Am I alone in thinking that the tantrummy toddler age is the absolute worst?!

[ImALittlePea]

(semi) light-hearted...

Toddler DD (coming up for 2yo) is such a tantrummy so-and-so at the moment. I love her to bloody bits but AARRGGHH she's just SUCH hard work. Knows what she wants, can't tell us (doesn't have many words yet), and loses her bloody mind if she doesn't get what she wants. Today's examples include:

• refused her dinner (which she has regularly) so hasn't eaten this evening (we don't offer an alternative, we know she eats enough daily/weekly, but it's just frustrating for us and painful to listen to the screaming)
• DH watching football so it wasn't 'her' TV on (cue ENORMOUS mum guilt for the fact she's so bloody addicted to the shitting TV already)
• hamster was asleep 🙄
• we had the audacity to take her and our eldest to the beach this morning (early, before too hot). Gave up and came back after 15 minutes.

I know none of it is her fault (or ours, apart from mum guilt telling me it is all my fault), but my god they are just SO unreasonable at that age! I'm not wishing time away but I can't wait for her to have words and be able to communicate more.

It's definitely the worst age for me!

Anyone else?!

My dc is nearly 4 and I’m definitely going to have a breakdown soon if he doesn’t grow out of the weird, impulsive, annoying and tantruming toddler/preschooler stage. His language skills are great - that’s actually made it harder because he argues back and ties to justify everything to suit himself, and a lot of the time I don’t know what the hell to do. Weirdly, 20 months was my favourite age as he was quite sweet with his babbling. He started tantruming aged 2.5 and he’s definitely made up for any lost time now!

DS as a toddler was a breeze compared to DS at 13/14. Enjoy the golden years aged 6-10. Seriously.

It's exactly like the twos (all about 'no' and trying to assert control) but they think they can reason with you (they can't) and are much heavier and don't nap.

This about the fours. When she was two and I saw her bottom lip start wobbling I could distract my daughter with a pigeon/passing cat/bus/breadstick. Now I listen to the Encanto soundtrack on repeat and seem to barter in Capri-Sun and trips to McDonald’s.

Though for shitness nothing beats 1-6 months for me. You’re sleep deprived with no prospect of let-up, you invariably get something from the one armed bandit of mastitis/feeding issues/colds and bugs/colic, the baby has no concept of waiting (or bribery) and they aren’t that entertaining. I’ll take Bruno on repeat thanks.

Toddlers are far far harder work than teenagers.

I think most here that say teenagers are harder than young children have just forgotten what young children are like.

With teenagers you at least get some sleep

Mine are in their 20s and I found puberty the most challenging time by far.

A PP nailed it with physical vs emotional exhaustion with toddlers and teens.

I was enjoying every part until this pregnancy turned me into a human slug, devoid of all energy.

I haven't forgotten the toddler years.

I had one who barely slept. 15 months between them. Both autistic.
Trust me, I remember all the years. 🤣

'I WAAANT TOOAAST'
*wild about the eyes, 'ok darling! No problem, I'll put it in the toaster!'
roaring 'NOT TOAST FROM THE TOOOASTTERRRR'

3-4 years are the worst☹️☹️ she driving me bloody crazy and some I don't think I'm going to make it. Don't get me wrong I love her to bits but my God she a handful at the moment.

Bloody hell im probably just hot and grumpy here but we get it, parents of teens, it’s worse for you, how awful, yes. Any chance we could get back to toddlers which is what the threads about??

Sorry, op, but I agree with this. At least with toddlers you can always pick them up and carry them off under your arm, kicking and screaming! And they're more distractable too. A wise person once told me that in daily life with small children, there are lots and lots of little problems. As they get older, the problems become fewer but harder.

Is it?
She asked if the toddler stage was the worst.

surely those of us who've experienced more stages giving our opinion is answering the question.

I really enjoyed 0-2 but found 3 and 4 pretty difficult. Tantrums when they can scream words at you are worse than young toddler tantrums in my opinion. Mine is 5 now and starting to get a bit more reasonable.

I agree with the OP. I found the toddler years harder work than any other age. I quite enjoyed my kids teenage years.

Maybe @IncompleteSenten but tbh some people have taken it very literally.

Genuine apologies if I was a bit OTT there, but in fairness there is an entire board dedicated to teenagers!

Had toddlers, toddlers teenagers and young adults all at the same time - they really don't improve with age except for a wee phase pre-teens when they have a level of independence and sense while still being friendly..... Probably to lull you into a false sense of security.
From mid twenties they tend to turn into pleasant people - unless they move back in.....

Thanks @CuriousCatfish

I have no doubt teen years bring some very tough emotional challenges but the physical exhaustion isn’t there. And you do get lie ins, which is something!

I needed to see this today. My 3 year old is on another level of tantrums at the moment and I had to shut myself in the bathroom for a wee cry. Sorry to hear your all having a miserable time with the tantrums too - I hope they all sleep well tonight! X

I found the toddler stage the hardest. Now they’re teens, they are so easy. And grumpy toddlers in the heat, I remember it well. Unreasonable isn’t the word...they make no sense, I suppose it’s a good job they’re so cute at that age. 😂

Mine were all hard at different early stages but I remember 2 1/2 being particularly low!

they’re now all teens and actually (fingers crossed) really easy and genuinely good company. Plus they can put their own seatbelts on and get me a cup of tea!

Couldn't agree more OP.

Mine are all thankfully past that stage now but I found it horrendous. It's the total absence of logic or rational thought that gets me down with toddlers.

What are you doing to discipline her when she misbehaves OP?

Teenagers much harder-they can still be as unreasonable and stroppy-add in the inability to fix things with a cuddle and they are really like giant toddlers with car keys...

Well, I did say semi light-hearted.....

All I'm taking from this is NONE of it is particularly easy.