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Original poster

So fast asleep that I didn’t wake up with everyone knocking?

85 replies

dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:01

I have a 6 week old and I’ve been getting less sleep although not that less last night. Something really weird just happened. I cosleep with baby (safely), we both fell asleep 2 hours ago, baby woke up crying and I didn’t wake up as I didn’t hear him. My brother from the other room heard him crying and came knocking on my bedroom door which was locked, I still didn’t wake up. Some other people too came knocking I didn’t hear. I woke up mins later and many missed calls later. I have no idea how this just happened. And honestly I’m so worried. My family are so scared that I had fainted or something but I hadn’t. I don’t know what to do I’m so scared and feeling so.. weird about what just happened. I’m never such a heavy sleeper that I wouldn’t wake up after all this.

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toomuchlaundry · 09/12/2022 18:33

Do you live with family, was wondering why you lock your bedroom door?

Spacebears · 09/12/2022 18:33

I co-slept too but any little noise she made I woke up(always been a light sleeper). I feel for you because you're probably so exhausted but I wouldn't co sleep going forward, it's much safer for baby to be in his/her bed if this happens again. How do you know you won't accidentally roll on baby? Of if baby becomes tangled in the sheets you won't hear them cry. Be careful.

toomuchlaundry · 09/12/2022 18:33

Have you been taking any medication?

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Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:33

toomuchlaundry · 09/12/2022 18:33

Do you live with family, was wondering why you lock your bedroom door?

Yes and I’ve always had a habit to lock my door

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Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:34

Spacebears · 09/12/2022 18:33

I co-slept too but any little noise she made I woke up(always been a light sleeper). I feel for you because you're probably so exhausted but I wouldn't co sleep going forward, it's much safer for baby to be in his/her bed if this happens again. How do you know you won't accidentally roll on baby? Of if baby becomes tangled in the sheets you won't hear them cry. Be careful.

I too have always been a light sleeper, that’s why I’m so upset and worried and I can’t stop crying. I’m telling DH that I shouldn’t ever be home alone with baby because I don’t trust myself and at the same time I’m thinking what on earth is wrong with me

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SeemsSoUnfair · 09/12/2022 18:35

are your dh, dbro and "other people" helping with the baby so you can get some rest. you sound exhausted.

why was the bedroom door locked in your family home with you and a baby locked in? that and the poor cosleeping arrangements/decisions makes me think you are so exhausted you need more support. tell them they need to step up and help.

Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:35

toomuchlaundry · 09/12/2022 18:33

Have you been taking any medication?

Nope

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Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:36

SeemsSoUnfair · 09/12/2022 18:35

are your dh, dbro and "other people" helping with the baby so you can get some rest. you sound exhausted.

why was the bedroom door locked in your family home with you and a baby locked in? that and the poor cosleeping arrangements/decisions makes me think you are so exhausted you need more support. tell them they need to step up and help.

Everyone is honestly helping so much, my husband was actually at work when all this happened about to come back. Baby was actually with my family before this, for most the day. I brought him upstairs to make him sleep because he was awake for 3-4 hours and I locked the door without thinking (also because I breastfeed and I don’t do it in front of my brother or FIL although this may sound weird)

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Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:38

I didn’t want to cosleep either before he was born but I honestly didn’t know what else to do because baby would sleep nowhere else. Either on my bed or in my arms, that’s it. Or DH’s arms but he wasn’t home. I’m probably making no sense right now 😭

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Spacebears · 09/12/2022 18:40

I very much doubt there's anything wrong with you. You're just a sleep deprived mum to a newborn. Don't worry about it too much. Going forward don't sleep with baby and make sure you utilise all the help you have around you. Get some rest without baby while you can. It will get easier Flowers

bumpytrumpy · 09/12/2022 18:40

dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:32

Would it definitely have been because of exhaustion? Or something else? Sorry that I keep asking even though you guys probably wouldn’t know 😭😭

No one can possible know. It's certainly unusual not to be woken by your own crying baby. A trip to GP wouldn't hurt.

You DH needs to help in the night and make sure the baby is safe in cot after feeds

toomuchlaundry · 09/12/2022 18:40

Have you been ill which might make you more exhausted than normal?

Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:40

Spacebears · 09/12/2022 18:40

I very much doubt there's anything wrong with you. You're just a sleep deprived mum to a newborn. Don't worry about it too much. Going forward don't sleep with baby and make sure you utilise all the help you have around you. Get some rest without baby while you can. It will get easier Flowers

Thank you so much 😭 definitely not gonna cosleep from now. I’m way too scared

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Spacebears · 09/12/2022 18:42

dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:38

I didn’t want to cosleep either before he was born but I honestly didn’t know what else to do because baby would sleep nowhere else. Either on my bed or in my arms, that’s it. Or DH’s arms but he wasn’t home. I’m probably making no sense right now 😭

No I completely understand what you're saying and we all need sleep. The same for me, I intended her to sleep in her Moses basket until she was atleast 3 months but most nights she was in bed with me up until she was 5Grin. But that being said co sleeping can only be done when it's done safe.

Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:42

bumpytrumpy · 09/12/2022 18:40

No one can possible know. It's certainly unusual not to be woken by your own crying baby. A trip to GP wouldn't hurt.

You DH needs to help in the night and make sure the baby is safe in cot after feeds

Show quote history

I breastfeed and express too, DH helps a lot especially at night time. He does the night feeds (bottle expressed feeds) and he’s a huge help. I really do have a lot of support that’s why I’m so worried.

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Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:42

toomuchlaundry · 09/12/2022 18:40

Have you been ill which might make you more exhausted than normal?

Nope, I’ve been completely fine

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Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:44

Spacebears · 09/12/2022 18:42

No I completely understand what you're saying and we all need sleep. The same for me, I intended her to sleep in her Moses basket until she was atleast 3 months but most nights she was in bed with me up until she was 5Grin. But that being said co sleeping can only be done when it's done safe.

Show quote history

I understand. I don’t know what I’m going to do tonight and where baby will sleep but it definitely won’t be on the bed. I’m terrified honestly 🥺 I probably was exhausted, but how would I have been so fast asleep that I didn’t wake up to baby screaming next to me?

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Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:45

Sorry for asking so many questions (the same ones) guys 😭

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rainbowandglitter · 09/12/2022 18:45

Are you sleeping? You say your dh does night feeds which suggests you get enough sleep at night.
If it were me I'd take a trip to the doctor. It's nature to be programmed to sleep lightly and wake when your baby cries. Could you be anaemic or anything?

greenhousegal · 09/12/2022 18:46

When you get him in the cot, could you try put an item of clothing that smells of you near him for comfort? What about those cots that have three sides, one side is open to your bed?

I have no children so I am probably talking nonsense so forgive me if I have offered incorrect advice.

Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:46

I was anaemic near the end of my pregnancy if that might have an effect? That’s the only thing I can think of, that my iron levels might still be low

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Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:47

rainbowandglitter · 09/12/2022 18:45

Are you sleeping? You say your dh does night feeds which suggests you get enough sleep at night.
If it were me I'd take a trip to the doctor. It's nature to be programmed to sleep lightly and wake when your baby cries. Could you be anaemic or anything?

I could be anaemic because I was at the end of my pregnancy. My blood pressure didn’t get low or anything like that, neither did my sugar (I had GD and my follow up GTT today). Honestly last night I did get enough sleep because DH helped a lot with night feeds and also, baby slept very well last night.

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qpmz · 09/12/2022 18:47

Don't be hard on yourself. Everyone is ok. You are exhausted, it's hard. Co-sleeping is common and can be done safely if you choose to. Baby sounds normal too, they often don't settle easily in the early days. It's great you have family around - make sure they help while you try and take a nap in the day.
Don't lock the bedroom door though!

Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:48

greenhousegal · 09/12/2022 18:46

When you get him in the cot, could you try put an item of clothing that smells of you near him for comfort? What about those cots that have three sides, one side is open to your bed?

I have no children so I am probably talking nonsense so forgive me if I have offered incorrect advice.

I will try putting in an item of my clothing in case that helps. And it is a bedside cot that is attached to our bed

OP posts:
Original poster
dreamerkr · 09/12/2022 18:49

qpmz · 09/12/2022 18:47

Don't be hard on yourself. Everyone is ok. You are exhausted, it's hard. Co-sleeping is common and can be done safely if you choose to. Baby sounds normal too, they often don't settle easily in the early days. It's great you have family around - make sure they help while you try and take a nap in the day.
Don't lock the bedroom door though!

Thank you so much. Definitely not gonna lock the door from now on and neither will I make baby sleep in the bed with me. I know cosleeping can be safe but I’m just too scared to do it now.

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