Social services

[Anonymousgirlxoxox]

My ex has called social on me , the day I left him he rang the police and social. Now this man in a abusive horrible person and he's doing everything in his power to destroy me .

Since I left 6 days ago , he's doing nothing but pester me and mentally abuse me. He's came Upto my house twice ! For no good reason . Told me to die , tell me I'm a shit mum all sorts.

Now today , I had a knock at my door . It's the social , she came in asked me a few questions about my drinking ( i wine on a night around 3 glasses ) few days a week when kids are in bed. Now my ex has reported me for shouting at kids , putting the kids to bed at 6pm (3 &5 ) and my drinking .. she said it was a anonymous report . I new straight away it was my ex cos he told me . And I told her my side . I said he won't give me time he won't leave me alone . Anyway she had a look around my home . I wasn't dirty just few things that I hadn't moved . One wine bottle on my bed side . And my sons bed didn't have any bedding due to been in the wash. And I got a new bed so my old mattress was in the bathroom fgs . So now I'm over thinking everything! She looked in my fridge I had plently of food . I'm so scared my kids are going to be taken away . She seen the hole in the door that he did and wrote cunt on my door and the hole in my upstairs that he did. She didn't take photos or anything. Now they are going to speak to my son at school , and put a police report in but don't no what ??? So scared need advice

There was 1 empty wine bottle . And one glass . No dirty plates anywhere else

I would suggest you don't meet the threshold for intervention so may be directed to Family Early Help - which is voluntary

@MetaverseMavis what is that ? I new to all of this

The threshold is the local authorities lowest level for stepping in.

You were assessed by SS once for missing one appointment?

Reading between the lines, it sounds like it may be a good thing for you to be on the radar of social services. It will mean your children don't slip through the net and they have to come first

They aren't going to take your children for that. Make sure you report all abuse to the police and I recommend you self refer to the local domestic abuse service for support now.

Why did they check your room as that isn’t something they usually do it’s only the kids rooms they check not the parents

I just showed her around she asked me too , she seemed polite .

It’s not standard to see the parents room or the bathroom tbh. Sounds odd.

There is no standard. We don't only check children's rooms. Nothing odd about this.

They do only check children’s rooms they have no rights to enter parents rooms unless the children also sleep in there!

I wasn't commenting on the empty wine bottle or glass. A few dirty dishes and a bit of laundry laid about is fine. IME

Like if they're In the kitchen sink and laundry tidy on a table. They're also not about about dirty laundry in the basket in kitchen. Along as child is happy and content and no way neglected all is fine

Bothered*

It's not about rights. They can ask, parents can say no, but if they have reason to they definitely might ask

You were assessed by SS once for missing one appointment?

Yeah, in no world would that happen.

This actually does happen. It's the standard for ss to check in if a child's appointment is missed. Usually there's no further action but they have to assess and ask why the appointment was missed.

@Leah5678 yeah that's what they said to me x

Good evening can I arsk a question can anyone tell me why would your Social worker arsk if my children want a passport they in temporary foster care what would be the reason for this any help welcome 😳😡

All children looked after by the local authority are entitled to have a passport.

Thank you for your reply

Oh ok it just something that I don't understand why

Is it something we should accept

Why wouldn't you? They will pay for it, it's an essential form of ID and it's in their interests to have them.

OK great thank you x for your advice and information

Having social involved isn't a bad thing. They can also help you deal with ex. The malicious reports would only make him look bad. You do need to deal with your drinking though. You're alone with the kids. If you hired a babysitter and they drank as much wine as you do, would you be happy with it? Of course not, so why do you do it? They're the most precious thing in your life.