Is 24 considered young to be a mum ?

[newmum10000000]

Or is this an average age?

@leelaay I just looked at a calculator & if I was a single parent on 50k I would get £175 a month for 2 dc which wouldn't really help much! I assume once I add DHs income I wouldn't get anything.

Not all young mums live in social housing with no career prospects, but that's what you'd assume is the inevitability from some of these replies.

I certainly don't think that, the chance of a young person getting social housing for one thing is unlikely! 😆

@bathty we are talking about younger families who are starting out in their careers, so I'm not sure why you are putting in a far above average salary to try and dismiss my point? When we were in the childcare days our house salary ranged from about £25k (we were both minimum wage briefly) up to about £40/45k which is when the help curtailed off. Now we are a 6 figure household, because of the support we got to keep our careers going with the kids.

It depends where you are. Had DC1 in London at 30 and was youngest in NCT class by 4 years.

It paid up to 75% of the bill if I remember rightly. I know when I had 2 in nursery I was getting a 4 figure sum of TC.

Because of fertility issues in my 30s, I wish I had met DH when I was in my 20s. I might have been able to have the big family I craved. But I didn't and there was no-one when I was 24 that I would have wanted to procreate with. Plus, I was in the middle of my traineeship with no permanent role, didn't have my own home and was wildly naive and immature. It would have been a disaster! When I had DS I was married with a steady job and income, savings and a home. Those things were important to me.

But for others, it would have been fine to have a child at 24. Everyone's experiences are different and if you can support a child then do what you like.

I had my first at 18 and my last at 40. I definitely had more energy at 18 and more life skills, knowledge and patience at 40. I don’t think any of my children had a better childhood than the other.

This is the crux of it, as with most things in life there is no perfect, there will be pros and cons and it's determining your own priorities (whilst being open minded enough to understand everyone is different!)

I had my first child at 30 and my last at 37 . I cannot imagine having a child at 40 plus . The difference in energy between my first and last was tangible.
Understand that circumstances can be the reason to have a child in 40s but otherwise the lovely house etc can wait! Just look at the conception board to see the heartache that these lovely women are going through .

Depends on your circle and area. Multiple people from my school were on their 3rd by the time I finished college. Most had at least one by mid-20s. All our parents had us early 20s too. I was from a 'poorer' area with a high concentration of council housing. Less than 50% of my secondary school year continued into college level qualifications.

My DH went to a selective school where most parents had only 1/2 kids in late 30s to early 40s, we were the first in his friendship group to get pregnant early/mid 30s, even most of those not in his friendship group didn't have kids either! Most of his peers had degree educated parents, relatively posh area. Pretty much all went to college, many of his peers went all the way through to postgraduate degrees.

By my home standards 24 was pretty old for a first, by my DHs 24 was a solid decade before anyone else!

@leelaay sorry I'm not sure why you think i'm trying to dismiss your point. I just put in my salary equivalent I was earning approx 35-40k 9 years ago which is about 50k today.

Now we are a 6 figure household, because of the support we got to keep our careers going with the kids.

I suppose we just did it the other way around & needed the 6 fig salary to afford a mortgage & dc. We didn't have the option of cheap accommodation though.

It's younger than average but not extremely young. I was about your age when I had mine. They are teens now and some people I went to school with are just having babies now and that feels so weird to me when mine are nearly grown and I'm sure they thought it was weird me having mine young. Dd found out the other day that her boyfriends mum is knocking 60, she found that completely bizarre, she was like imagine having a nana for a mum!
We all do it differently, personally I don't regret having mine young, going from partying all night to sleepless nights was a breeze and I can relate well to them now that they are teens. I'm sure older mums feel the same.

22 when I had my 1st never felt too young,had a good job that I went back to. Why do you care what people think? I'd rather have them in early 20s I had more energy then to run round after them 2nd born I was 30 am 37 now and I can definitely feel the difference physically wise, how people want till 40s I'll never know.

It's younger than average and younger than the average age of marriage. I think very few people are in a stable relationship at 24 and have stable housing and sufficient money to have children without being dependant on handouts. So for most people it is too young and those children are more likely to experience a broken home and poverty. Not all of course.

I really wouldn't want my children to have children that young.

I was 24 when I gave birth to my first, I'm 25 now and have had my second. A few girls from my year in school have had babies by now, but less than 10. In the only one who went to uni that had had a child yet. None of my friends from uni are anywhere near the settling down stage.

I don't really care if people think it's too young - I live a very happy life, and we're doing well financially compared to my peers. My career will take longer to get going, but having time off to look after the children is also allowing me to do another degree in a field with much better career prospects than my first degree and my masters, so it's swings and roundabouts.

@underneaththeash do you have DC? How old were you when you had yours?

Think I was 23 when I had Dd. I’m now mid 40s with a 22yo. I love the fact that for the last few years I’ve had freedom to do what I want to do without having to be running round after a child all the time. I feel I have a new lease of life.

I have a very good job (went back to uni and studied for a second degree when Dd was 4yo). Me and dh are still together, have been together 25 years. Dd has finished uni with a 1st class degree. Having a child young is not all doom and gloom.

Was very young in my circles.
I had my third child a couple of days before my 25th birthday.
I’m now in my late 20’s and a lot of my friends my age are just now having their first. My other friends who already have kids are all older than me - mid to late 30’s 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'm going to be a mum soon and I'm 25. Mooost mums to be I know are a couple years older or outside my circle (forums etc) are a good 5 or more years older. I do know a couple of ladies who had their children in their early 20s.

Aside from that, most of my social circle who are 24/25 probably will have children in a few years - once they're married. I come from a culture where most girls get married by 25/26 and don't have children till after they're married.

So I feel relatively young as my closest friends do not have children. Even though I know I'm not really that young.

24/25 is a weird age, we only just feel like we grew up but not quite young enough to shock people that we are having a child lol!

Op not returning to the thread then??

It depends on your socioeconomic group. Unheard of in my son’s peer group - they’re all either still students, travelling or just starting their careers.

It's normal. I was 22 when I had my first.

I wouldn’t think of 24 as a young mum but I would say on the younger side of average. I was 26 when I first got pregnant (lost that pregnancy unfortunately) and 27 when I gave birth to my DS.
In our group of friends I’d say average is early 30’s. Me and DH were the youngest couple in our antenatal classes.