NCT groups - how long did you stay in contact for?

[Diamond345]

Curious as to how long you stayed in touch with your NCT friends for?

Did any drop out of joining in conversation early on?
Did you meet up often?

In my group, 3 of the women rarely spoke or came out when we arranged regular meet ups. We also did weekly classes and coffee after but again they didn't ever join in with that either nor respond. But would now and then say something. The rest of the mums are great and we are still in contact after a year so far.

I thought most people did NCT for the friendships and support group with other mums with babies the same age, rather than the course content as much!

Just wondering if others experienced this with their NCT group!

About a year. But we moved away.

Ours was an online Covid group. Met up a few times, but being honest we didn’t really click.

On our first in person meet up, one of the other members who works in the same field (I am in house, they are agency) spend the whole time trying to sell to me which really put me off. Some of the parents were also incredibly competitive - not just about babies but also work (who had the most stressful job etc) so we left.

But - I know a number of my friends are really good friends with their NCT groups years later. Just luck of the draw I guess.

Regularly for the first year until most started going back to work. I definitely saw them a couple of times when DC2 was very tiny, but I was already feeling very excluded by the cliqueyness of some of them.

I did an antenatal exercise class and there was a small group of us who socialised a lot in the first year. I stayed close with two of them after that - one ghosted me during covid, but the other is my best "mum" friend. DP and I socialise with her and her partner, I see her for coffee often, and the babies we were pregnant with when we met are now teens who had a sleepover last night and refer to each other as sisters!

I was one who dropped out early on. DS has just turned 1 and I found it to be a complete waste of money. I just had little in common with the other mums.

My group was a massive bust
it was covid so online.

3 of them didn’t live in the local area. At all🥴
1 moved 100 miles away 2 weeks before birth
1 never came to anything. At all. Ever.

that left 2 one lives about 6 miles away so not that local… we are still in touch but 2 years PP I basically am in touch with 1 of them!!!!

They dropped me within weeks of babies being born. I did it for the friends it sucks. I wasn't as well off as them, im a nanny they are the people who hire nannies. They split into two groups kinda quick the rich ones and the teachers/ex teachers. They started their own group chats and left me out very fast I saw in Facebook pictures of them all together and hadn't known they were meeting. It's crap. My mother is still friends with a couple from her NCT group and I was hoping for that

on and off, and now on again with one person out of a group of 6 or so, for 22 years so far. Some people weren't great others were fab, the lady I am still in touch with (speak most days) is a great friend.

Drifted after the first year. We were a bit older than some of the couples and although it sounds a bit stereotypical…as northerners we found them to be typical southerners and didn’t really gel. Most of our friends are northerners we’ve met down south or Europeans!

A family member is still in touch with her NCT buddies from 30 years ago.

20 years!

As a whole group, not quite a year.

But 24 years later and my 2 best friends are from my NCT group.

8 couples, 3 of us went out a couple of weeks ago and are good friends. Kids are almost 20 now. Still in touch with two of the three who emigrated within the first 2-3 years, another one ghosted us after moving an hour away. The remaining local one is not in touch with anyone else which is mainly down to her being an absolute womble.

We had a really odd group. One couple had their baby premature (born just after our first meeting), one couple split up straight after their baby born (stayed in touch with her for a while), then two other couples we saw a few times but it fizzled out. We had nothing in common apart from the obvious. But I am still great friends with various other new mums I met from that time, just not the NCT ones.

My group just didn’t get on at all. We stopped meeting within the first few months. Having had babies at the same time didn’t overcome being very different people.

The one thing we bonded on was the fact that several of us had very interventionist births for various reasons, and this caused great disappointment in our old school hippy NCT teacher at the ‘reunion” gathering. We took great delight in detail precisely how many drugs, interventions etc we had. After that we just drifted apart.

I wouldn’t do it again. The information is freely available elsewhere and NCT is pretty expensive for the possibility of making babyfriends.

We met regularly for about a year but the group got smaller then drifted apart as we all went back to work. I think one or two kept in touch with each other, and I occasionally bump into those still local but didn't really gel with any of them.
I made good friends through baby groups though.

Had the first 'NCT baby' wedding in our group this year. The 'babies' will be 30 in 2024.
I made one of my best friends in our group of 1994 and despite us both moving around over the years, we still meet up a couple of times a year.

One woman in our group came close to death from complications on eclampsia, and split with her boyfriend not long after — she said near-death had clarified what she wanted, and made her realise he was an arse. And one couple had got pregnant accidentally after a ONS and decided to keep the baby and co-parent without being romantically involved.

I still see 2 of the women very regularly (they are amongst my best friends) and one semi regularly. The others are FB friends and we are fond of each other but don't meet up.

We were a COVID group with only 4 couples, we never really clicked and everyone drifted after a year. One couple never responded to anything and then when another announced a second pregnancy said they already had a second child 😂 but didn't feel the need to mention it earlier.

There were 7 of us. We all met up regularly for the first six months or so. And we organised a joint first birthday party.

9 years on, I'm only in touch with 2 of them. However, one of these is pretty much my bestie now and I'd be lost without her.

No, we only met once after the birth of our children.

24 years - good friendship with one couple, Facebook friends with others. Also in touch with mums from mums and baby group (mainly Christmas cards and/or Facebook due to not living in sane area).

Our NCT group stayed in regular contact for the first year and had a big joint 1st birthday party for all the babies. Then gradually things started to drift. People went back to work and regained their social lives, some had 2nd babies, but 3 couples stayed in touch for another couple of years then one moved away and the other divorced so it all fell apart. But for that first year it was a real lifeline.

There are 5 of us who still meet up. We were all the ones in the group who went back to work.

The other 4 see each other much more regularly (they all work PT) and they go on holiday together. I work FT so see them less frequently.

4 divorced, 1 of those re married, 1 still married

24/25 years now

My group didn't gel. One still born baby and a dad who committed suicide weren't a very suspicious start. We met up weekly at first and all came to each other's baby's first birthday parties but I haven't seen them since. I joined in the hope of making long term friends but it didn't work out that way. At the end of the day the only thing you have in common is having a baby at a similar time.