Incredibly worried about 15 month olds development

[Jessicalee478]

I am feeling incredibly worried about my 15 month old boys development. Just after his first birthday he had a really odd few weeks where he basically stopped babbling and interacting. It was horrific and I felt at the time I had lost my boy. At the time my GP referred us to a paediatrician (waiting on appointment) and I had his hearing checked which was all fine. After this period he slowly started interacting again but I still feel in my gut that he is potentially showing early signs of ASD. He does now babble again but it appears very much to be either random babble to himself whilst playing or mumum to get my attention if he wants something or wants to point something out to me. There is not and I am not sure there ever has been really any socially directed babble. He has never babbled where it kind of sounds like they are trying to say something with intonation. We have started private speech therapy and I have noticed he is starting to make some new noises with his babbling but it is still very very basic and inconsistent. He is not affectionate and will not make eye contact while being held although when he is engaged and interacting he makes beautiful eye contact. He has picked up makaton well over the past few weeks and is consistently using about 8 signs so far. He loves peekaboo, this little piggy and will ask for more more when I am finished. He appears to have good receptive language, can follow simple instructions ie get your shoes, sit down, go and put this in your room etc. He can shake his head no appropriately to answer questions and has just this week started to nodd yes to questions if he wants something. He waves, points everything out to me, is very very good at getting his point across if he wants something, is fairly good at imitation ie clapping, stamping feet, pointing to body parts etc as well as if I model something with a toy he will generally repeat straight away. He can point to a few body parts when asked and say meow and moo consistently in context. I am aware he is doing so so many positive things but I just can't shake the feeling that something is missing communication wise. The richness and easy flow of back and forth communication just does not seem to be there? I feel that I have to work very hard to get and keep his engagement and I don't feel it should be this hard? Please help. I am worried sick. Any advice appreciated.

from what I read from your post your baby seems to be very developed for his age. He is still very young and you should't expect a steady flow of communication. At that age their behavior can sometimes change but it doesn't mean its a cause for concern. I wouldn't worry.

All I'm getting from your post is your anxiety. Have you seen your GP about your reactions?

You get a huge range of development at this stage and he sounds like he's doing fine to me. My DS didn't say anything till nearly 3, his best friend was a chatterbox from about 1. Now 4, you can't tell a difference between them.

He sounds completely fine for a 15 month old, trust me I've been there. My older one is now 7 and he has some diagnoses and he wasn't doing any of that at that age. Keep an eye on him but try not to let it ruin this time with him with so much worry.

I should add as well I have noticed that he has occasionally started to cover hold one hand up and sort of cover his ear to certain noises especially running water ie when the shower and bath is running. He is also very repetative in his play. Ie opening and closing doors, light switches etc. Most days when I walk into his room to get him up from his nap or in the morning he does not make eye contact with me at all but will point at the light obsessively to me before even looking at me. I have read posts about regressions in autistic children and I guess my fear is that he is showing some early signs and that a massive regression is in the horizon and he is going to loose all his amazing skills that he has learnt. I am not naturally an anxious person but have got myself in a real state over this.

I don't disagree with you! I am not naturally an anxious person but yes I have got myself in a real state over this and have seen my GP for some anti anxiety medication to help. I just don't know how he can go on to develop language when his babble is so limited and he doesn't appear to be using it in a socially directed way at ALL. Sime days I will hear a new sound (ie) yaya once but then will not hear it again. He is a very quiet, very passive boy. Did your little one babble a lot at this age?

So what does the speech therapist say
Ask this professional who has seen your child
They can do standardised assessments

I can't believe a speech therapist has taken on a 15 month old.

Goodness, not sure how I feel about a private speech and language therapist taking your money for a 15 month old, especially one who sounds like they are developing almost completely as expected (if not above expected). As a PP has said, surely they are the best person to ask?

Does you little one have interaction with other toddlers?
What helped my little one was going to nursery, their speech is evolving daily now!

But also agree with the other posters, that there doesn't sound as of there is anything to be concerned about!

Having ASD is not the worse thing that can be wrong with your child. My DC babbled, had eye contact met all milestones at that age but was diagnosed at 10 with ASD. DC is a teen has friends, goes to mainstream school and will go to uni and he is a joy. Go to your GP for anxiety.

Honestly I trust your instincts as a mum and it does sound like it could be ASD. This is why there was the MMR link as it can often occur that typical development can suddenly become atypical at around 14 months which is coincidentally when the MMR used to be so people thought there was a link but really it would have happened.
my relative who is autistic had clear issues from around that age and yet seemed fairly typical up until his 1st birthday.
He is still your baby though and he won’t be lost to you even if he does turn out to have Autism. It sounds like he had many lovely traits and I don’t expect they will be lost at all… perhaps speak to your HV or GP to ask to begin to get some further assessments and support as these things can take a long long time so better to get the ball rolling even if it turns out to not be needed.

My DF only started speaking at three years old and is fluent in three languages. I think you are massively overreacting.

I think for 15 months he sounds like he is doing brilliantly. Please stop worrying. Do you have autism in your family is that why you are so worried ? He sounds advanced for his age if anything. I work with autistic children and I would not be worried by anything you have said at 15 months

I think he sounds completely normal and this is anxiety at play.

From your description OP it sounds to me like he is not only meeting age-related expectations developmentally but in fact exceeding them. Nothing strikes me as a red flag here and the hugely reassuring elements are the desire to communicate, the excellent receptive language and the comprehension skills. The presence of shared attention / declarative pointing is also very reassuring.

Is this a HCPC-registered SALT ?

From what you have said your 15 months communication skills are exceptional. No professional should be taking your money and feeding into your unfounded anxiety like this.

You might be better off paying to see a family therapist. You might be unintentionallly affecting your interactions with your boy due to the way you are interpreting his responses... One of the potential risks is that he ends up with a narrative about him that there is something "wrong" with him. A family therapist will help you think about different ways of understanding what's happening and look for ways to help you and dealwith it, diagnosis or no diagnosis.

We have only had two sessions with her 4 weeks apart so far. She said he is far too young for intensive speech therapy (which I totally agree with) but she has worked with us on increasing his engagement and some simple strategies to help support language. At home and very very play based he actually loves it. But yes it is very expensive 😪. We are in New Zealand so I'm not sure if it is a little different over here but the speech therapists don't diagnose as such but she did say she agrees he is showing some subtle signs just in terms of his engagement and the fact that he zones out frequently and stares out the window (what she thinks is visual stimming) when overwhelmed. He also will often turn his back to me when playing rather than actively bringing me into his play and like I say I have to work very hard. I guess I just wondered if anyone else has had a similar experience. I have gone down the correct avenues in terms of paediatric referral etc but in the meantime I am driving myself mad.

He honestly sounds totally normal and if anything advanced. The stuff you say about his "play being repetitive"- have you been around many young toddlers? I don't mean that in a patronising way but it's very hard to get perspective when you only know your own child. Doors, switches, they all love that shit- it's a phase. My son is OBSESSED with opening and shutting doors; I'm not remotely worried about him. (If he's still only playing with the door when he's 2 and a half then maybe I will be!!) Also think you're expecting too much of his speech at this age. Really, try to step back from this. It sounds like you've got yourself in a state about it (I know what this is like) needlessly.

what exact form does “working hard” with a toddler take ?

That sounds worryingly intense and controlling

He sounds very normal OP.

zones out frequently and stares out the window (what she thinks is visual stimming) when overwhelmed.

Thats normal, and why is she overwhelming him? Your baby absolutely doesn’t sound behind, and babies all develop at different stages. It’s good that you’ve got a paediatrician referral if you are worried, but I’d stop putting so much on him, he’s just a baby, repetitive play and liking lights is normal. Mine would ignore me to watch the washing machine for hours at that age.

Very, very kindly - I'd be worried about you, not your boy.

No, no babbling. Just said "car" one day and we went from there.

I think you're expecting him to play like an older child: engaging with others and concentrating for longer periods. They don't. My niece is 18mo, she spent the whole of our jubilee party emptying my kitchen cupboards, ignoring everyone else. They don't understand "play" as we understand it as adults. I'd just leave him to it and have a cup of coffee!

has he had a recent hearing test? he could have glue ear from an infection which would explain some things.