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Parenting

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Original poster

Did you always know how many kids you wanted?

44 replies

juliajo · 28/06/2023 18:05

Just curious, did it change for you after having one, or two, or did you end up with the number you’d always wanted

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wildfirewonder · 28/06/2023 18:15

I ended up with fewer, due to circs rather than a change of mind, and now I think I got the right number

bookworm14 · 28/06/2023 18:18

Assumed I would have two as it’s the done thing, had one, never wanted any more.

DorotheaHomeAlone · 28/06/2023 18:18

Thought I wanted 3 or 4. Knew I’d hit my limit at 3.

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cocksstrideintheevening · 28/06/2023 18:18

Thought I'd have one, got twins. Wouldn't change it but after that pregnancy not a chance I'd be going for 3

BreviloquentBastard · 28/06/2023 18:20

I didn't get chance to think about it before I had one, so I'm not sure I knew how many I wanted. But once I'd had one I knew that'd be it for me! Never wanted another, never been broody since, never had that mad all encompassing need for a baby that some women speak of. I'm very happy with my little family unit as it is.

Upsadiddles · 28/06/2023 18:22

It changed for us. I always wanted 3 and DH was happy with that plan. Then DC1 was a very difficult baby. DH would have happily stopped at one but even though I dreaded the baby days of a second DC I still wanted another. We have a slightly bigger age gap then originally planned (delayed TTC due to Covid) and I had a tough high risk second pregnancy. That along with 2 c-sections, being in my late 30s, and feeling like we were very lucky that DC2 is healthy, means we decided we were very grateful for our two and definitely no more. DC2 was a million times easier than DC1 but I still have no doubt whatsoever that our family is complete. (DH has now had the snip). Even if I did have a little pang of ‘what if’ over a third, which I never have, DC2 has since morphed into a complete terror toddler to snap me out of it.

Nannyfannybanny · 28/06/2023 18:23

Growing up as an only child, said I wanted 6,,Ex H disagreed! Came off the pill,told him his turn,condoms! Had 3,one miscarriage. Second DH one miscarriage,DD at 41,then early menopause!

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 28/06/2023 18:23

Only ever thought of having 2 and had 2

PicnicInthecar · 28/06/2023 18:24

Wanted 3, had 7

MrsSamR · 28/06/2023 18:27

Wanted 2, have 2 and no desire for another! Our family feels perfect as is.

KittySmith1986 · 28/06/2023 18:27

I wanted loads, 7 at least. I have 2. That was more practical! Have always loved having a house full so my dc know their friends are girlfriends are always welcome and often hang out here! I love it.

storypushers · 28/06/2023 18:37

Wanted 4, had 2, still want 4, DH doesn't so we're sticking at 2.

MuMmaOf3littles · 28/06/2023 18:37

Always wanted 3 from a young age. Did umm and ahh about a 4th last year and after nearly losing our toddler daughter we thought life is too short and I'm now 11 days away from having our last baby, no4.

NCJD · 28/06/2023 18:39

Pregnant with number 2. Would have liked 3 but I really don’t want to do pregnancy again and I don’t think DH would want a 3rd, so I’m pretty certain we are done.

thehappyhaggis · 28/06/2023 18:56

I always thought I'd defo have 2 with a possibility of 3. I have 1 and won't be having any more. Its not likely I'd be able to have any more even if I wanted to but I don't think that is the reason. I genuinely feel really fulfilled with my 1!

Ejismyf · 28/06/2023 18:59

Yes I wanted the same number we ended up having.

jessnoah · 28/06/2023 19:01

Wanted three, have three but all boys so I've decided to go for one more in the hopes I'll have a girl. If not then it is what it is, we'll stick at four.

ZickZack · 28/06/2023 19:03

I grew up an only in a single parent family and really missed that family unit. So I always wanted 3 or 4 growing up.

I've settled now with 2. I still think a third would be lovely but I'd rather give the two I have more than spread myself thinner

OneMoreCookieMonster · 28/06/2023 19:05

Wanted 5 just had number 2. Due to secondary infertility and now age. We will stop at 2. Number 2 was our unexpected miracle. Font want to push our luck

lartei · 28/06/2023 19:08

I have 3. I never planned to have dc at all and when I had dc1 I expected to have just one, and I was a single parent so raised dc1 pretty much as an only. Then got married and had dc2, but didn't plan on another as I'd quite enjoyed the dynamic of having just one child to look after (dc1 technically an adult by then). Then had a financial windfall and decided to quit work, so thought we might as well go for dc3 for a bit more company and to stop rattling around in our new house. Getting sterilised this year so there will be no more!

Kelpi · 28/06/2023 19:11

I would have liked 3 or 4. DH would have been happy with 1. Compromised and had 2. Both are ND and it's been harder work than I imagined so although I do feel a bit sad we didn't have more I think I would have found it very stressful and been a crap parent, especially if the 3rd/4th was also ND.

IncompleteSenten · 28/06/2023 19:14

I always wanted 3.

Ended up only having 2 because both have disabilities and I felt that it would be unfair to them for me to have another child and that I needed to focus on supporting them.

It was the sensible and right choice. Its the weirdest feeling though. Like there's a person missing from my family who should have been here.

BertieBotts · 28/06/2023 19:16

I knew I wanted at least two and thought probably more, secretly loved the idea of having a massive family. I have three and am happy with that.

LT2 · 28/06/2023 19:17

I always wanted 2. Now I have 1 I still want that. Just not yet😆

badg3r · 28/06/2023 19:19

Wanted three had three. Thanks can relate to feeling like there was someone missing when we were a family of four.

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