Let 3 year old use iPad?

[Herts501]

Would you let a just-turned 3 year old play age appropriate educational games on an iPad? (supervised and time limited)

Myself and my husband are having a difference of opinion!

No. DS was brought one by a relative at 2 and I sent it back. I teach and see plenty of children who are over reliant upon entering school. Children that young don't need tablets they learn best through hands on activities and through play and that play does not need to be via a screen.

I let mime start using Cbeebies games from age 3 on our tablet, only in long journeys, tablet not connected to wifi. So realistically that was a few times a year only. It took her awhile to get to grips with them, was very annoying if I wasn't sat next to her as she wasn't independent on them.

At 5 she's now more independent with using it, we still keep it only for journeys of over an hour in the car, and maybe a few other very rare exceptional situations like certain hospital appointments or something. She still has only ever used Cbeebies apps, Peppa Pig game app, and colouring/drawing type apps.

So when he was 3 he never asked for it outside of weekends and never once complained about having to stop/ask for more time.

No. Maybe for a flight. Tv better than tablets according to research.

Absolutely not. But I don't let my ten year old either. They rot children's brains and stop them learning to read. Watching TV for however long with your family and discussing what you have watched is far more interactive than sitting alone pawing at a screen in my opinion.
As a teacher I can tell which children have strict limits on screen use every.single.year. they are always, ALWAYS the children who also have the longest concentration spans and best social skills.

Of course! Ffs only on mumsnet would the oh so righteous ones tell you it's terrible! They don't live in the real world. Do what you need to do to stay sane!

Try a Yoto instead, they can sit and listen to music/stories safely and independently choose/work it.

I never get responses like this of course those of us who don't give tablets to small children live in the real world. We're not some mythological creature that resides only on Mumsnet.

@Sanch1 It's very depressing that people think not giving a toddler a computer game is an unrealistic standard of parenting. What's wrong with a sticker book or some crayons?

Yes that's fine. Only on mumsnet will they tell you it's not ok 🤣 The latest studies show that a kid who spends hours a day on a device will be a bit behind in some things (unsurprisingly) but even those with the most screen time had caught up by age 5.

God yes, that's when I take my shower!

Yes, we bought DD an Amazon Fire tablet at about 3. She's almost 5 now and whilst she enjoys playing on it, she isn't obsessed or anything like any of the negative comments claim. She still loves reading and board games etc. It's just another toy/option that's around (and one I'm quite fond of at 6.30am on a Sunday morning!!). She plays on it on her own or with me and sometimes just uses it to watch something so we don't have to listen to it too.

Because even the most well behaved and lovely toddler will get bored of stickers and crayons after approximately 2 minutes! I'm not saying stick them in front of a tablet 12 hours a day but sometime when a patent needs to get something done, or needs 20 minutes downtime is not going to harm the child for life!

I agree with this. The Yoto player is fantastic.

iPads are totally inappropriate for small children.

In your example, the TV would be a better option. Multiple studies have shown the addictive nature of tablets and phones and the games themselves are designed to be addictive. There’s a reason the makers of these games and of tablets/phones don’t let their own kids have them.

You make it sound like it's stickers and crayons or a tablet though and it's not. Yes small children may get bored but a tablet isn't the only answer to getting 20 minutes of downtime and to be honest it's not the end of the world for a 3 year old to be bored every now and then and realise that mummy or daddy need to do something first before they can play.

Yes, mine played Cbeebies games from around that age, and Tetris. Limited time, everything blocked, and it trained him early in understanding that he had a time limit, and if I say it's going off and he whinges, he doesn't get it again for some time.

We still did other things - he was in nursery so lots of time doing drawing and cutting and sticking etc with no screen in sight. Lots of day trips. Lots of books, Lego, Brio etc. He could read simple words, count past 100 and do basic maths before he started school. Screens are fine as one of many options, and as long as you actually keep control of them and parent properly.

Definitely not.

I did with my older 2 who are now 8 & 6, but really trying not to for as long as possible with current 1 year old. Hope we’ll get to 3!
The older 2 had their first taste of devices other than telly due to travel around age 1. Middle child watched SO MUCH YouTube kids from say age 2-4, hours a day. Terrible!! Went cold turkey and now tbh he actually never has personal screens, only tv. 8 year old is utterly obsessed and when he’s home goes from tv to switch to Roblox (need to ban that one) with some board games and sports thrown in. He’s obsessed with any game.

Anyway I veered off topic but long and short of it is that I’ve done it and am trying not to now I have another go round!

No. Not a chance. They are addictive..so no amount of arguing they are educational should wash.

As someone who did give their 3 year old a tablet (this was in the first lockdown and I was going slightly mad trying to wfh!) I’d avoid it as long as possible.

Dd’s behaviour was always awful when she had access to a tablet, even if the app was educational. It just does something to their little brains.

Shes almost 7 and doesn’t have one anymore. I far prefer her to craft, play pretend with her barbies etc and her behaviour improved endlessly when she didn’t have one.

I would hold off as long as you can.

I use it under very specific circumstances where they must sit quietly and there isn’t really anything else to do- plane travel, very long car journeys… that sort of thing. Other than that the toddler’s ipad lives in the cupboard. It hasn’t been out since we got back from our holiday at the start of August. My 6YO is allowed hers for approx 30 minutes a day once her brother is in bed, earned through good behaviour (homework done, bedroom tidy etc). 3 is way too young to use it regularly IMO.

Most people offer screen time as a way of avoiding good parenting.

I'm sorry, but it's no substitute for conversation, books, museums, sports, and getting out into nature.

Unpopular opinion.

I let them use the CBeebies games 'playtime island' on car/train/plane journeys plus anything we are having to wait around for stuff like when I've had to take them to my hospital's appointments. I don't allow them to use it at home.

You know what I have a DC who has access to a tablet from around 3, always used parental controls and time limits. At 6 he progressed to a switch- same deals.
He only watches YouTube on the family tv so I can see what he’s watching and turn it off when it gets annoying to me/before it sends him into a cycle of madness.

we’re several years post setting this up now. And he can read (been at GDS throughout school so far), has been to lots of museums/cultural experiences. Loves theatre. Has friends and hobbies. Loves camping and has not technology at all when he does that.

it’s not a binary choice of screen time automatically ruining lives. I do think there’s some truth in the fact that these kids are growing up in a digital world and should be taught how to handle it.