or potty?

He has been in regular underpants and trousers for a while now. So it isn’t that he isn’t feeling when he’s wet. I keep reading disposable nappies are the reason so many children train later so I thought pants would be the key but evidently not!

@Lizzieregina I’m torn between being led by him but then also worried he might not instigate using the potty and end up in nappies for a long time.

@PremiumPork ds doesn’t seem bothered by wet or dirty pants which worries me a bit.

Mine were both jut before 3 and both reliably dry within 48 hours or so, so it really was a non event.

I found that once they could 'wee on demand' then it was easy. Just a case of regularly taking them and 'keeping them empty' so to speak. Poo took a little longer, which I found surprising but seems common, both completely done & dusted with everything in about 3 weeks.

He was 2 in February and we waited until I was off during Easter holidays and did it then.

He did need reminding in the early days, which many people will say means he was not "trained" or "ready", but I just see that as a step towards complete independence and I preferred to do that step than sticking with nappies.

I would say it took probably 3 months before he was reliably dry day and night and I don't think the process would have been much different with him if we had waited those 3 months.

@Usingthings it’s tough I know. When we tried to instigate it DS nearly drove us both mad! And we were constantly asking and reminding him “do you have to go” “how about now”.

We didn’t push anything after the failed attempt, but we did have lots of potty books that we read, the potty was always in the bathroom and we bought fancy undies that were ready to go.

When DS told me he wanted to wear his big boy underwear, I rushed off to get them right away 😂 didn’t want to miss the opportunity!

DD had a bit of itchy/soreness and was complaining, and I pointed out that her nappy was causing it and if she wore her Barbie knickers, it’d go away, so she said ok and that was it!

I know some of my younger friends just let their kids run around outside in the garden with nothing on and feed them lots of fluids, and it has worked really well for them, but we have nice weather from May onwards. Probably not an option in the UK at the moment!

DD was nearly 3 and got it straight away. Two accidents in two days and then never again. No arguments, no tears, absolutely textbook. She wasn't dry in the night until she was 6 but even that wasn't a problem once she was ready.

DS was just over 3 when he started, he absolutely detested it and still never wants to go at 5.5. He rarely has an accident because he can hold it for hours and hours! But he's better than he was about it, mostly. Still in pullups at night.

They do all get there eventually. I never thought DS would!

As soon as they turned two. Was fairly straightforward and all dry at night fairly quickly too.

He just wet himself about five minutes after weeing on the potty.

For us that was pretty normal for the early days. The first hour we did without a nappy she weed about 10 times. It wasn't far off continuous. Once we were at 4h without a nappy she had 2 wees in that time. It's about 6 months since we potty trained and she recently did 2-3h without weeing on a long drive and we get about 15 minutes notice that she needs to have a wee.

My daughter is quite timid and for us increasing the time when she was using the potty worked for us. She had reduced language skills at the time too. We treated these days as building the skills for potty training and then it was more straightforward when we went for it fully. She had been used to the potty as we did lazy EC between 4-12m but when she turned 1 she refused to use the potty.

18 months with DS, 20 months with DD. Both times I waited until the weather was nice so we could do the training in the garden. In terms of readiness the only sign needed imo is whether they can communicate enough to let you know they need a wee or poo. We used Oh Crap and took a few days with each of them and they were reliably dry with no accidents.

DS wasn’t dry at night until he was 4 but DD was 2.5 - I didn’t try to train that, just waited until the morning nappy was consistently dry. Neither have ever wet the bed.

With both mine in the first few days we took them to the toilet once an hour, plenty praise and some chocolate buttons were involved too.

@Justnoidea he can in the sense he can say it but he just doesn’t. I don’t really know why. So I have to just keep telling him to wee at regular intervals. He does but also regularly wets his pants and doesn’t seem bothered by this. And he has not had a poo on the potty or toilet yet and it’s been a month now.

2 of my 3 didn't show signs - it was me getting stressed as pre school here refuse to clean up children in nappies

Eldest girl was 3 - I just booked 2 days off work and didn't leave the house for 4 days. Just said no more nappies and filled her up on juice. Refused to use potty's and would only use the toilet t

Twin girl - 2.5 years just decided she wanted to do it herself and uses the potty

Twin boy 3 - was getting a bit stressed about him to be honest but again stayed home for 4 days. Filled him up on juice and away we went. Also refuses to use potty's. He had it cracked within 2 days

I am worried about school although it’s a while off obviously but it’s just the fact no progress has been made and he doesn’t seem to be engaging with it at all, just doesn’t seem quite right somehow?

We went to visit a nursery for dd when she was 2 years 11 months to look to start nursery at 3 years 3 months. We tried potty training just after the visit and she just couldn’t get it so we stopped. The weekend before she started nursery so 3 years 3 months I gave it another go. It worked and she was dry during the day within a week. She was dry during the night at 4 years 1 month. We used those potty training underwear which are like padded knickers. Really helped. I’ll do same with dd2.

Sorry I didn’t mean they needed to know they needed to know when they needed to go (that’s what I taught them), just that they had enough language to say the words “wee” and “poo”.

The process of training is teaching yhem
to recognise the sensations so that they then can tell you - you don’t need to wait until they can already do this.

Oh crap method gets you to watch for the wee to come out and then plonk them
on to the potty when it starts happening, so that they make the connection between the sensation and the action. Once they can do that it’s a big step forward. The other piece in the puzzle is being able to go at will so that they can eg go for a wee before leaving the house, rather thN waiting until it’s urgent.

My DS was almost non verbal when we trained him (very late at 8 years old- he is disabled) and still can't tell us when he needs to go so it is constant guess work and toilet visits. Solidarity with all parents who are finding it hard. We started at 4 so took approx 3 years of trying...

Oh Crap made me feel so bad. I did try it but I just kept missing it when he had a wee. Not helped by the fact our downstairs is pretty big and has numerous ‘hiding’ places. So even though I followed him around he still just kept weeing on the floor. Eventually I realised it wasn’t working (and the whole tone of the book upset me as well.)

From my experience with ds1 I would have a complete break. Go back to pull ups / nappies wait for about a month then when you have regained your energy, have some free time, and perhaps when the weather warms up have another go. I got so stressed and anxious with ds1 and it was not a pleasant experience for either of us. Conversely, I have no real memories of toilet training ds2 or 3 as I was much more relaxed.

Eldest was 22 months. Happened by accident, was weeing in the paddling pool. I placed her on the potty. Very quickly cottoned on. Lots of part wees on potty. Lots of accidents. But She was very keen. Got there eventually. Dry at night age 4.

DD2. Showed a lot of interest in the potty, lots of sitting but when we tried training (twice) never managed anything on the potty and gave up after 1 day both times. Then recently when at nursery she started using the potty. Had great control of bladder & 2 days with few accidents. Day 3 only accidents. Then it clicked and barely any accidents. Dry at night within 2 weeks of being dry in the day.

DD2 was 2yrs 7m

I don’t know if it’s worth contacting my HV, but I don’t know her really and don’t know if she’ll be able to advise over and above anything I can read here or other sources.

NHS website says my child will probably be upset at having accidents but he isn’t. ERIC website says he should be ready but the fact we’ve made no progress makes me think maybe not. It’s like he just doesn’t understand that if he tells us he wants a wee or poo we can avoid accidents. I’m obviously around lots of similarly aged kids and I hear ‘I need a wee’ all the time!

My DS will turn 3 in 2 months. He refuses to sit on the potty. He refuses to remove his nappy. If he wants a wee and his nappy is off he'd demand to have his nappy back on. We've had a few accidents when trying to ask him to sit on his potty chair but just cries his lungs out without a nappy on him.

Does not sound like he is ready OP. When my children were ready they were trained really quickly, DD was pretty much trained within a day, DS took a few days. Why put yourself through all that stress of cleaning up accidents? Take a break and try again in a couple of months and see if its any easier then.

@icanlovemebetter this is EXACTLY the same as my DD. Her 3 sisters all got the hang of it between 2 and 2.5 years but she just point blank refuses to even try. She'll do it when she's ready.