None of what you said will be enough to loose your kids.
My advice is stop drinking immediately and be t total for a while. Next time you are asked about your drinking you can say you are t total, yes you like a drink but you won't risk your kids over the malicious accusations so just quit all drink to show it's not a problem.
We're your kids away when you drank the wine on the bedside? I'd make a point of mentioning this to the SW tbh. I know of people who have tried to stop druggie exes from having overnight contact with the kids and the ex just said yeah I do drugs just not when I have charge of the kids. Family court judge was fine with this.
And screenshot all abuse texts etc. email them to yourself so if he breaks your phone you still have them. I recommend setting up a new email address just for this so you have all the evidence in one easy to access place. No more phone conversations with ex do it all via email preferably. Do handovers in public places with cctv.
Change your passwords!!! Email bank pins. Change your security questions to things you know he doesn't know. I know of someone who's ex logged into their email with forgotten password thing- send a load if abuse to themselves and making confessions etc etc then he deleted it from sent folder. And used it as evidence the victim w
As the abuser. She went to the police said he'd hacked her and I don't know what the result was she never updated.
Get a ring doorbell.
Go back through all your old messages as far back as you can. Screenshot and email all the evidence of abuse to yourself. If you have never accused him of abuse before you will find he just says you are saying that now after the fact because he's accusing you of what he is. Have you even text friends about what he's done to you? Etc etc. gather all the evidence you can it's historical and you are not making it up.
Most of this advice I'm giving is with family court in mind in case he goes for resident parent to take the kids. Don't be scared of that either. If you have the old messages and quit drinking you will be ok. For SS i honestly don't think you need to worry right now. Just do everything they suggest they have to take you to court to take the kids and at that point you get a solicitor on legal aid if you can't afford one. They may threaten it but they don't get to decide to take your kids it's a judge and it's a long process to get to that point.
They may just dismiss this referral as malicious straight away, although I suspect the wine bottle coupled with ex saying you drink would make them bad social workers to not investigate further if I'm honest. If they start talking about a section 47 assessment come back here and ask for advice again. Don't be scared it's just the process to see if there are genuine safeguarding concerns- very common domestic abuse victims go through them, often multiple times because of accusations from the ex- but they can and usually do result in no future action- maybe even support for you. Try to remember some kids actually are abused by their mothers and if they didn't investigate properly those kids would never be hurt. It's all about the kids.
You want to be short and factual about ex when you talk to SS. You don't want to go on and on and appear to be too wrapped up in it. They want to see you are putting the children first always and in everything. Unless your ex was abusive to the kids the fact he abused you doesn't mean he should not have relationship with the children. Children benefit from relationships with both parents. (Want to make it clear that's not my opinion I think it's fucking disgusting kids can be used as pawns by abusive ex in these games but that isn't what SS or family court think so you have to show concern but not be seen to "block contact"). On that note NEVER bad mouth ex to the kids.
Contact woman's aid. They are amazing. Do the freedom program- in person in a group of you can I found that support from others who understand invaluable. And tell the social worker you are doing it.
And if you find you can't stop drinking then face you have a problem and seek help. Lying will only go badly for you and it's not good for your kids. Again I've met people who had addictions who we're getting support for it and hadn't lost their kids they just had heavy involvement from services for the safety of the kids.
And look up the grey rock method. Honestly it's the only thing that works with these men
Don't be scared. He's doing this to make you scared. Even if you are scared don't let him see it xxx