Newborn cried for 8 hours nonstop

[Tiredmamaa]

FTM to a one month old. Last night was peak crying. Me and DH tried everything. She eventually tired herself out after another feed.
I'm really struggling. I wanted a baby so much, and I knew babies weren't easy and people may flame me for this but I didn't know they were this hard.
I've been to GP, midwives, health visitor who all confirm she's healthy and the fussiness and crying is something she will grow out of.
Shes a very hungry and gassy baby - I formula feed.

What am I supposed to do in the meantime. With DH back st work I feel so lonely in the daytimes and my experience of motherhood is just tiring and stressful. It pains me to see her cry and that I can't calm her. Everything people suggest I've tried. I'm on empty now, feel like a failure and just broken.

I wonder whether she is allergic to the formula as well, she may be milk intolerant.

try changing formula to a milk free one? I think there is a soya formula.

Are you or your partner really tall? She may be growing a lot. Therefore hungry baby formula? I had to use this with my son who is now 18 and 6ft 5!

use infracol for trapped wind. GP can prescribe Ranitidine for reflux if needed.

you poor things you must both be exhausted!

Have you heard of cranial therapy for babies . Might be worth a read. It does cost though. Hope it gets better for you.

Ds2 cried and cried all night, on and off, not 8 hours straight, many times for weeks. I tried everything, every reflux medicine - anything I could get hold off, cranial, talked to HV, GP, went to clinic, eventually took him privately to Paed. All quite unsympathetic I found. Nothing worked. Bought me to my knees and I occasionally sobbed. You have my sympathy. People underestimate how damaging lack of sleep is.

@Tiredmamaa I think a lot of the time they are just tired, ratty and the more worked up they get the harder it is for them to nod off, which is what they desperately need.

I remember posting on here in absolute despair when DS was around the same age and he’d been crying so long I was in tears as well. It’s awful.

it somehow does pass, he’s a lovely boy now (mostly!)

Tiger in the Tree Hold worked well for my dd with silent reflux who screamed for the first 6 months. We also ended up deciding to put her to sleep on her belly as we had no risk factors for SIDS and that helped a lot as well.

PS. DD was exclusively bf, but Paediatrician in USA convinced us to add a bottle a day of Enfamil AR and it really really really helped. It got much better once she started on solids as well.

This will pass! In the meantime here’s something specific to try:

• swaddle baby if they like it, if not dress them in a warm and comfy sleepsuit
• give them a dummy to suck (if they haven’t taken to a dummy, persevere and help them learn how to suck it/ hold on to it. It’s a great soother especially for tummy troubles)
• hold them on their side with tummy pressed against your body and head supported in the crook of one arm (like cradle hold for breastfeeding). Hold them tight and snug against you
• walk around, and try out different rocking motions, experiment until you find the movement type they like best
• lean down and SSSSHHHHHHH loudly in their ear, over and over

good luck! 🌺

I know the feeling op it is the worst. All these people who say newborns are easy have never had a colicky baby, it is pure hell on earth. Mine did get better after 6 weeks or so though. My 3rd was also like this but was prescribed ranitidine for reflux and it made a huge difference. We also tried different milks, a comfort milk like aptimal comfort or hipp organic was better. It will get better so try and hang in there. Also, randomly I always assumed my DD would like singing, white noise etc but now she's older she hates noise like that so I was probably making it worse by singing to her!

Have you tried a warm bath? I used to get in with mine and snuggle him in the warm water and it soothed him and tired him out. But be careful you don't fall asleep! If you feel sleepy at all, have a plastic box with a folded towel next to the bath and lean over and put the baby in it.

You say she's 'hungry' a couple of times.

Babies with reflux suck to comfort the pain - but more milk (especially if they are allergic to it) just makes it worse. So they suck more. So you get stuck in a crying circle.

This really sounds like CMPA / reflux to me.

Tbh, this sounds like CMPA or some other allergies

Have you tried colief drops? They were a life saver for our son when he was that age? He would cry all night

Do you do paced bottle feeding?

Hi op

It sounds exactly like reflux.

• look at changing her milk
• perhaps better bottles like dr browns
• use infacol and Dentinox colic drops at every single feed. You said you only do infacol every so often so it's likely she's struggling with gas, not sure why you haven't started giving her it properly when this is typical of young babies. Start this immediately and it will take a few days for her to settle.

This is exactly what my baby was like. Crying for 8, 10, 12 hours - shrieking, sleeping for about 15/20 seconds at a time. This was every day. Health visitor, family and friends didn’t believe me until they witnessed it. White noise, baths, massage, car drive etc etc etc didn’t help at all. Colief helped a lot but wasn’t a miracle. Colief was expensive but fortunately the GP witnessed him in full flow and so we got it on prescription. At 14 months it all stopped.

Hope you're ok 💖 the new born stage is definitely alot harden than the love bubble everyone talks about.
My DD went through similar until I changed formula. We tried a few different brands of formula until we found one that suited us. We were also really strict with burping... I can't remember the actual amount, but I think every 30 seconds or so, we stopped and burped her. I also found a really gentle squeeze at her lower back/waist made her really burp compared to the traditional patting and rubbing.
My little one was constipated too and baby massage worked really well for us.
Hope you get some rest soon

I know parents whose baby seemed to change personality after switching to a non-dairy formula, from crying all the time to being mostly content.

I can’t state how strongly it’s worth treating this as CMPA and trialling a non-dairy, non-soya formula.

Handhold OP, my DS2 was like this for the first 7.5mths, just horrible. I am sure most babies aren’t like DS2 is was very extreme. I felt so guilty as I couldn’t do anything to stop him, I honestly tried everything, pushing the pram, car trips, infacol, he was breast feed but that didn’t calm him either, cranial osteopathic treatment, white noise, and would have danced around the garden at midnight naked if it would have stopped him. Just an exhausting, stressful time, with lots of Dr’s visits, they didn’t want to know as he would be fine once DH got him there in the middle of the night, to be told he’s a healthy baby and would smile at the Dr, so frustrating.

It came as a shock as DS1 was the most calmest, contented baby and the reason I had two under two (21mth gap).

Honestly, it is just about surviving with a newborn like this, take offers of help, my late MIL was an absolute angel and helped me so much. DH and I hardly saw each other, as I would go to bed early, while DH looked after DS2, then when he finally got him to sleep around midnight, DH would come to bed and I would get up and feed him when he woke up. MIL had him one night a week, looked after him in our home, made us go out on a date night etc. She really went above and beyond to help us.

You will get through it, and it will get easier, it really will. Sadly for me a DC3 was out of the question as I honestly don’t think I could have risked getting another baby like him.

DS2 is 19 now and still noisy, determined and very driven, but also such a loving, loyal person. DS1 just turned 21, still very calm, quiet & gentle and loved up with his gf. They personalities are much the same as they were as babies.

Comfort milk and gripe water were absolute gamechangers for us, but more importantly - gather whatever strength you have left and speak to the GP and/or health visitor. Don’t accept no for an answer.

There’s a reason behind this, you will get there, and this will pass eventually.

Oh you poor thing, you must be at the end of your tether. Eight hours of your crying newborn is pure stress.
I agree with other posters - it sounds like colic and reflux. Babies feel comforted by sucking so often seem like they are hungry all the time when they have silent reflux.
DS had this problem and we found switching to an anti-reflux formula helped. Also, wedges in his cot (under the mattress) and pram to prop up his head slightly (you can buy NHS recommended ones). You could also speak to the HV about baby massage, this helped relieve DS's trapped wind and also helped us to bond. Friends have taken their babies to the cranial osteopath and had great success.
Today though, try to take a break if you can. If DP / your parents/ a friend can look after the baby for a few hours whilst you gather a bit of strength take that option! You'll be completely frazzled after last night.

Was just coming on to also suggest comfort milk. My eldest had comfort milk from around 4 weeks. We did also use the Dr Brown's bottles and together it worked - almost immediately and felt like magic. Good luck - try and share the care today to make sure that you're looking after yourselves too. Tired mum (and dad) are no good to look after baby.

Have you tried probiotic drops for baby? Game changer for colicky baby for us (do your own research and check with gp first) Also not sure if relevant but I took lactulose once and I've never had such a painful stomach and cramps. Might not be the same for babies but I gave it to my youngest once and similar reaction he cried for hours, not sure if there are any gentler alternatives.

Only a monster would flame you for not realising how hard it is. I think most mothers would understand.

To be honest with you, I am not an expert, but if she has cried for 8 hours without sleeping, I would feel that something is up. Your GP needs to be doing more.

Some doctors will not link the constipation with CMPA but this was what happened with us.

Please push for a CMPA formula to trial - if you see improvement they can prescribe long term.