Scared to take my baby back to hospital but I’m also scared not to..

[poppyt1998]

It sounds stupid but I’m scared to take my baby back to the hospital.
This is why.

he is 7 months old, he lost his balance while sitting and he hit his soft spot on a wooden footrest at the end of the bed. It was impossible for him to fall off, I had just looked away for a few seconds and then that happened

I took him in and they examined him, they sent us home. 24 hours later he had a firm, raised soft spot. I took him back in and we were there 9 hours, somehow one of the nurses misconstrued me and thought he fell off the bed, I corrected her and I thought nothing of it. Anyway, several doctors, nurses and a paediatrician agreed it was ok to send him home considering he’s normal, no sign of anything.

I got a phone call the next day from social services.. that nurse had reported me. They said they were going to do a wellness check because apparently I had “two different stories” and the social worker thought he had fell off the bed. I corrected her, she went back and phoned the hospital and the hospital looked into it, found out I was linear and truthful with my explanation (🙄obviously) and social services decided to close the case off the basis of “the hospital got it wrong, i was telling the truth and baby was fine and discharged by the hospital so there’s no reason for socials to get involved”

BUT that’s what worries me, right there. he is fine, but his soft spot is still firm and raised and I’m an anxious person and I’d like to take him back and demand a scan so that my mind could be put at ease . My biggest fear is something happening to him.

But my worry is if I take him back to hospital, would social services get back in touch? I’m a massive overthinker and an excessive worrier so I may be overthinking this but I’d love some input.

Are you sure it's his soft spot rather than just a normal 'bump' from where he banged it?

That was then, now you think there's still an issue and you're not even contacting them to query it. You could just call them and get advice.

It’s actually pretty difficult to remove a child from their family, no matter how crap the family is.
There are rigorous processes to adhere to and parents have to be given reasonable chances to make changes, and rightfully so.
No one is going to take him away for one head bump.

agree calling the ward for advice is a good idea. I doubt they’ll need to see him again if nothing has changed and he’s well in himself.

If you are at all worried about your baby, take him to see a doctor. SS don’t just swoop in and remove kids (look at poor baby Sky, Arthur and all those other poor kiddies). A simple welfare check would show that your baby is loved and well cared for.

@Crumpledstilstkin i phoned the ward about 20 minutes ago and i spoke to the registrar and she asked if there’s been anything different, to which I told her no, and then I told her his soft spot is still firm and she wasn’t concerned at all. She just told me to attend the health visitor appointment next week so they can measure his head. That’s it

@legalseagull definitely his soft spot. All the doctors had a feel and they said it’s firm and raised.

it’s not a goose egg.

If you take him back, you are more likely to be referred again due to your overwhelming health anxiety. Demanding unwarranted medical procedures to ease your own anxiety will meet the threshold for a chat with social services.
You need to seek some help for your anxiety before it affects your child.

@Patineur i have phoned them already.. I told them the soft spot is still raised and firm and they didn’t seem concerned at all

@Jojobees um. I’m a first time mom who has no experience with kids whatsoever, I just go off what google says. Google says it’s a medical emergency if a soft spot is raised/firm/bulging

my anxiety won’t affect my child thanks. I’d rather him go through scans and make sure he’s ok than to find out one day that he should’ve had scans.

OP, I have health anxiety when it comes to my DD too and it’s only got worse since her Dad died suddenly. She’s been to A&E way too many times and they’ve never been anything other than kind and happy to see her.

A phone call from SS after a head injury in an under 5 is standard practice. I’ve had it twice. Don’t worry about it at all.

@Jojobees the only reasons why a soft spot is raised after a head bump is either fluid on the brain or brain swelling. So tell me why I shouldn’t be anxious?!
I have that doubt in my mind that the drs missed something.
my child is safe with me. He is well looked after and you’re acting as if it’s concerning that im anxious for him.. it’s more concerning if I didn’t give the tiniest s**t!

@peachgreen im so sorry for your loss.

it’s only natural to worry about these babies

it is good to hear it’s not only me though because I kinda took it personally

As you are so fond of Dr Google, why don’t you Google early outcomes for children who have a parent with severe health related anxiety, and then come back and say it won’t affect your child.
Google also tells me that my child who’s hands are cold has sepsis…. he doesn’t he’s been outside with no gloves.

You child has been seen twice by several very qualified professionals, they are not concerned, have attempted to reassure you he is fine. But yet you still require more… what if they scan him, and the firm fontanelle is still there? Exploratory surgery? Where does it end.

I say this kindly, please get some help with your anxiety.

I'm sorry you're worried OP - but I do think this is your anxiety talking rather than a missed diagnosis by the health professionals.

Maybe it helps to know that babies soft spots actually close by the time they are 18 months - so the bump is almost certainly just a reaction to a gentle bang as opposed to a swelling in the brain.

Hope you feel calmer soon.

Op it sounds like you have pretty severe post natal anxiety/depression and you really need to make an urgent drs appointment for yourself tomorrow.

Your anxiety will rub off on your child whether you believe it or not. Google is the worst thing to do in regards to anything health related, its literally millions of websites written by absolutely anyone about anything not everything can be trusted on there, in fact drs generally hate it when a patient comes in and says "i googled this".

Its been 4 days. Ds is fine. He has had multiple professionals look him over and declare he is ok. You as his mother haven't noticed any change in him. Sometimes babys get bumps and it can take weeks to go down, i banged my head right on the temple as a baby and ended up with a lump for two years.

Anxiety is awful, i suffer gad and ocd so sympathise with you. Please get yourself seen.

@Jojobees and I say this kindly, but any normal parent would be concerned after a young baby hit their soft spot, then had a swollen soft spot days later.
doctors can get things wrong. Even the doctor said he doesn’t know why it’s happened.. how is that reassuring? If he had a scan, I know for certain there would be no damage/fluid/bleed and that would be the end of it.

why do you think I’ve got health anxiety? Where the hell have you got that from? You don’t know me, don’t diagnose me.

This can't be true - thousands of accidents every single day. Bumps, falls, trips, burns - there just can't be a call for every one?

@AutumnScream its not a goose egg, it’s actually his soft spot that is swollen and hard. The doctor said he has no clue why it’s happened, which isn’t very reassuring. There’s not one thing online that says a swollen soft spot after a head bump is normal. My anxiety is completely rational in this situation, each day that goes by I get less anxious

Because it’s been 4 days.

if your child did have brain swelling, or any other sever head injury, it would be very clear by now and he would be seriously unwell. You wouldn’t be dithering, you would be in hospital.

sometimes what would be abnormal in most, is completely normal in others.

You literally state it in your op. That’s where I got it from. You said it yourself.

Any admission to hospital involving young children triggers SS referral.

Would you prefer they not be involved when so many babies and kids are harmed.

Any admission to hospital involving young children triggers SS referral.

Would you prefer they not be involved when so many babies and kids are harmed.

@Jojobees i mean I’m anxious as in worried. Not anxious as in I have an anxiety disorder, because I don’t. I wasn’t that worried when he hit his head, it was only when his soft spot had raised and got firmer I started to panic

But your child has been assessed and you've been told he's fine. His condition hasn't changed so most parents would be happy with that. He's bumped his head, it happens, so it's likely to be scalp swelling from any bump, rather than brain bruising.

Plus I wouldn't want any child of mine to have a CT scan with the associated radiation dose which can cause cancer long term rather than being reassured by the medical professionals who have told me it's ok! Twice! They will do CT rather than ultrasound in case of trauma.

Your child will be affected by your anxiety so try to relax or seek help with it.

If you are concerned about the continuing bulge in the soft spot, I think the best thing to do is call 111 and ask for them to sign post to the appropriate place. Explain truthfully the timeline - when you went to the hospital etc.