Are middle class parents stricter?

[fromthbottomofmyheart]

The idea is that middle class parents are typically high achievers themselves, or come from a background of high achievement. Doesn't it make sense that MC parents would have higher expectations than working / upper class parents?

My view is no, they tend to be almost afraid of their kids and overanalyse every minor interaction trying to do everything the ‘right way’. In the process they pass on their anxieties to their kids and encourage them to overthink.

I was walking on the beach earlier and a girl, probably around 3, was having a tantrum as she wasn’t allowed an ice cream. Her mum was doing the whole ‘performative gentle parenting’ thing, cooing ‘Awww I know Charlotte, I would be very cross if I wasn’t allowed an ice cream too, but you had one yesterday’. The little girl seemed completely bemused, you could tell she was was thinking ‘well if you would also be cross then I’m in the right so why can’t I have one?’. It was ridiculous - my kid would’ve just had a ‘No, you can’t have one every day.’

My view is that if you constantly express worry to your kids then they’ll grow up to be worriers themselves. Constantly quizzing them on whether they’re okay, their feelings, their friendships will encourage them to ruminate and dwell in a way that isn’t healthy.

The focus on education and health is good but I feel a dollop of proper discipline and common sense is now needed to make the next MC generation the best they can be.

I'd say absolutely not. My dh and I often talk about lax our children's middle class friends parents are. Bordering neglectful. Entitled, Unruly kids, long hair left uncombed, and no manners. Our working class friends are much stricter and their children are a delight.

I live in a MC area and the children, in general, have good manners and behave well. I think behaviour and attainment has more to do with how engaged the parents are with their children’s lives and things like boundary enforcement and those aren’t necessarily class based.

Completely agree with this.

My logic is that by being shouted at, WC children are guilted into loyalty to their communities, e.g. the shame of abandoning your roots if you did well in school and climbed the social ladder

I’m a teacher. There’s kids who lack boundaries in both WC and MC households. You get all different types of parenting really (have worked in affluent and poorer catchment area schools).

I much prefer working with WC kids though. The MC parents are much more unpleasant, deluded and entitled. Their kids have just as many MH problems but they present in a more covert manner.

Not always. The amounts of times ingsvr heard yummy mummies say'mummy won't tekk u again ' on repeat makes me want to scream. The pampered prince and princess brigade are no doubt a by product of some of this. I am a product of strict working class parents. Reasonably high achiever.

Your logic really is flawed I think OP. As previous comments have stated, there are various parenting styles that cannot be attributed blanket fashion to WC or MC.

Tough love is true love