How much money do you need to earn for 3 kids? Really?

[Onemorequestionplz]

How much money to you need to earn to have 3 maybe even 4 kids ?

for simplicity, not london based, average mortgage and average expenses, no debts. Older dcs would be 30 funded hrs/ school age, both parents working.

how much do you think you need to earn?

@WelcomeTo5Below well if you have no housing costs, you are going to find it easier?!

Obviously I understand that was due to losing your parents and doesn't feel like a fortunate thing but housing is one of the biggest costs for most households

Something else that makes a difference is how your income splits between you.

If you both earn £50k that's quite tax efficient and you get tax free childcare and some child benefit.

If one of you earns a lot more than the other, it can be much less tax efficient.

We have a household income of around £170k but equally split between us so we still get tax free childcare but a couple where one person earned £150k and the other £20k would pay more tax and lose tax free childcare

I could raise quite a few kids keep them fed and clothed but every child you have money has to go further. I currently have cleaners , tutor which makes my life easier. My DD will have a gifted property which is hers to use a deposit or first home (she doesn't know this) she will have driving lessons , contribution towards a car and insurance contribution towards university. I will assist set her up as my parents never helped me with anything although she will have to earn a living and make a contribution she won't be given everything but I will give her the tools to succeed. I don't want to see her unnecessarily struggle if I had lots of children I couldn't afford to give all the kids the same amount as if I had 1 or 2. I'd only have a larger family if had millions in the bank and didn't need to work.

Well yes of course no housing costs makes a big difference but OP has said they already have a 4 bed which I presume was purchased before interest rates went crazy.

So unless they are mortgaged up to the max I think they can afford 3 children!

It's not necessary or even desirable to give your kids absolutely everything and for them to never want for anything. Learning to be grateful for what they have is also a valuable life lesson.

@WelcomeTo5Below I think you're the one not in the real world... The OP doesn't own it outright, she's paying off a mortgage like almost everyone and you don't get a lifetime interest rate, so she needs to be prepared for her rate to rise when her current deal expires

Does it not entirely depend on what you want to be able to give the children?

I'd say DS costs around 3k pcm after tax, so to do that for 3 you'd need around 110k spare per year. However, that encompasses an independent school and an eye wateringly expensive hobby, neither of which are necessary.

This is really enlightening about what parents have given/expect to give their kids when they’re older. Neither DH nor I got any help with uni or house deposit or any cash at all as adults. DH got driving lessons but I didn’t.

I hadn’t really thought about what we would do for our own kids but now think we should be putting away a bit more for them!

We have 2 atm and live in the south east. Combined income is more than double OPs. We are very comfortable atm but would probably need to move house and double our mortgage to stay in the same area and have a third. We have no family help and a nanny around here is c£2500/month. We’re thinking about it though.

I suppose it does, 3k per child to me, is over half of our household income and seems incredibly high. But I wouldn’t send my kids to private school and that obviously accounts for a huge portion of your cost of having a child

Some of these salaries here are astronomical, I must have made some wrong choices in life haha, seriously though those aren’t the norm and I think we’d be lucky to ever see those over the stretch of our careers.

yes we do have a mortgage on a 2% sort of rate that is due to end with htb no less but mortgage rates are coming down and inflation set to be back at the boe target 2% by 2025 so by then interest rates will return lower. Inflation is set to start significantly coming down by mid point this year, rates are currently 5 in a lot of places. Optimistic will be sub 4 by end of year. This is from the forecasters at my job (big bank, you’ve heard of them). As things are, our mortgage won’t double but it will increase top end to about 1200, so anything under that im considering a win. Sounds huge to Me, as under £1k is what I’m comfortable with but still affordable

The thread also underlines that, regardless of how much you have, it never feels quite enough!!

@Onemorequestionplz that's the whole point though really isn't it, that we all have different salaries and expectations for our kids. Only you know what your threshold is for your kids. There are plenty of people that will continue to have children despite relying on universal credit, there are a multitude of ways to raise kids, all that matters is how you want to raise yours.

Money is only one aspect as well of course, time is more important in my opinion when discussing the jump from 2 to 3, I wonder if I will be called out for living in a parallel universe for also having high expectations wanting to ensure my kids have enough 1 to 1 time with us so we can give them the emotional and educational support they need.

@Theelephantinthecastle so rude.

Anyway OP good luck whatever you decide

Absolutely! I think this is what I’m getting more than anything, it just never feels like enough, especially in light of having children.

after all the university talk I googled how much parents are expected to support their kids and for our salary which is about £66 household it’s close to £6k per year, whilst of course you put away for your kids it’s incredibly high. I feel like for a lot of this generations kids moving away to uni will become a luxury as few would be able to support £6k per year, especially when saving for old age/ care fees etc. Hopefully something changed in the higher education sector

It's incredibly sad and will have a real impact on social mobility. I benefitted from free uni fees but I probably wouldn't have had the opportunity if my parents had had to pay 6k per year each for me and my sister.

This is a long way off for you though and who knows what the education landscape will look like then. Also I know many students will be working alongside studying (which always happened to be fair). In your shoes I would consider the time consideration of having another child as I think you are in a pretty comfortable position now money wise.

Time is a massive factor. I could work full-time instead of part time. That would enable us to afford a third child. That would be quite the sacrifice for the other two in terms of attention and parental input. I don't want to spend weekends doing chores and not doing as much in the way of fun activity, or rushing through homework and having less time to make home cooked food etc. Our family time is too precious to sacrifice for another baby.

www.jrf.org.uk/report/minimum-income-standard-uk-2022

This makes an interesting read.

We have a combined income of about 60k, 1300 per month mortgage on a 2 bed end terrace, south east, DD in nursery (no free hours yet). I wouldn’t like to try to afford more than one child.

Well I only have one child (almost 2) and I've never totted up what he costs but we spent €3900 a month before he was born and now we spend €4200 a month....I put that down to cost of living increases more than the cost of my son though.

We also get the €140 a month in child benefit now, that goes into a investment fund for college/his future.

Free childcare from my parents who absolutely refuse to take money and would be offended if we paid someone else to mind him. This goes a long long way to making children affordable.

I'm down around €300 a month in lost earning due to taking parental leave and reducing my hours by 3 days a month but that's great, so worthwhile and I would have done that with no children if it had been an option.

If we had 2 more children.....we probably would need a bigger car although I guess we'd cope with our current one if needed. Housewise, we have a 4 bedroom house so wouldn't have to move but I'd like more space and a bigger garden.

I get full pay for my entire maternity leave so that isn't a consideration.

Our combined income is €136k plus another 45k a year between bonus and stock options. There's also the €1680 a year in child benefit. I'd feel comfortable financially with having 2 more children in our current circumstances. If we had to pay for childcare then it would be tight and require some lifestyle changes.

I’m on £80k and i only have two. I couldn’t afford to have more because i want to give the best for my kids. I want to bring them all to see the world and i want to helps them to claim property ladder later on, as you know house price is crazy. So we decided to have only 2, but hopefully very content and happy boys.