Hotel nanny? Would you feel safe leaving 1 year old?

[sunflowers365]

I am feeling pressurised into using a nanny service at the hotel we will be staying at soon so we can attend a dinner. It’s no kids allowed. I don’t feel comfortable leaving my 1 year old with a hotel nanny abroad. Am I being unreasonable to feel uncomfortable about this?

It doesn’t matter how anyone else feels. If you are not comfortable then don’t do it. Your child, your decision.

I wouldn’t but I generally don’t leave my kids with strangers (at least not at a very young age when they can’t talk). I assume worst case you will be very close by?

Thank you. I totally agree. I feel pressured. I can’t trust a person I don’t know and haven’t had a recommendation from. It’s abroad so I don’t know what sort of checks they do there too.

Thank you. Me neither. I leave my dd with grandparents or her nursery and that’s it. Thanks for your reply.

Absolutely not.

I don’t understand why the hotels even have the service because I don’t understand why anyone would use it.

we have used group childcare with multiple adults and multiple children for verbal, potty trained children. That is distinctly different from leaving your child with an adult that you have not personally chosen and gotten to know in advance alone and unsupervised with your child.

No I wouldn’t, don’t allow yourself to be pressured in to it.

I wouldn't. But it doesn't matter what I or anyone else thinks. If you aren't happy then don't do it. You need to trust your gut and noone gets to question parenting choices on things like this. I wouldn't be paying to go out for a dinner that I'd be sitting uncomfortably through.

No. Absolutely not.

Not a chance. Wouldn’t in this country or abroad. Saying that, I know people who would and they are neither idiots nor terrible parents. Personally, I only feel comfortable leaving my children with close family - it’s a very short list!! If you aren’t comfortable, OP, then absolutely don’t do it.

Thank you so much everyone

Which country?

I've had this. I slept badly all night. Insisted on taking passports and then bailed last min. (5 and 3 years) the nanny was very well recommended. I just couldn't do it.

It's a personal choice. But if you don't feel comfortable, don't do it

I wouldn’t but I know lots do. Don’t do it if it makes you feel uncomfortable.

I've been a nanny, I am a parent and there's no way I'd be comfortable leaving such a young child in the care of a stranger for an evening. Especially in an unfamiliar environment.

As others have said, if you're not comfortable, don't do it. It's not like you'd be able to relax or enjoy the time even if you gave into the pressure.

If you have a dp/dh take turns in the room with the child or one sits it out.

Definitely not. At that age my children would have been traumatised if left with a stranger.

I wouldn't leave my v young child with a stranger.

Happy to leave them with nursery, family and close friends but not a complete stranger!

Depends on the circumstances...
Is the dinner in the hotel itself?
Does your child wake often?

We've left dc with babysitters and cameras on them sleeping in their beds if we are in the building and near to the room. Obviously we suss out if we like the person babysitting - maybe you could meet them in the day and get a feel for their experience?

I wouldn't go for dinner outside of the hotel though.

And actually as a nanny, taking on such a young child for one evening as a complete stranger is very difficult and not fun for either party.

Yes absolutely I would do it, cavet being that I know the hotel’s childcare staff are qualified and checked to a standard comparable to the UK. I’d put them to bed and I know they wouldn’t stir so the sitter would literally just be for emergencies. But your choice, not mine. So what I’d do shouldn’t be relevant.

No YANBU. I never left mime in the care of anyone not related to them until they were 4.

Yes I would and I have.

I also would and have done. Presumably if it’s an evening meal your child will mainly be asleep anyway

I would definitely not ! You have plenty of time to go to adult only parties when they are older. I know the McCann case is quoted a lot on here so I don’t need to say any more.

Absolutely not. That would be over my dead body only.

I wouldn't but it's irrelevant what anyone else would do.

If you're not comfortable with it then it's your call as their parent.

I think it's unreasonable for the other adults you're with to put pressure on you to leave your child with a stranger. It's not their decision to make.