For those that didn’t enjoy baby stage, when did it get better for you?

[Zaphiera]

Literally as the title says. Please don’t judge me but I really really don’t enjoy babies, I’m 11 months in and still struggling. I know it’ll be amazing when she can walk and communicate a little bit instead of whining but I’m wondering when I’ll enjoy parenting a bit more. I’m hoping once summer hits, she’ll be 18 months and we’ll be slowly on the same page a little bit more.

For those that didn’t enjoy infancy, when did it really start to change for you?

When they could talk. It made a huge difference for me. We are best buddies now!

When they could walk it made a big difference but honestly it was around 2, 2.5 for me with my two DC that i really started enjoying them Main reason was they were terrible sleepers up until then, the lack of decent sleep left me with low mood. It will get better x

When he moved past the constant whining stage - so maybe four!?

Five was great and six is fabulous. I just didn't really enjoy baby and toddler. Obviously love him to pieces but you just don't get much back until later on.

Apart from the fact they're cute.

You're not alone. The baby stage is relentless! I found the toddler years more fun.

I’m only five weeks in and the lack of sleep is really getting to me. I don’t know how I can keep doing this, I feel ill from exhaustion. My husband is more than pulling his weight, I can’t ask any more of him as he covers the 2am-7am shift then goes to work.
My baby falls to sleep on the boob when feeding, then sleeps in the cot for max 20 minutes (if at all) then starts screaming. 😭
It’s so awful to not enjoy this when I tried to conceive for years.

No criticism from me. I hired a nanny and went back to work after 12 weeks. But to answer your question, when she started walking and talking - that went for all of them. Quite why I went through it three times is still a source of confusion, I can only question my own intelligence.

For me it improved a lot after a year because the baby was more of a person and it became more fun.
However, I do have to warn you that one year old is quite tough! They're mobile but have no common sense so you constantly have to watch them and steer them away from danger.
I found two to four years old nice. You can do fun activities together and they say such cute things. It's lovely seeing the world through their eyes - that sense of wonder they have over quite mundane things. Obviously you have tantrums to contend with during the toddler years but I still enjoyed them.
Once they were at school I found it a piece of cake!
My daughter's just turned 13 so life's becoming a little more... "interesting" but not too bad yet.

@ES1986 - hang in there, the first 12 weeks are incredibly hard for everyone but it usually starts getting easier quite fast by 12 weeks as baby gets used to being in the world and you get used to living with the baby. I expect right now that even leaving the house feels like the biggest stress in the world, but it does get easier. But the early days are a schlep. Good luck!

I’m at 16 months and it’s much better still relentless but even with two wakeups per night it’s better than newborn… the babbling and them thinking they are talking to you is hilarious but the lack of freedom, sleep and fighting over food is relentless

I nearly threw a party when I got rid of the back breaking baby car seat. Like everyone else says when they can walk, talk, use the loo, sleep through most nights and don’t need to be constantly fed, it is so much easier. I guess for me it was age 3 and upwards. Hang in there and lower your standards in other areas of your life while the baby is so young.

I'd say about 2. Once they can walk and talk properly.
It got easier and better with every year after that, yes including the teenage years. But I never liked babies before and I don't really now. It's just drudgery for the first months.

When they were toddlers. Especially when they could talk. They were so cute and funny and excited by the world. Best of all, if they were upset you could ask why and they'd tell you, so you can put it right.

I loved the toddler years. Hard work but so many payoffs with funny things they say and do and their massive appreciation of pretty much everything in existence. Wow!!!! A worm!!!! Look - a BUS!!!! etc

For me it was age 5. I found the baby stage so hard and miserable and then found out that the toddler years were even worse. As we approached age 5 I finally started to enjoy being mum.

Age 5!!!

9

She was a great baby and toddler I just hated being so utterly responsible for everything. I hated the job of “Mum”. The school lunches, the entertaining, the homework.

At 9 she had a lot more independence and could get her own breakfast on a Saturday morning etc.

I only had 1 because I hated it so much. Obviously I adore her and would do anything for her but I hated the relentlessness of motherhood.

School age

When they went to school!!

Babies and toddlers are so overrated. School-aged kids are the best (and teenagers get a rotten rep, too).

I liked the late toddler stage, like 2.5 until about 4.5 then the constant running commentary on everything starts and my head is battered once more.

From 2.5yrs was much better, but I really started enjoying it from 5 years so school age. Only one - couldn't face it again!

Around 2, they just get better and better from then!

Couldn't stand the baby stage. Went back to work at 6 months ish as I'd had enough. It's been tons better since about 18 months, you have a person to engage with rather than a potato!

I have an 11 month old too and it is difficult. My eldest is 10 and we’re best pals, he’s been a breeze since he was about 4. But I remember it getting easier around 18 months/2 when you can interact with them more and enjoy things together.

I didn’t enjoy the baby stage at all. I’d say every year it has been noticeably more enjoyable and absolutely love hanging out with my primary aged kids and even more so as they get older.
We have all kinds of chats and shared interests.

Gets better and better every day in my experience. Mine's just turned two and I love parenting him :). Probably not having a second because I have no desire to go back to the baby stage again - if I could give birth to a 2 year old I'd consider it haha.

Different people enjoy/thrive in different stages OP. Hang in there x

Thank you everyone! I don’t have a village to help (in fact I have no one!) and my little girl will only go to sleep for me so no matter how hands on her dad is, he can only help around working hours. And she wakes every 1-2 hours so not only am I exhausted physically, she’s incredibly whiny ( doesn’t like the car or the pram ect…) so I’m mentally done in as well.

Im going back to work in February and I’m counting down the minutes to have something, anything else to do and use it as a break from her. Especially as I work from home so I might actually be able to half chill/half clean whilst I’m at it and not live in a constantly trashed house!