Words your kids have copied after hearing you say them.

[avenanap]

"bollocks". Age 2.

ds used to copy us swearing all the time (hes 3.1) but now hes knows those wordsarnt for children, so he replaces the word with the word 'Onk' now.
No, i dont know wnhat it means, its a word hes made up.

ohh, that's sweet.

my dd2 came out with 'that will damage my self esteem mum' .......

my favourite sweary story (told before on mn)

dd (in bath, aged 2 or 3): fuck
dh: no, don;t say that
dd: fuck
dh: no that's not a nice word
dd: fuck
dh: if you say that again I'm going to put you straight in bed without a story
dd (after long pause): shit

my favourite non-sweary but innappropriate word use - dd, again aged about 3, watching her younger sister crawl out of the bedroom and into the bathroom "mum quick, dd2's ^plummeting" into the bathroom".

mumzyof2 - you've just reminded me dd1 made up her own word. it was her word of frustration/rebellion - when backed into a corner such that she had to comply with the adult request although she really didn;t want to she would always say "pleh". totally made up, but seemed to serve a purpose

When DS was about 2.5 we were in the car and I had to slam on the brakes cos some idiot had pulled out in front of me. Cue "wanker" at the top of his voice through the open window.

Didn't let him in the car with DH for about 6 months after that one!

My friend was babysitting for her neice (3.5) letting her try on the lippy, heels, etc.

She was apparently parading round the house asking "where's my fucking handbag!"

Her sil was apparently but the lo MUST have heard it from somewhere to use it in the correct context.

That's a good one. These children are very impressive.

"For Gods sake mummy - that is the end of the chat!"

Said with great exasperation by dd2 when she was around 3yo

DD (age21mo at the time)
dropped cup in the back of granny's car
DD : , "oh, bollocks"
mummy dies laughing ...silently
granny pretends to be deaf

DS2 (age 2, sitting in trolley being pushed by DH)
DH drops keys - mutters almost silently "bugger"
DS2 [sings] "the daddies on the bus go bugger bugger bugger, ..(the whole verse)"

ds (about 2.5): mummy. This bath is BLEEDING hot. it's so hot it makes me bleed.

After being nearly hit at a junction by a complete div pot, I exclaimed loudly 'TOSSER!'
It made me feel slightly better,
However after 10 minutes of the word being repeated until we arrived home by my 2 yr old, it wasn't so funny.
tosser tosser tosser tosser tosser......

At least they didn't say it to the woman working in the shop!

On my mum discovering I had sent round 2 odd socks for dd1 'for fuk sake 2 odd bloody socks', dd1 - while covering her mouth 'oh for fuk sake' obviously knew it was wrong hence covering her mouth! She was about 2 at the time.

dd said 'oh bollocks' when she was 2 and helping me peg out the washing and she dropped the peg bucket

once in the car, someone pulled out in front of us, dh started gesturing at them, and dd said 'what a knobhead'

Haaa, I bet that one went down well!

dd aged 2 'Hanky panky' over and over again the other morning, when dh foolishly said 'here's your hanky. Hanky panky. Oops, better not say that!'
Doh!

'farking car' (as it failed to start again)

'damage' (I think from 'dammit')

Ds1 doesn't speak very clearly yet. Naturally the only word he can say as clear as a bell is "Bloody" . If he gets very cross: "Dd2. Stop It. Bloody."

Dd2 aged 5, after a slightly stressful journey to my mum's house for Sunday lunch, and during a pause in the conversation, "daddy, why did you call that man an arsehole and do this [you can imagine the actions] with your fingers?"

ds was listening to dh explaining something (dh has a tendancy to waffle) he listened for a while then said
"spit it out"

hahaha

dd came out with 'mind your horses' this morning, I think it comes from me telling her to 'hold your horses'(to wait or slow down) Must have picked that one up from my mum..............

DS heard another child's dad say "That's a cracking idea" the day before we went to stay with my parents in Ireland. It made my family and friends PTSL when they heard it as he sounded like he had just stepped out of a Famous Five book.

'bloody' ............. insert any word you want!

'you numpty'

Yesterday we went out with one of my son's six year old friends to a children's farm. The six year old friend was a bit silly. He chased a cockeral around the farm and shouted "cock-a-doodle-doo". My son was not impressed

A: J, How old are you?
J: six.
A: Well, I'm really disappointed by your behaviour today. Chasing the poor bird is a horrible thing to do. I EXPECT you to ACT like a SIX year old, NOT a THREE year old!

I wonder where my son has heard that?

GD was watching a film with ds & dil, one of the actors said motherfucker, ds & dil looked at each other then at gd, who said in a very grown up voice, oh it's okay grandma says that all the time. I don't