How old is to old to have a baby?

[midnights0]

Me and my fiancé have been TTC for nearly a year now. I've had a miscarriage at 5 weeks & a MMC at 12 weeks - 6 weeks ago. My fiancé is 39, 40 this year. I'm 27. He would have just turned 40 by the time our baby should have been born. We had some comments about that. He has 2 kids from a previous marriage, age 16 and 12. The kids were really excited to have younger sibling. We are taking a break of TTC until our wedding in Oct, then trying again. I've had a few comments off people saying my fiancé will be to old to have a baby by the time I have one. I'm hoping to have a baby in the next year or 2, but nothing is guaranteed, he says he will keep going as he so desperately wants a baby with me too, I said maybe another 3-4 years of trying?

Is 40-45 to old to become a father to a newborn again? He's very fit, active, works full time doing manual work. Does. Not. Rest, lol. He does everything and more! I don't want to have our rainbow baby and people put a downer on it cos of his age. I mean we are going to do it anyway because it's what we want (and he doesn't care what people say) I'm just wondering other peoples views, thanks if you read this

There’s no right age, particularly for men. There’s pros and cons of both. For women obviously there’s the health implications that come with age.

im pregnant with number 3 and I’m 36, DH is 46. I would have liked a 4th baby but for me he will be too old by the time we would be ttc again and it took 19months for this one.

I'm the eldest of three. My dad was 39 when I was born, 45 when my youngest sibling was born. Played games, ran around, was very active. Depends on the person but I don't think 40-45 is too young to have a newborn.

I don’t think 40 is too old, it’s pretty common nowadays. I think 45 is verging on too old, mainly because he’ll be 60 and still looking after a 15 year old. He’ll have to work quite late whilst DC is in uni.

Sorry for your loss OP 💐 No, he’s not too old. Ignore the nay sayers

@Mummyme87 men don't really have health complications do they? I'm 27, so probably have about 10 years of TTC left in me 🤣 congrats on your pregnancy

Sperm quality and mobility does decline with age for men, so age does have some impact on fertility.

@midnights0 not health implications for pregnancy which obviously women do, although general health implications that come with age. Child 15 and dad 60… more likely to have heart disease/stroke etc. I guess it also depends on the person, what they health is like. My DH is fit and healthy from that perspective, cycles to work

@notanotherclairebear deffo depends on the person, I know people his age who can not work due to health problems etc

@Overthebow I'm hoping he will be 40-42 if we ever get our rainbow. 60 does seem old to have a teen to me too

@FoodFann thank you ❤️ I worry to much about what people say

@Overthebow @Mummyme87 he was taking these tablets for men for months because he was convinced his sperm was no good lol (he had googled a load of stuff) , we did actually end up conceiving but unfortunately lost the baby.

40 -45 is definitely not too old in my opinion.

40

Regarding male fertility I watched a great video few months ago and the fertility expert said people don't realise the male fertility start reducing from late 30s/early 40s (quality of sperm). Has impact on pregnancy and health complications for the baby.

Personally I'd say 41. I know several woman who have had babies between 40-46.

And I have a SIL and a couple of friends who were born to older mothers and are now in very difficult situations.

My mum and dad were both 43 when they had me and both in 70s now with no issues

I think try to think less about how he’ll be at 40 (as you can be fit and healthy with no troubles at all) vs being 65 with one at uni. It’s not too old but it just changes the way your life looks, means he will be a lot older when it comes to grandkids which may or may not bother you

I'm really sorry to hear that, OP. I hope you're both ok.

No, 40 is not too old. My DH was 38 when our youngest was born and he's one of the most fun and energetic dads I know. He's 43 this year and I'd have another with him in a heartbeat!

No it’s fine. I think ideally you have your kids before 40, but I think late 40s / 50
(ie menopause time) should be the cut off for men and women - that way you should be around till your kids are 25 or 30.

I'm 38 and have felt too old for about 5 years.

For a woman 42.

For a man, 55 (as long as he has a younger wife and the energy/money to ensure the baby’s welfare).

It isn’t fair but hey.

Very sorry about your miscarriages, hope things improve for you both.

Yes @Olika I had appreciated how make fertility decreases with age, quite significantly. The month before we conceived I got DH to reduce his caffeine intake. Who knows if that helped!

Any age you can conceive. Men can physically produce sperm and impregnate a partner until they are about 80. 40 is not too old to father a child, especially as you are younger. My Dad was 41 when I was born and 45 when my younger sister was born. He was the most wonderful Dad to us both.

You could have 15 or even 20 years left!

I was nearly 41, DH was nearly 46. There’s additional risks but we conceived easily and all was well.

My Dsis was 42 when she had her youngest son. Bil was 45.

I was 45 and ex was 54. Ds is 15 now, no issues, Conceived naturally (when not actually trying 😳)