Should we get rid of the TV?

[knickerelasticjones]

Let me at the outset say that I'm not at all somebody who is vehemently opposed to TV per se - but due to our DD1 both DH and I are now seriously considering getting rid of the TV for good (or at least for several years).

DD1 (nearly 3) just LOVES tv. She asks to watch it constantly and always cries and moans when it is turned off. If I am stuck at home with her all day (waiting for plumbers etc) it is a constant battle to get her to do other things. The problem is that at the moment she WON'T play with her toys / paint / read / do anything much apart from ask from TV.

Actually that's not true - she will play with her toys happily first thing in the morning (before 9am) and last thing at night (after 5.30) as she knows she NEVER gets TV at these times. When we've been on holiday and there is no TV, there is no problem!

I know that the logical thing would just be to limit her TV to 30 mins a day, but I feel that I will spend my entire time battling with her desperately trying to get her to do other things, and if we have a bad day I might just succumb and turn the TV back on.

What do you think?

Are we being too draconian? Or will we be glad we got rid and never look back?

DVDs and computers are exactly the same if not worse than TV IMHO. A DVD goes on far longer churning out the same drival. I adore our Charlie & Lola DVD but don't see how it is any better than the TV show. At least with TV after 15 mins it ends and something fresh comes on.

I read something somewhere that gazing at a computer is far worse than watching TV as they are sitting so close, it is just as addictive and can make you feel sick if you're on for too long(I should know . Even radio racket in the background can irritate after a while

If you're going to ban TV, DVDs, radio and computer ok but I don't see how getting rid of just 1 is going to have any benefits. There are so many fab shows, DVDs,websites out there I think it would be a shame to ban any totally. A week has many hours in it, 84 day hours to be exact, 2 hours a day even is only 14 out of the 84, 1 only 7. If the rest of those hours are filled with varied activities I am currently wondering if it can really be that bad. I think if a child was watching it all day then obviously it would be a problem but then doing anything for too much isn't good.

I didn't have a tv until quite old and can remember playing with toys for hours, mine manage 1/2 an hour max and then they want something different, they are only 3 and 4(maybe I was the same at that age). Is this due to their tv watching I don't know? I guess only time will tell. DP had it on all the time as a child and his powers of concentration are far better than mine which is quite interesting.

I have to be honest I let mine watch in excess of 2 hours sometimes but it's for me when I need the help to get things done. They never nag or ask but then I'm a mean old bag so they know nagging of any description gets them nowhere. They have a full day with lots of varied activities and I think that is the key that and quality shows. I am going to try and get it down to an hour a day next week, then I'm going to draw a line under worrying about it (she says). Can you not just tell them the times and shows they are allowed to watch it and stick to it?

We never got round to getting a TV for the first 10 years of our marriage. Not for any very strongly felt reasons, we literally never got round to trotting down to the shops until dd was 7 and ds 4. And even now, we only really use it to watch DVDs. I suppose that probably is a bit weird but one thing it hasn't done:

it hasn't turned dc's into social recluses with no ability to sustain a conversation with their peers

For one thing, they can always watch round their mates. For another thing, they can always talk about other things. For a third, all their mates are equally embarrassed about the annoying quirks of their particular families.

I also have to say that dh and I haven't got noticeably less weird (ask dd!!!) since we did go out and invest in a box. Tbh this seems a bit of a non-issue as far as we're concerned. I've had no problems regulating TV-watching post-acquisition and there were no problems with keeping the family going pre-acquisition. Agree that computers and DS's can get just as addictive as TV's; I just wouldn't let anybody else decide which particular gadgets we indulge in as a family.

Agreed that "feeling left out when they get to school" is totally not an issue. Kids TV is so diverse these days that they don't all watch the same stuff anyway. Not like when we were kids and were all watching the same one or two channels.

We have no TV, but use iPlayer and DVDs. Our girls are 2.5 and 5.5. They often watch a screen for half an hour or so while I'm cooking. If they watch much more than that, they get stroppy and argumentative. We have LOTS of craft stuff.

DD1 is in Year 1 and is very good at playing Power Rangers with the boys despite the fact she's never, ever seen it and hasn't a clue what they really are.

Message withdrawn

thanks for all those who have given us their experiences - thought I'd update you on what we've decided.

We're not going to get rid of the TV (or not yet at any rate) but we are restricting DDs viewing to 30 mins a day from 5-5.30ish. This is when I prepare the evening meal and is often a time when she is really tired and really appreciates the 'down time' TV provides.

In some ways I feel much better after reading your posts as I realise when I said TV I was really referring to screen time. Our DD is only ever allowed to watch Cbeebies or DVDs. And she only has a small selection of carefully chosen DVDs.

My main concern is that if she is watching TV she is watching a particular programme (i.e. 'lets switch on to watch numberjacks as you really like that'), as opposed to switching on the TV to veg out to anything that happens to be on. (OK, if it Cbeebies it's going to be something pretty inoffensive, but it is still her using TV just to mentally switch off).

And DH and I have just decided that we won't switch it on in the evening unless there is something we really, really fancy (CSI:NY clearly, in my case).

Should add that DD didn't watch anything today - perhaps she has some psychic way of knowing that I've been posting about her on mumsnet.....

thanks one and all!

sorry haven't had time to read all posts but just wanted to say that when we first got married we put our TV in the spare room as we thought that if it was in a lounge we would probably end up watching it all the time and not talking to each other (we wanted to try and start our marriage with good precedents young love!). It was great though because we didnt ever really want to go and hang out in the spare room unless we really wanted to watch something, so our viewing wasn't mindless.
Now we have moved and put the tv in the lounge as i knew bf would get a bit dull otherwise! But now we have a ds who is 14 mo and fascinated by the tv (too fascinated) and we wonder if we should do something similar but dont really have a spare room any more! Anyway, good on you if you do take it away, i reckon it will be a good thing

for gods sake, just pull the plug from the wall, hide the remotes. WHATEVER IT TAKES! Youre the boss. If they tantrum so what? They'll stop when you don't do anything about it.