Things you wouldn’t have done before you were a parent

[Username721]

I genuinely would never have dreamed of going out in half the states I do now. Of course your priorities change when a child comes along but here we are!

Snot on my clothes? Baby wipe and go.

Hair last washed? Can’t remember.
Creme Egg for breakfast? Totally acceptable.
Ms Rachel? I see more of her than I do my friends.

Anything you would never have done before kids which is now totally acceptable to you?

Today I had a conversation about why we don’t put broccoli in our bottom.

Deff not something I went in for previously.

I've always been very careful about brushing my hair before leaving the house.

How times change haha

Wearing a rucksack and a sensible rain proof coat to go shopping. I'm that person now. I need to be dry with 2 free hands to deal with a toddler who likes splashy puddles!

Also, could watch the Paw Patrol by myself, as a choice. I used to hate cartoons (even as a kid) but I like Paw Patrol.

Caught someone else's sick in my hands 🤢🤢🤢🤢

Fished a poo out of the bath with my bare hands.

Used a snot sucker

Not be angry when someone woke me up for endless feeds 🤣

Peer at a bum hole, torch in hand, looking for worms....

I'd like to say "had a squirt of wee in my face" but I had a puppy before I had a child, and the puppy beat the child to it, so technically that was before I became a parent.

Been pathetically grateful for a lie in until 7am!

Sucked snot out of a nose

Run.
I have to chase my gremlin so much. I hate running but he makes me exercise 😂

Got my tits out in public.

Same

Think "eh" about having a drop of someone else's wee on my sleeve.

Regularly go to bed before 9 pm

Have sex randomly at like 2 am cause we both happen to be awake and it's the only chance we get

Encourage DH to get a vasectomy!

I started wearing massive pants after dc1 was born and never went back.

Many times I've continued cuddling the person who's vomiting on me.

Wiped another humans bum or clean up their vomit 🤮

Gone out without an umbrella - you can't hold an umbrella and push a heavy pram with two hands so I just get soaked and don't care.

Pre-baby I wouldn't be seen in public without make up on - now I only wear it at weekends.

Wear big pants - until I got pregnant I wore thongs, after I gave birth I discovered Grannie pants and never looked back. I don't wear bras anymore either, just those Lycra top things.

Wearing huge pants.

I only ever wore matching lacy underwear. How times have changed 🤣

Had baby wipes around the house - I was sooo right-on environmentally before I had a baby. We started out with cheeky wipes etc, but within 6 months they were in the back of the cupboard. The wipes we get are biodegradable so I kid myself that it's not so bad!!!

I'd never been pooped on, urinated on, vomited on or had bogies wiped on me before having kids, now I've lost count of the times.
Called 7am a lie in.
Called going to work 'a break.'
Stay in on consecutive evenings, I used to go out nearly every evening, now it's been literally years since I went out 😬
Got joy from cleaning and tidying
Gone to university, I thought it was a waste of money. But having kids made me want to set a good example and push myself to achieve new things.

Gone to a National Trust property at the weekend

Prop a phone up in front of a literal baby in a high chair so I can eat my dinner in a restaurant without her trying to climb out

Not as funny as the other replies but: I'm always amazed at how my pre-kid self would go to make a cup of tea ... and just hang around by the kettle waiting for it to boil. Maybe checking social media or just daydreaming. La la la.

Now I immediately take those 2-3 minutes to empty or stack the dishwasher, pop a load on, wipe surfaces, order something I forgot on Amazon, get children a drink/ snack etc.

I am incapable of not multitasking post-kids!

Ah, pregnancy days....

Walking into a room and taking my knickers off without being asked.
Also, when they stopped using the ultra sound wand UP the foof, and started doing abdominal scans instead, I STILL used to whip the nick nocks off through force of habit.
Then lying down on the clinical bed waiting for various strangers to stare at said foof.

I was having twins so I had more people down my nether end than when I was at Uni.