Am I alone in thinking that the tantrummy toddler age is the absolute worst?!

[ImALittlePea]

(semi) light-hearted...

Toddler DD (coming up for 2yo) is such a tantrummy so-and-so at the moment. I love her to bloody bits but AARRGGHH she's just SUCH hard work. Knows what she wants, can't tell us (doesn't have many words yet), and loses her bloody mind if she doesn't get what she wants. Today's examples include:

• refused her dinner (which she has regularly) so hasn't eaten this evening (we don't offer an alternative, we know she eats enough daily/weekly, but it's just frustrating for us and painful to listen to the screaming)
• DH watching football so it wasn't 'her' TV on (cue ENORMOUS mum guilt for the fact she's so bloody addicted to the shitting TV already)
• hamster was asleep 🙄
• we had the audacity to take her and our eldest to the beach this morning (early, before too hot). Gave up and came back after 15 minutes.

I know none of it is her fault (or ours, apart from mum guilt telling me it is all my fault), but my god they are just SO unreasonable at that age! I'm not wishing time away but I can't wait for her to have words and be able to communicate more.

It's definitely the worst age for me!

Anyone else?!

Mine are 4 and 7 so I haven't experienced the teen years yet. But 0-6 months was by far the hardest stage for me. Give me a tantrumming toddler over a newborn any day.

Tbf mine were both good sleepers from 6 months onwards, sleep seems to be the key for me. Also I discovered that I am far more stubborn and strong willed than a toddler and I have an infinite amount of patience for tantrums. They could literally have screamed at me for hours and I would have been able to go about my day as if I couldn't hear it. I couldn't cope with newborn crying though. I think it's because I know that a toddler is crying because they are pissed off not because there is something wrong with them that I can't figure out.

I currently have an 18 month old, 3 year old and 14 year old and can confirm teenagers are far, far harder than toddlers. She's my best friend and I adore her but she's just as unreasonable but much bigger and into more dangerous stuff. The little ones go to bed at 7pm and can be picked up and carried if needs be - I can't MAKE my eldest do anything. I agree with the PP who said age 6-10 is the easiest years and as much as I'd never wish time away, it will be nice to have a 7 year old, 9 year old and 20 year old who will (hopefully) all be as reasonable then as they are unreasonable now

Yes. If your one child is under 2 years old how can you know what's the "worst" age? Good luck for the rest of it op.

Nope.
Teenagers are the hardest because it's all about them becoming independent, their sexuality, their first loves, perhaps experiencing drugs and/or alcohol, failing or succeeding with exams, trying to figure out where their place is in this world.
Watching your child get crushed by some things, elated by others, trying so hard and not always succeeding. Second guessing themselves. Doubting themselves. And the joy when some things come together.
It's such an emotional and psychological rollercoaster.
Makes a few toddler tantrums and sleepless nights seem easy peasy.

Nah 0-18 months much worse.
At least toddlers:
Sleep through night (more so than babies)
Can speak so you've got something to work with
Are less effing dull than babies
Make you laugh
Are starting to eat along with rest of family (ie grown up food, simple versions obvs)
Toddler tantrum much easier to deal with than a screaming baby where you don't even know what's going on.

My 14 month old lost his shit with me the other day because I wouldn't let him have a gravy bone like I had just given the dog. I think it's started early..

I once asked someone when it got easier and was told that it didn’t, it just got different!

However as the mum of 2 fully grown, out there in the world, adults, they are amazing and we must have got something right as they are an absolute delight to spend time with.

Hang in there!

@Mammma91 it's so hard isn't it. I often cry into the freezer when it gets too much!

@WorkinOnOurNightMoves haha she's definitely cute, and it definitely helps!

@MotherofPearl TOTAL absence of logic! Totally agree with you.

Nah not the worst age for me, it’s the best so far. Yeah he’d get slammed in AIBU but he’s fine after a cuddle. Today he lifted the potty lid - did a shit - wiped his butt pulled the fake flusher and said, ucky poo done all clean now.. and toddled off. He also just says mummy snack or Mummy drink.

My baby on the other hand; total fucking screamer, screams at everything and always has. He’s 99th centile so absolute massive and I have to lug him around because it lessens the screaming. Doesn’t know what he wants even if you offer it.

RIP back - I hate it when they’re so dependant on you. Much better now🥹😍

Physically tiring: babies/toddlers
Infuriating and fun: 3/4
Sweet and lovely: 5-11
Emotionally draining: 12-adult

My 23 yo is lovely again.
I am in the thick of it with my 13yo.
I mean I just asked him to bring his bedroom bin down. What sort of mother am I?! Pick your battles? I didn't think the fucking bedroom bin was battle worthy. Am girding myself for further "battles" - crockery downstairs, laundry, packing for some days away. No wonder I stay up too late after he's turned in.

She isn't really capable of 'misbehaving' at her age. She isn't being naughty; she's being unreasonable. We're not at the stage for needing to discipline her, when she's in the midst of an almighty tantrum we try and cuddle, make sure she's safe, take her away from the situation if need be.

Not sure that's what you meant?

No. Teens are the hardest. But toddlers are difficult too. Primary school years were great. Babies are just tiring.

Erm nope. The teenage years are a gazillion times worse than the toddler years

I feel like you've either misunderstood me, or I've totally misread your post?!

Read: (semi) light-hearted 🙄

And fwiw, she's not my only child. I also have a nearly 8yo.

How very dare you?! 😜

Yeah she definitely does make us laugh. But she doesn't have many words yet at all, which makes her frustrations more explosive!

Tbf, she was a fucking hard baby as well. Maybe it's just her 😬🤣

Kids that have been parented well early on are easy teens in my experience. The parents that didn’t put the work in earlier have troublesome teens. 🤭

That's very true! And I'm glad your two have grown into lovely adults, that's the aim isn't it.

I'm hanging in there, for sure. I'm not worried etc etc. Just gently venting after a difficult couple of days in the heat (and forgetting how seriously some people take the light-hearted threads).

I'm another daft enough to have had toddlers and teenagers at the same time, and ive done it twice over.

What's worse depends on the time of day. Babies/toddlers wake early and overnight, teens don't go to bed.

I’m loving age 2 personally. He’s a relatively easy 2 year old though off the back of being a total nightmare baby, which I’m sure helps. We don’t really get tantrums currently which is a big bonus. He tends to more whine and complain if things doing go his way, which, albeit annoying, is a lot easier to deal with then trying to drag a screaming and kicking lump out of a supermarket (had the pleasure with my 1.5 yo nephew the other day 😂). I’m sure I’ll pay for my relative luck (because that’s all it is - luck) in the future when DS is a horror 4 year old/14 year old/whatever…nobody gets through 18+ years of parenting unscathed.

Tbf, she was a fucking hard baby as well. Maybe it's just her

😂 My son was a very bad sleeper as a baby, he crawled and walked really early and had zero fear as a toddler, he was the one everyone described as ‘wilful’ and ‘spirited’ and we all know what that really means! But as a teen, he is a breeze. Never would we have thought it was possible. There’s hope! 😂

Teens
Teens
Teens

And I'll say it again

Teens.

My little one is 3.5 and she's been a little horror since she turned 3. I am so exhausted, none of it makes sense 😮‍💨 was enjoying motherhood until she turned 3. Even my other half whose just spent a week holiday with her thinks we need to take her to the doctors as she's just so violent with us and the poor dog and won't nap or generally sleep, apparently she hates sleeping, tells us every night during bedtime battles, it's really no fun. My mind is blown on a daily basis, I've even had to go see the doctor for mental health issues it's been so bad. However when I pick her up from nursery she's been a star and so good 💆‍♀️

Age 8 is bloody hard work as well. Year 9 ( around 14) is pretty hellish but toddlers are HARD as well.

Hmmm toddler years are hard work, equally it’s harder when they are 5-7 because if they have a tantrum it’s not socially acceptable