AIBU Partners child stressing out my nursing kitten.

[Godsakesss]

My cat has 3, 2 week old baby’s and she is incredibly protective over them. She is in a secure room and I don’t want anyone unfamiliar around them until they are older. When they was 1 week old he (7 years) stormed into the living room and was stamping all over the place and tried picking up the kittens. My partner just stood there and didn’t say anything so I said “it’s time to go for a walk now guys”. Now he is coming over Sunday and my partner said “he can hold one of the kittens” to which I replied no, they are still very delicate and mum is stressed out enough as is. He acted as though I was being horrible but I’m protecting my cat and her kittens from more stress. He seems to be more concerned with pleasing his son than actually teaching him that he can’t always have his way. Just for a bit of context when she was pregnant he was chasing her around the house and shuvving crisp packets in her face and trying to use a foam roller on her stomach so she doesn’t like him at all but yet my boyfriend thinks I’m being unreasonable for saying I don’t want him around the kittens (if at all) until they are older.

Most 7 year olds are very receptive to positive interactions it really wouldn’t take much effort to explain how to behave around the cats and to improve general behaviour rather than just banning a child from the house @FishAndChipps

I agree with you a 7 year old should be receptive to this, but probably not from dads gf. Especially if dads saying the opposite. Different if dads on board but he doesn't.

I don't think the 7 year old is really the problem iMO, these skills can be taught (and clearly haven't been and that's not the child's fault) neither is it OP.

I think it's the partner/dad who's the actual issue and the one I would be banning from the house tbh.

This is a 🚩 is ever I saw one. Run.

Doesn't sound like he is**

Ffs that part of sentence vanished.

That's the parent's job

It's not exactly a hard job and every animal the child meets afterwards will benefit. I wouldn't want to have a man in my life who couldn't teach their child to be considerate of animals, but I would still try to teach the child before releasing them back into the wild.

@Coyoacan I speak from experience here, as a long standing step mum (although op isn't a sm at the moment by Mn standards).

You can try and teach a child all the things in the world but if the parent isn't backing you up. There isn't a hope in hell of you being effective.

Dad doesn't think his behaviour was wrong hen why op is posting. He's had the chance to teach said child about these things and hasn't and doesn't want to.

@pitchforksandflamethrowers. I would not stay with a man who was incapable of teaching common decency to their child, but I would still make the effort with the child, for their sake and the sake of all the animals that child will come into contact with in the future. If it doesn't work, so be it.

@Coyoacan hence why I told the op to run because it seems like she tried and dad wasn't having any of it.

In all of this op and the child aren't the problem. I just don't understand the vile she's getting for it tbh..

This relationship is not going to work.
Hope your cat's okay. I picked up a kitten from a box after being born as a young child, the kitten died, I felt awful.

His parenting is lacking, he should be teaching his child to respect others, animals are others.

I have an 8 year old, we have always had cats and regularly provide foster place for stray/abandoned cats and kittens. He regularly has friends over and never have I had to deal with this type of behavior.

Children tend to perhaps not understand their strength but other than ensuring I give clear direction once that is all that has needed to happen. This is a pity as I truly believe children and animals benefit so much from each other.

So sad - my youngest adores my elder cat - they are such great pals - she suffers no fools but adores her big friend and loves nothing better than giving a head boop when she passes him. Over the years they have had great games with toy cars, playing fetch - her hitting a ball to him and both enjoyed tummy time on the activity mat.

This is a parent problem and to be honest a huge red flag to me - an adult who doesn't protect vulnerable kittens - that would be a nope!