Advice on newborn sleep

[Sxp842]

Hi all, I’d be really grateful for some advice on getting my 5 week old to sleep! He was born at 37 weeks at 6lbs (2.7kg) and currently weighs 3.1kg and seems to only be putting on about 100g a week which I understand is less than he should be. He is also exclusively formula fed every 2 to 3 hours. I mention this because I’m not sure if it impacts on his sleep.

during the day he will sleep happily on me or in a sling, in the pram and in the car. He seems to like motion. Getting him to sleep isn’t usually a problem, The problem comes whenever we try to put him down into his Moses basket or next2me crib. He will wake up instantly or a few minutes later and start crying. I might be able to get him back to sleep for 10 minutes or so and then he’ll wake up. I’m constantly having to keep getting him back to sleep, so neither of us are sleeping well which I’m worried is affecting his weight. I don’t think he is getting the recommended 14 - 17 hours.

I’ve tried swaddling with the velcro blankets (but his little hands often pop out), warming his crib with a hot water bottle, white noise. That helps to an extent in getting him to sleep, but doesn’t help him to stay asleep once he goes in the crib.

I’m considering renting the snoo bassinet because I’m at my wits end. I tried cosleeping once but it didn’t really work because he wants to be on me, not near me. I think he does prefer the softer surface of the bed or blankets rather than his cot, but I don’t think it’s safe for him to sleep on soft surfaces?

any advice on what to try?

I would not try pace feeding without talking to your HV first, especially as it wasn’t recommended by your midwife. It definitely has it’s advantages for gassy babies and also if combi feeding but that doesn’t apply. However, given that your baby isn’t gaining weight quite as well as you’d like I’d be wary of doing anything that slows down his feeding without first talking to a HCP. But if bottles are being drained then I’d make an extra ounce going forward and see if he’ll take it, worse case scenario he isn’t hungry and there’s a bit of wastage.

Thanks, I’m seeing the health visitor later this week so I’ll ask her about pace feeding.

is it really important to get them to nap after every feed? There are times where he just doesn’t seem very tired and is quite alert, but if I put him in a sling he’ll fall asleep. Right now I’m focussing so much on feeding and sleeping that there isn’t much other playtime or tummy time going on, so not sure if I should be making the most of his alert periods or just focussing on getting him to sleep instead

Try winding for aaaages. Longer than you’d think. And different positions.

Both my DC settled best with cosleeping but they liked to be pressed right up against my body, stuffed into my armpit – I’d wriggle away once they were in a deep sleep and form the safe C shape around them but for settling, full-length contact was as good as being held.

It does pass. It’s awful but it passes.

Have a look at wake windows. At first they have short wake windows and do get overtired very easily which then means it can be difficult to get them to sleep and they are also more likely to wake up even if they are still tired.

So at your baby's age, it will be around 45-60 minutes give or take and as he gets to about 8 weeks (again, give or take) it should then stretch to more like 1-2 hours. You'll find the 'sweet spot' for your baby which means it should be easier for him to sleep because he isn't getting overtired and it can also help you structure the day a little should you wish so you can include tummy time and play.

At 5 weeks old mine (formula) fed about every 3-3.5 hours during the day. Wake windows are typically between 60 and 90 minutes so yes you would need a nap between each feed.

Me and @SouthLondonMum22 are on the same wavelength!

Only thing I'd add is I always followed eat - play - sleep rhythm.

Only ever fed to sleep at bedtime.

This means that they wake up rested, then you feed them so they're full and content, you then have a little awake time and you know that the next time they grumble it's because they're tired. Really takes the guess work out. Around 6 weeks is a great time to start.

Formula wise, I think mine was on 120ml 6x a day at 5 weeks and then once, maybe twice overnight. .

If he's guzzling the bottle add an Oz to the next feed.

We really are because I follow eat-play-sleep too. I agree that it takes the guess work out.

We did eat ‘play’ sleep too

I was in same situation as soon as I put my baby down into the cot she'd wake up in less then 2 minutes. I was doing the same as you did kept on getting her back to sleep. It was a never ending circle. She would just not sleep there. I was exhausted.

At 3 months she sleeps with me in the bed. I gave up on the cot completely. I tried everything, swaddling, dummy, made the surface softer, rocking the cot, shushing and patting down and leaving her to cry for a few minutes. Absolutely nothing would make her stay asleep in the cot. Once I put her into my bed and she slept almost throughout the night there was no going back.

Swaddling helped a lot in calming her down. Had the same problem she'd often broke her hands loose and kept on fussing with them until she woke up. Also until I swaddled her she wouldn't settle because of the hands. I used just an ordinary muslin and swaddled her tightly and she'd settle straight away and slept for hours.

It should get better from 6 weeks. It's the newborn stage. I've read that upto 3 months u can't really teach them any sleeping routine. One thing that really helped was listening to the baby's needs rather then people’s advice or Google. I started putting the baby to sleep only when I knew she's ready. At first she was going to sleep at night very late between 10pm-11pm. Now she's asleep by 7pm most days.

It's ok u pick up your baby everytime they cry. They can't selfsoothe at this age.

Newborn baby, OP. You’re doing fab. He’ll get there, it’s such early days. Ignore those around saying theirs slept thru for 48hrs from 3 days old. Newborns, babies and sleep wouldn’t be such a massive subject if it wasn’t usually the case of a lot of crappy nights. A lot. Maybe take a night about with DH? So you get alternate decent nights sleep