Newborn cried for 8 hours nonstop

[Tiredmamaa]

FTM to a one month old. Last night was peak crying. Me and DH tried everything. She eventually tired herself out after another feed.
I'm really struggling. I wanted a baby so much, and I knew babies weren't easy and people may flame me for this but I didn't know they were this hard.
I've been to GP, midwives, health visitor who all confirm she's healthy and the fussiness and crying is something she will grow out of.
Shes a very hungry and gassy baby - I formula feed.

What am I supposed to do in the meantime. With DH back st work I feel so lonely in the daytimes and my experience of motherhood is just tiring and stressful. It pains me to see her cry and that I can't calm her. Everything people suggest I've tried. I'm on empty now, feel like a failure and just broken.

I agree, she sounds just like my granddaughter was. She had silent reflux and cmpa. Hospitalised at two days old with breathing difficulties, intensive care five days, then on a ward for a further five days. Diagnosed with silent reflux. But once home she screamed for hours, difficulty in pooing, would only sleep on her tummy, they tried everything, raising the head of the cot, tiger in the tree hold, white noise, changing formulas, She had infant gaviscon, ranitidine, neither of which did much to help. it was only diagnosed when in desperation her mum rang the consultant who’d cared for her in hospital, he told her to go in to see him after his appointments finished. He diagnosed her with cmpa, changed her medication to omeprazol and prescription only milk free formula. Her gp wouldn’t repeat the prescription when it ran out, he tried to put her something else (cheaper). It was awful, my daughter had to fight for her dd, the consultant had to ring him and insist he repeated the original meds as she needed it.

I thought water for a baby under 6 months was a no no?

Sounds awful OP and like reflux as others have said.

if she’s breastfed I’d suggest getting her latch checked by a lactation consultant. I had similar issues and was fobbed off. Turned out little boy still had a tongue tie which was the reason he was struggling to gain weight and was so miserable and windy (and not my milk supply as suggested by dr)

Hi OP
my dd was similar although crying wasn’t as long as 8 hrs. She has silent reflux. We manage it without meds at the moment by keeping her very upright after her feeds and feeding little and often. I also switched formula from Aptamil to Hipp Organic. I had to phase in the change but once she was fully on it she improved a lot so it may be something to try. Good luck and you will get through it although I know it won’t seem like it at the moment.

I was advised by HV to give cool boiled water in small amounts to ds when he was constipated

It worked lovely

Mine was the same. It was reflux. No one believed me until she vomited blood.

Infant gaviscon helped and I swear by cranial osteopathy for babies. It’s bloody expensive though.

First of all, congratulations on your new baby. You are doing amazingly well. 8 hours solid crying is very extreme, the fact that you're still able to string a sentence together after that is incredible. My baby cried a lot at that age, but never for such a long time. I still felt like the walking dead, and I cried constantly - I'd be alone in my house with my baby actually wailing along with him. Like other PPs said, I definitely cried more than the baby! So give yourself a big pat on the back for how well you're doing, I really mean it.

It's a very rough time for most people. All those people you see talking about how dreamy and easy the newborn phase are either lying or they're lucky to have an easy baby.

I know it seems like a million miles away now, but it will get better in a few months. It's hard when they're so little as they give you nothing back. But when they start smiling at you, you'll relax knowing they're happy. I remember taking my baby to the doctors at 4 weeks as he seemed to be uncomfortable and in pain. They said "oh don't worry, it'll probably pass by 3 or 4 months". I sat there in shock. I could not imagine a reality where I would still be alive and not dead from sleep deprivation if this continued for three or four months!!! I couldn't believe I was expected to do it. But I did do it, and I survived. You will too. It goes quickly.

I agree that for such a long amount of crying, I'd be back pestering the GP. Don't let them fob you off!

Just don't think you're a failure because I promise you're not - you're doing so well x

My first would cry like that from about 6pm onwards every evening. He was a colicky baby and it was very tough so I completely understand ❤️

You might have already tried these but just incase, these were some things that helped us.

We switched from SMA to cow and gate and we stitched from tommee tippee bottles to MAM, this settled things down LOADS

Deep baths, bicycle legs and infacol before every feed and burp after every ounce also helped us.

I never used a dummy but I’ve heard that they can be good for colicky babies to settle tummy’s.

8 hours really doesn't sound normal - poor her and poor you. I can't imagine.

I would really take her to the doctor and check everything is OK. DS had reflux and it was debilitating, only picked up at six weeks. Research into silent reflux and see if she matches the symptoms.

How are her poos? Aptamil contains dairy.... possible CMPA?

Newborns are the worst age. You're tired, sore, weary, nervous. You've been to hell and back and have been fobbed off with this little stranger who you have no idea how to look after, what they like, who they are, if you are doing a good job etc. It will get easier. In a few weeks, you'll begin to recognise the cues etc.

All I can say is hang the fuck on, you're doing an amazing job.

Try a non-dairy formula. Your description does sound like there is more going on, perhaps an intolerance to cows milk protein and/or lactose. Poor baby (poor parents).

60ml for a newborn is quite a lot of water, that would have been a full feed for my baby at that age. I'd ditch that.

I know you said you've tried a sling, but do you have a more structured baby carrier? We found our reflux baby much preferred the Ergo to the stretchy wrap, I think it felt more secure and held her more upright.

Lots of good advice here. My oldest had silent reflux although it took a long time to find that out. Mine also loved Tiger in the tree hold, although I never knew it was called that. it is soul destroying when they cry like that. Mine slept on his side, but he could turn over very young.

and my second was an angel who slept 12 hours a night from 6 weeks.

Comfort formula worked for my youngest who had reflux.

Reflux Reflux Reflux !!! Get to a paediatrician who knows about it - you'd want to try a non dairy formula (completely non dairy as some aren't). And possibly medication like omeprazole. Hold the baby upright as much as possible until then. It kills you. I am so very sorry but you will get through xx

Does sound like reflux but also bear in mind overtired won’t help. They can only go ninety minutes awake at that age - are you keeping an eye on that and trying to get her to sleep after that amount of time?

Gripe water and also change the teat on the bottle? Or change the bottle.

Mine has reflux. She will drink and drink and drink but then that causes discomfort because she’s too full. I was feeding (first pumped breastmilk then formula when supply dropped) on demand as that was what everyone told us to do but actually I was making it worse as she wasn’t hungry at all. Since we’ve stopped that and only feed 4oz every four hours she’s much better (11 weeks). We also switched milks twice as Aptimil didn’t agree with her and HiPP smells horrendous when sicked up, we’re on Kendamil now and have been for the last 5 weeks.

My dd was the same...for the first three months. We did everything we could colic-related but just as she grew out of it, it occurred to me that it might have been head pain. She was a forceps delivery and had I thought about it earlier I would have taken her for cranial osteopathy.

Is it colic? She might be better on a non dairy milk, like soya

DS was exactly the same, and it was colic. It stopped dead in the 3 months. I was breastfeeding but didn't exclude dairy, as I did with my DD

Our baby was exactly like this. We used MAM bottles but stayed on size 1 that as the others flooded him and made his reflux worse. Changed to kendamil formula (its amazing!!) And he now has colief in every bottle hes 7 months and we've had no issues since. If we miss the colief or try reduce it he screams like he's been murdered. I never believed in any of the 'medicines' and infacol did nothing for him. Its bloody hard work and knackering. You're doing an amazing job hang in there x

Sounds like colic to me, I feel for you as it's so hard watching them scream in pain & nothing works. Our DD suffered badly when she was tiny, it unfortunately continued too & like you we tried everything.

What worked was my cutting out all layered vegetables... (sprouts, lettuce, leek, onion etc). This was on the advice of a naturopath friend who specialised in babies & children. This fixed it, but she'd have odd flare ups, plus now eczema too .... this turned out to be my monthly cravings for cheap jelly sweets she is intolerant of the chemical additives in them & still is today as an adult

Also Lavender oil is safe & calming for newborns, use it with Epsom salt in a bath, the salts helps calm frayed nerves & pain signals as it's full of magnesium. I'd advise this for you & baby, we found it a godsend when our DD wouldn't sleep

lots of great advice here op. just want to say we are all behind you, a crying newborn for 8 hours - you are truly digging deep and getting through it even if it's one of the toughest things you will ever have to do 💐

My baby was like this and it was unbearable!!!! I was back and forth to the GP and after 8 weeks of it I just couldn’t cope anymore and ended up having a complete emotional breakdown in the GP and I couldn’t stop crying. I was absolutely exhausted and it was breaking my heart seeing my baby in so much pain and not being able to help.

It was then suggested he may have CMPA which is indeed what it was.

Please tell the GP you want to trial some hydrolysed milk in case of it being an allergy.

Oh your poor thing and poor baby. 8 hours..!

I don't have additional advice but I hope something here helps. You're not failing, you're doing wonderfully and you're an absolute heroine for surviving 8 hours of crying!

Your little baby is so lucky to have you.

Sending supportive vibes your way

And if you aren’t already, make sure you use the Paced Feeding technique when you give her her bottles. Lots of good videos on YouTube.