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Parenting

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Original poster

Football in the garden

77 replies

AliceR1 · 19/02/2023 19:18

My kids, 8 and 11, are into football. Neighbour always used to throw balls back over the fence but recently started hogging them so I went round to collect - he got really stroppy - I deliberately have the goal away from the fence to stop the ball hitting the fence (my fence, merely to stop the noise) so any ball flying over the fence from now on is a complete no-no… I came up with a plan to erect a frame with a net which I’m planning on building up to 3 metres which should stop anything going over… I know the regs stipulate fence being no more 2 metres tall. It’s all going to be neat, uniform colour, black… where do I stand if he kicks off about that? Just so I’m prepared lol

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

WiIson · 19/02/2023 22:15

You can put the big 'stop ball' net up op as it's portable and you can fold it back down when you don't need it. That will stop the balls going over and the neighbours moaning about it. Job done. I have one.

Snugglemonkey · 19/02/2023 22:17

AliceR1 · 19/02/2023 20:01

should an 8yo be banned from playing footy in the garden, I think not…

yes if they can’t keep the ball in their own garden.

Well that told me… thanks. Just what I needed just as I’ve just picked up DH’s ashes from the undertakers.

Seriously. That is rubbish for you, I am so sorry for your loss.

It has zero to do with the football thing. No, your kid should not be playing football in your garden if it is a menace to others. There are few circumstances when it is not.

WiIson · 19/02/2023 22:19

If you can stop the balls going over / hitting the fence, (and you will be able to with a net), then I'd just carry on as you are op, and let the kids play football in the garden.

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Overthebow · 19/02/2023 22:20

AliceR1 · 19/02/2023 20:01

should an 8yo be banned from playing footy in the garden, I think not…

yes if they can’t keep the ball in their own garden.

Well that told me… thanks. Just what I needed just as I’ve just picked up DH’s ashes from the undertakers.

Sorry for your loss, but what’s that got to do with your kids kicking balls into your neighbours garden?

XanaduKira · 19/02/2023 22:22

baxterstockman · 19/02/2023 20:11

God ignore the miserable arseholes on this thread! Do people prefer kids to be inside on video games getting fat, with no social skills? I think what you are planning is more than fair. Where I live kids play in gardens and out in the road and on a grass patch at the end. Does this cause noise? Yes. Does it sometimes cause balls to come in my garden? Yes. Can I manage this minor inconvenience and remember that I played out or in my garden and did these things as a kid? Yes. Balls coming in to your garden makes your life miserable? Fucking hell! Get some perspective.

I agree with this completely!

Overthebow · 19/02/2023 22:24

Do people prefer kids to be inside on video games getting fat, with no social skills?

there are many things to do which aren’t playing video games or playing football. There’s many activities to do in a garden that don’t annoy neighbours. If balls can’t be kept in the garden then they should at the park instead.

Original poster

AliceR1 · 19/02/2023 22:24

Overthebow · 19/02/2023 22:20

Sorry for your loss, but what’s that got to do with your kids kicking balls into your neighbours garden?

Show quote history

Nothing apart from the fact that I’m a one man band with no family, full time job, home to run and can’t run back and forth to the park with the kids as often as I’d like to. And for the record, his lifestyle choice didn’t render him to be in the risk category for a cardiac arrest.

OP posts:

StillWantingADog · 19/02/2023 22:32

Sorry for your loss

while i can see it could be annoying for neighbours especially if the balls land on flowerbeds essentially yes children should within reason be allowed to play football in their own garden and as a single working parent of course it’s not practical to take them to park every day

hopefully you can smooth things over with the neighbour

converseandjeans · 19/02/2023 23:41

@AliceR1

Nothing apart from the fact that I’m a one man band with no family, full time job, home to run and can’t run back and forth to the park with the kids as often as I’d like to.

I think you're getting a really hard time on here! It must be hard keeping going as it is without everyone having a go.

Ready2020 · 19/02/2023 23:47

I'd much rather deal with a few footballs being kicked into the garden than the constant banging of a football off our fence by the child's dad. Our neighbours child is 3 years old and the dad regularly encourages his child to bash our fence. So it could be much worse for your neighbours.

I'm actively hoping our neighbours move.

Ghostbuster2639 · 20/02/2023 01:07

It doesn’t matter what their garden is like. Missiles from your garden shouldn’t be going into his garden and you have no right to assign him the job of dealing with them.

What some parents don’t understand is that collecting these balls becomes a job. Another adult is disturbed in their home and has to stop what they’re doing and answer the door and put their shoes on and go outside and collect these balls. Or they have to go round their garden collecting them.

You’ve had the inconvenience once op of having to put yourself out to go and get these balls and you’re pissed off. Imagine how he feels.

My ex neighbours used to call me ratty or miserable because I didn’t want to be disturbed 4 or 5 times a day to return their kids balls on demand. Never mind the fact I was in the bath, or feeding the baby, or enjoying my dinner, the expectation is that these balls be returned right now.

I put a stop to it by telling the kids that I was busy and to send a parent round to get it later. Funnily enough the parents who thought I had nothing better to do than run after balls all day wasn’t quite so keen to do that themselves. Funny that.

The fact is that you’ve been quite happy for him to be acting as a skivvy with these balls. And until you went round you had no idea if he had a greenhouse or lots of plants or a rabbit in a cage. You’re only doing something about it now because you’ve been inconvenienced yourself.

Original poster

AliceR1 · 20/02/2023 06:51

converseandjeans · 19/02/2023 23:41

@AliceR1

Nothing apart from the fact that I’m a one man band with no family, full time job, home to run and can’t run back and forth to the park with the kids as often as I’d like to.

I think you're getting a really hard time on here! It must be hard keeping going as it is without everyone having a go.

In a nutshell, and thank you x

OP posts:

Brefugee · 20/02/2023 10:48

I'm sorry for your loss OP.
But that doesn't change the PITA it is for your neighbour.

I got a load of balls and stuff in my garden over the last year or so. Ruined my bulbs, flowers, flower beds.
So i kept the balls and when they came round to get them "wah wah they're expensive") i asked them for 50 euros to replace my flowers etc. They didn't want to pay so i still have the balls. But no more come over.

Soapyspuds · 20/02/2023 12:43

Normally it’s one, absolute max two a week. Three this week because they’ve been out there more because of half term

I was expecting you to say several time per day. I do not think that is a problem at all as long as the kids are not expecting the neighbour to throw them back right away. When I was a kid my brother was told that when the ball goes over that is the end of the game until the neighbour throws it back of an evening.

StrangeSally · 09/05/2023 20:45

OP DON'T ignore the ' miserable sods' on here I currently have my ndn kid kicking a football in their miniscule fucking garden bang next t o our miniscule fucking garden Thu mp thump fucking thump, while I try to concentrate on the telly, not a fucking chance, pissoff to th park with your bastard football

StewardsonG · 02/06/2024 08:41

We have had issue with the next door neighbours since 2021, they have twin boys now 13, their balls kept coming over and i have tortoises and told them to stop, their dad had a rant about everything else in our garden avoiding the issue. We wouldn’t give the balls back when they kept coming to our door to ask for the balls, as it was agreed with the father for him to come round so he knew how often they were coming over. they never did tell there father and we have loads of balls, he then put up a plastic net fence, which didn’t stop them. it kicked off again last week when another ball came over
and one of the twins friends came round and asked for the ball back, we told him what was agreed and then the father came round agressively. the balls are always being kicked against the joint fence and ruining it also pudding us off with the noise. we paid half. sick of the noise. and now he has purposely put a boxing thing against the fence and told them to hit it towards the fence, this is being done purposely.

so all those out their agreeing with the parents of the kids with the balls, have respect for the other side of the issue

StewardsonG · 02/06/2024 08:42

i feel your pain, people are so selfish 😢

StewardsonG · 02/06/2024 08:45

neighbours moaning about it!!! you ought to be ‘the neighbour’ having to put up with the noise, kids next door are now 13 and their tool if a parent is encouraging them

Heffapotamus · 02/06/2024 08:59

The kids next door (tiny gardens) have destroyed my plants this year with balls coming over. I'd love it if they put up a net - or frankly just went to the park 50 yards away.
What's even worse is that they always send a friend to get the balls back. Zero accountability totally backed up by their parents.
Oh and they scream. Whenever they are in the garden they scream - not shouting, no words, just screaming- and they are not ND.

Cattery · 02/06/2024 10:31

StrangeSally · 09/05/2023 20:45

Love it. Nothing worse than the thump, thump, thump. Kids can’t control a ball.

OMGsamesame · 02/06/2024 10:35

AliceR1 · 19/02/2023 20:26

That’s what I had in mind. Thanks for the kind replies. I just think that banning a kid from kicking a ball in the garden is a bit off. It’s an estate with families, in the vicinity of primary school and I’m just trying to be reasonable… no intention falling out with anyone. Never play music outside, kids never out before 9am or after 8pm.

Show quote history

Talk to your neighbour about it.

Explain what you're trying to do (avoid the ball going into your garden) and see if they are OK with that.
(They're not "hogging" the balls just because they don't throw them back in the timeframe you'd prefer).

When did we lose the ability to converse reasonably like grown-ups?

StewardsonG · 02/06/2024 12:40

these are kids. who are on a football team, so they have experience, just antagonising us all the time

TraitorsGate · 02/06/2024 12:50

Can you position the goal post somewhere else apart from the fence, even with a high net they will still be aiming in the same direction and may miss. Could you put the goal up against your back wall, that way it won't affect any neighbours.

LemonBalonz · 21/08/2024 18:33

Nightmare!!! neighbours got football pitch in the garden . Inviting colleagues to play with them . Ongoing constants football sound make me and our family stressed. We are not able to enjoy our garden at all as they are always playing football. Sounds of banging panels and play until 10 pm somethines! Nightmare!!! Waiting until they grow up but firstly I will loose my mind:/

Otherstories2002 · 21/08/2024 19:38

He’s not hogging the balls. Your kids are being a pain. Simple.

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