Girls' school uniform without hearts, bows or butterflies all over it??

[AlternateFri]

Buying DD's first school uniform for September. The pinafores, summer dresses and "girl" shoes are frilly, or have butterflies on the zips, heart shaped pockets and bloody bows etc etc.

"Girl" shoes are flimsy, don't fully cover the feet up. I've ordered black Velcro trainer style ones that our school allows that will keep water out and she can run about and climb in, at least. Other "boys" shoes have footballs and dinosaurs on.

Do any shops have school uniform without the stupid stereotypical gendered add ons? I've tried M&S, sainsburys, John Lewis and asda George.

I've managed to pick a few of the least offensive items. But I'd like to support a shop that wasn't doing this at all if possible.

This is really helpful too. Thank you.

My daughter always had uniform from the boys section to avoid the unnecessary stereotype business on the girls uniform. I'm not sure why the do it, the boys don't have anything in their zips.

Aldi uniform on sale in store tomorrow.
Black, black/pink trainers
Basic skirts and trousers
Tights
My DD started last September and most of her uniform is still good.
I got her some school shoes from clarks as it was her 1st ones and they've actually lasted all year compared to her brother whose gone through about 5 pairs!

This is 100% what will happen I bet!

The uniform I ordered last night is on the way. If she rejects at the unisex velcro shoes I'll give in. I'm not going to force her to feel left out because of my ideology.

I really like the PP's Picasso point about learning the rules before breaking them. But also if she's bows and frills for life.. that's her and I'll love her for it. I just want it to be aa actual choice from her, not a presumption from the adult world that's been pushed onto her.

Dd just wears leggings and a logo polo top and jumper which is unisex. Sounds like your dd wants the 'girlie stuff' which is fine. I'd just go with it, she'll either grow out of it or she won't. Either is fine, it's who she is. Agree with sensible closes shoes being a better option but I've always managed to find options. Youngest dd just wants Nike trainers now though.

This annoyed me when my dd started school. I bought her a pair of gender neutral (but probably boys) black Velcro shoes from clarks. Needn't have bothered though.....within a term she wanted the same Mary Jane style ones with mermaids, shells, diamanté on that all the other little girls had. I gave in.

Apart from being open though, I have found the clarks girls school shoes to be surprisingly durable and well made. And the patent ones are nice and wipeable. So we continue to keep them in business....

Geox and bobux might be worth looking at if you are after a closed shoe.

We had some lovely grid closed leather shoes which were light and comfortable and had some patent trim so wouldn't be seen as 'boys shoes' Asda have something similar at the moment. The alternative to Mary Janes isn't just clumpy trainers

*geox

We buy ours from the uniform supplier as everything is school specific, nothing comes with a heart or a star. Try the actual supplier rather than supermarket. I don't really see why you are bothered, your child is 3, she'll probably like the addition of a pretty heart, much to your horror. I can't say I got worked up over my daughter having frozen shoes and my son having rockets on his, just buy what fits and what your child is comfortable in.

I used to be like this especially with dd1. 12 years on I am a lot more relaxed. I think the practicality arguement doesn't really hold up. The most hard wearing shoes we've had are Lelli kellies and I have learned to always choose patent to avoid scuffs. If it's pouring with rain the only suitable shoes are wellies - boys shoes/trainers don't make much difference. And they are all fine for running and playing. Girls have a lot more choice at our primary - boys are stuck wearing a tie all year round while girls have the summer dress or play suit option which my daughter likes. I also agree with pp that we shouldn't have to think that the unisex option has to be the male option. There is nothing inherently wrong with those things (rightly or wrongly) associated with femininity.

I love the cutesy girls stuff tbh. As do my girls. They’ve always been into their pink/sparkles/unicorns etc. quite independently of me.

i ordered my eldest school trousers from Next because I was worried about her classroom (windows open etc) being cold. She would not be caught dead in them. I gave them away.

I think you need to let them fit in tbh. Don’t impose your views at the expense of their friendships (because this shit matters when you’re five - it would be nice if it didn’t, but it does).

Can't girls just wear shorts or trousers if you want to? In theory boys could wear pinafore dresses if they wanted to.
My daughter has gingham playsuits instead of summer dresses, far more practical, and she also wears shorts and polo shirts in the summer - standard polo shirts not frilly.

I started out like this with DD was little bought also sort of toys clothes etc but she is completely into pink and glitter. She doesn’t get it from me but I do want her to be able to express herself and make choices. I wasn’t allowed to do that as a child really and know I now that I don’t have confidence in my decisions.

There is uniform available that is plain ( I also have a school starter) but I let my daughter choose and she chose the one covered in bows! I like that she knows what she likes, it isn’t what I would have chosen for her but it does meet school uniform regulations. It sounds a bit like you are saying a choice shouldn’t be available. Of course children should be allowed to wear any variation of the uniform and it shouldn’t be gender specific, but sometimes children like bows and butterflies. Nothing wrong with that either.

Also those suggesting it, schools around her don’t allow leggings.

Your daughter probably doesn't care about an embroidered flower on her dress, it's just parents, every time. She'll probably grow up to wear dresses and makeup like her friends when she's in secondary, it doesn't matter. Buy what fits, and what you can afford. All this freaking out over anything 'stereotypical' is a bit ridiculous and draws more attention to it, if anything.

I buy shorts and trousers from the "boys" section of Sainsburys and skirts of various styles (skater, two pleats, all pleats) but no hearts etc at John Lewis.

Shoes from Clarks or Startrite but not wanting sparkly bits on school shoes limits our choice or sometimes makes us buy "boys shoes". She wears T-bar or Mary-Janes in Summer and enclosed shoes in Winter.

John Lewis was always good for more traditional, less trashy uniform.

‘Trashy’ - what snobbery! I would never chose some of the things my daughter likes but it’s makes her happy, and she is finding the person she is. She is definitely not trashy because she likes hearts and sparkles.

Absolutely . Im no fan of pink and sparkles and horses and unicorns... but lots of girls are.

We are our own worst enemy when we make anything "feminine" as the lesser choice... its subtle but its another form of patriarchy to convince ourself that the mens option is unisex/better.

Lol why do some people on this thread think they are superior for dressing their kids in no-frills clothes? What is that?

Exactly @LifeInsideMyhead . We shouldn’t instil gender stereotypes, we should all be free to like what we like. But that also doesn’t mean “feminine” choices are lesser. I think you put that really well.

I've got two girls, I've never had this issue. No unwanted hearts or butterflies or sparkles.

Closest we've been were flower shaped buttons on a cardi which I removed and swapped for normal ones as they were impossible to do up.

I don't have a problem with 'girls' shoes. They are fine for climbing, playing football, jumping about etc. No wet feet reported.

Call me cynical but part of the reason why uniform is like this is so that parents have to buy a new set if they younger child is a boy.
There is no reason why primary school uniform should not be unisex. Same polo shirts, sweatshirts and trousers - skirt option if parents want that.
Scalloped collars and puff sleeves? Ridiculous. Stupid open top shoes or flimsy ballerina flats? I used to look at these and think why are girls ending up with wet feet while the boys are wearing sensible shoes.
The shoes especially scream that little girls should sit nicely while boys can run around.

In response to PP about seeing the feminine as the worse option for uniform - that’s because it is, especially if you walk to school. If the walk consists of jumping out of the car right by the school gate maybe you’re ok … but those of us who walked to school as kids remember cold wet legs in skirts while brothers were warm and dry.
Plenty of mum friends with daughters have had to get their DC to walk in wellies in wet weather and change shoes at school otherwise their feet would be soaking wet.
I was at primary school in the 70s and remember that even when there was no uniform, girls were not allowed to wear trousers unless it was snowing. What the hell was that about? Bloody ridiculous form of discrimination. Trousers are practical and sensible.

@AlternateFri , I totally agree with you. My youngest child is about to leave primary school and she gave up on “girls” uniform years ago. She’s all about cargo shorts and polo shirts. I absolutely understand your horror of gendered school uniform. I’m not sure why it is necessary to have anything other than plain buttons and zip pulls!