P1 Deferral (Scotland)

[Lillybank1]

Hi All, I have a little boy with a late December birthday, I have been tooing a frowing for months about whether to defer or not. I now need to make the decision on what to do. I just wondered is anyone else in the same boat? Is there any parents with children with earlier birthdays choosing to defer? Anyone overall thoughts and advice over what to do, I just don’t know what’s for the best 🙈

Contrary viewpoint - we have a mid Jan DS and an end Feb DD. Didn't defer either. DD was 4 when she started school, sat her highers at 16, nailed it which was good because she was miserable in school. So she left, worked for a year then went to uni in England at 17.5 and is thriving. If she'd been deferred she'd have had to stay in school til 17 to do her highers and that would not have been good for her, she needed to leave (ASD)

DS is 15 and doing prelims. Also academically smart but less motivated than his sister and has struggled with being physically smaller than his peers until the last 6 months when he has shot up and buffed up. I expect he'll leave at 16 and work for a year too. He's fine, someone has to be the tallest and someone has to be the smallest, but it is definitely an issue for the boys to be weedy compared to your early-puberty peers.

There's another DS, Sept birthday who plodded along and loved school and stayed for 6th year.

Really, it's a gamble. I don't think we should be given the choice, it's too hard to guess. However, I don't regret sending them and I know I'd have regretted imposing an extra year of academia on DD as school just doesn't suit everyone.

It's very normal to defer in Scotland so he won't be the only one in the same boat by any means and no one will be questioning why he's in that year. I work in a school and the dc don't notice who is what age as the teacher above says I'd always say defer if it's practical for you. Nothing really to lose and only really benefits to be had - older more mature going in to exams etc, not having to start uni and 17 when not even old enough to have a beer at the Union. Dd1 is a December birthday but the option was not there to defer then unless serious concerns. She'd 100% have benefited. Dd2 is mid feb and I did not even consider not deferring. Nursery encouraged me to send her but they are (were) encouraged to do that to free up spaces I think. I didn't . Like you said she'd have survived no problem going the year before but she's really thriving being one of the bigger fish in a small pond. She's a bit taller than some kids but the heights vary so much at these ages it certainly doesn't stand out. It's done wonders for her self confidence. I think the only potential draw back is in some team sorts done by birth year where he'll end up playing with kids in the year above but again, likely not to be the only one

Sorry just realised this is an old thread and you've made your decision long ago 🙈

I'd defer. I did with mine and never regretted it, rather than being the youngest and less mature they were the oldest and confident. From a professional point of view it's very easy to spot the young P1's and not all schools offer an immersive play experience so as you rightly say, the covid gaps could be left unaddressed.

@PTSDBarbiegirl you're right and this years p1's are the 'youngest' I've ever experienced in my years working in schools too. Few of them are ready for school imo even the older ones and we are playbased.

What about current friendships? There was a post recently from a dad in scotland who'd deferred their child last Yr & now regretting it as child is very unhappy being apart from his friends in school & not making friends with the much younger children now in nursery with him.
Most primaries are now doing pedagogical learning anyway, so very much play based & not expecting children to be sitting at desks all day as in past.
I know a few primary teachers who have said they'd a lot of p1 deferrals last Yr, will be interesting to see how this develops.

depends on your child. I didn’t have any born in dec onwards however am a Jan birthday myself and my mum wishes she could’ve deferred me. I think being older in year group is better tbh but I was a quiet shy thing and would have benefitted from another year in playgroup.

It's rare that dc all go to one school from one nursery anyway unless you live somewhere small or rural. Many of our school nursery dc will go to other schools and kids will come in to primary 1 from nurseries all over the city so friendships tend to be mixed up anyway

Doesn't this basically imply that the school is not child ready rather than the other way round?

I didn't defer mine and I have had my moments of worry but I feel good about the fact that she seems to be able to read now. That's opening up the whole world for her and she was so ready for that. In many ways she is immature, but she deserves the chance to read and write in an environment that meets her needs, with lots of play and care, and it seems like that's what she is getting. It is a good school though with a small class and a teaching assistant. Maybe in a less well resourced environment things would be different - so maybe that has to be part of the consideration too.

I haven’t experienced the same issues with friendships - my child had a great core group of friends who all went to school but were also at least 6 months older than him and all the kids went to a range of different schools. He has built brilliant new friendships with children both his age (also deferred) and some march/april/may birthday - who are actually closer to his age than the friends who he could’ve gone to school with in August. They definitely aren’t much younger (he is December born).
for us - it’s been the best decision. He is now so ready and thriving - he’s loved his extra year at nursery and the nursery have kept them all going at their own level. It’s maybe dependent on nursery and what the nursery offers to keep children at different stages well engaged.

We deferred our early Dec child, now 5. He is outgrowing nursery a bit but he has a peer group of 4 or so other children who are Dec-March babies & the nursery have been quite good about engaging them & challenging them.

For me, the main reason for deferring was to give him the extra year of maturity at the end of his school years, e.g. when sitting exams, leaving school, etc. Worth it for a possibly slightly boring 6 months at nursery.

Hiya my Dd is an adult now but she was a jan birthday and I wish I had deferred he,r but at the time her nursery and the infant teachers said she would be fine.

It was more of an emotional and social difference that was a concern especially in later primary and High school.

I think if you are umming and ahhing about it then maybe deferral is best, it isn't an easy decision.

We deferred, and so glad we did, my main reasons were i felt like he had missed out on lots of opportunities for social play through the COVID years and what harm would an extra years play do, he loves to play, he’s a very social boy who had zero interest in school or formal learning and just 6 months on he is so interested in learning he loves to do sums he is trying to recognise words in books and from this i know he will be so on it come next aug. He loves nursery, isnt bored at all but equally is now expressing excitement about school which just was not there this time last year. My other reasons being he’s feisty and bit boisterous and just felt maturing for another year before the expectations of classroom life were put on him. All in all glad we did it xx

huge weight off your mind extra year will do him no harm.