Just an experience I'd like to share.

[Cappuccino17]

Once i was abroad with my husband and 18 month old daughter. Our 1st holiday away. We had booked for 10 days and she was teething practically all the way from day 1. She'd cry non stop I literally felt like crying too as I'd wanted a break and didn't expect this to be a stressful holiday. I gave her calpol which settled her and so she could actually enjoy the holiday too. We did a lot with her day in day out the whole holiday was centred around her. On day 8 we booked a restaurant for a romantic meal. We dressed up and took our daughter with us. We literally just wanted 1 peaceful meal between us with a chat. So we took the ipad along. We made sure she ate first. When our food arrived we put the ipad on and let her watch rhymes. But we couldn't help but notice many families around us staring in disgrace and whispering. They were from other parts of the world but I felt very uncomfortable. 1 lady in particular was glaring and shaking her head at us. When I say staring i mean very obvious staring from many people. I felt so uncomfortable. Like I couldn't relax. When we finished and switched off the ipad which my daughter was so content watching. They stopped staring but loved my daughter and smiled. So it was kind of a happy ending. Still shocks me till today lol.

[SallyWD]

I think it's fine OP UNLESS other tuners really could hear the songs, then it's not OK! If they couldn't hear it, your daughter was happy and you got to enjoy your meal then great!

[SallyWD]

Diners not tuners!

[FiveNineFive]

I'd have judged you too

[Cappuccino17]

It wasn't on loud as my daughter prefers watching the images. I couldn't hear it so don't know how other diners could.? The restaurant music was blaring and the tables were spread apart just for some context.

[noborisno]

@MolliciousIntent

I'm assuming you were in Europe? They have a very different attitude to children than in the UK, they include them as part of the family at meals out rather than trying to keep them quiet and distracted. So you taking the iPad off your daughter and engaging with her during the meal would have met with their approval.

I've always included my daughter as part of the family WTF?

[Cappuccino17]

Besides I wouldn't be that inconsiderate to spoil another person's evening.

[Cappuccino17]

It was a one off so really don't feel bad. Our daughter is a huge part of out lives. For 40 minutes she watched some rhymes. I thought all mums would do this atleast once in thier motherhood lol I'm shocked.

[donchafeellikecrying]

@Cappuccino17

Yes I imagine we ve all done it at some point but not in restaurant? I think that's the issue

[MermaidSwimming]

I've never done screens in restaurants because I find it awful having to listen to it from other people.

[Cappuccino17]

Oh okay. Yeah I wouldn't have had it loud no way. I'd feel awful doing that !

[Cappuccino17]

I think I'd definitely do it again. No regrets.

[EarringsandLipstick]

We had a romantic moment which was lovely.

Good for you. You disturbed the other diners' experience in the process. Seriously, unbelievable entitlement.

[EarringsandLipstick]

thought all mums would do this atleast once in thier motherhood lol I'm shocked.

Why?

Some parents do. Some don't. But it's not shocking that many parents make choices - if they're not happy to get a babysitter for an evening - romantic, as you call it - meal, they don't go. Or they make sure that if they bring their DC it's not a disruption to other people dining. Your desire to have a lovely moment with your child doesn't trump their reasonable expectations for a meal minus children's nursery rhymes

[EarringsandLipstick]

@Cappuccino17

I think I'd definitely do it again. No regrets.

Ok so. You keep saying this. Not sure why you posted then 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Cappuccino17]

I posted just to get an idea of what other mums do. But honestly I respect all mums as dynamics are so different in each family and all children are different too.
I didn't disturb the other diners the ipad wasn't on loud for the millionth time. I was just confused about the glares when I wasn't disturbing anybody.
The person who wrote it must be a cultural thing has made the most sense to me. Because prior to that I was a little baffled by the situation.

[Bornsloppy]

No I don't park my children in front of a screen so I can talk to my husband/friend/parents, we include our children, we bring a small bag of toys for them to play with each.

The only time they use a phone or iPad to watch something is when I'm cutting their nails, and I certainly don't do that at the dinner table.

[LittleBrenda]

Haven't you ever seen other people with children in public before? People talk to their children, that's what they do.

[knockyknees]

I'm not the type to cause a scene or spoil an evening

You ARE the type to spoil an evening - other peoples' evenings by subjecting them to the noise from the ipad.

I didn't disturb the other diners the ipad wasn't on loud for the millionth time. I was just confused about the glares when I wasn't disturbing anybody.

You DID disturb the other diners, hence them looking at you because they see/hear where the racket was coming from. I don't care if someone uses a screen for their child - so long as it's on silent/headphones. None of the other diners would have even been aware of the ipad had you not rudely forced your noise on them. There is NEVER an excuse to subject other people to your noise.

Stop being so rude and selfish and learn to use the mute button on devices.

[clickbaitcow]

op it's fine as long as you don't have the iPad on so loud which you have stated a million times anyway lol. You're on holiday with an 18 month old and having a meal in the evening which you normally wouldn't do at home anyway. Same as people who get so drunk on holiday wouldn't binge drink everyday back at home. Or the fact that I don't allow my dc to have ice cream everyday but would treat him on holiday or some family outing. So basically, It's either you have a room service on holiday or that you take the iPad with you to sedate the toddler so you can have a meal as you know a chit chat about climate change or rainbows isn't going to entertain your toddler or colouring books. Parents that are actually switched on 24/7 engaging with their babies and toddlers reminds me of Ricky Gervais's after life cafe scene. I wouldn't judge you at all and will secretly applaud you for your bravery for taking a 18 month old on a family holiday on your own with your husband without a army full of in-laws, grandparents, aunts and uncles and nannies. Only small minded people who come from small places would judge you.

[Cappuccino17]

@clickbaitcow exactly right! Finally someone who is like minded.

[EarringsandLipstick]

will secretly applaud you for your bravery for taking a 18 month old on a family holiday on your own with your husband without a army full of in-laws, grandparents, aunts and uncles and nannies

Huh? Bizarre thing to say - most parents take their own children on holidays, on their own.

[LollyGrabbing]

@EarringsandLipstick

will secretly applaud you for your bravery for taking a 18 month old on a family holiday on your own with your husband without a army full of in-laws, grandparents, aunts and uncles and nannies

Huh? Bizarre thing to say - most parents take their own children on holidays, on their own.

I agree. I must have known hundreds of 18 month olds in my time. None of them have needed hordes of people to manage them on a holiday.

[LegsOfJelly]

I really don't think that having toddlers being included as part of an evening meal is a specifically European thing! My kids were always part of meals, including in restaurants, when they were little.

While I agree that staring at you is rude, I would find it a bit strange to see an 18 month old in front of an ipad.

[LookAtHetGo]

Some parents use screens to occupy their children when they're out, some don't. I think the same can be said for most aspects of parenting. Different families do things differently.

If you and your DH are happy with what you're doing, do it. No one else's opinion matters.

[EarringsandLipstick]

If you and your DH are happy with what you're doing, do it. No one else's opinion matters.

In general matters of parenting, absolutely.

In terms of choices that affect others, no. You need to consider the impact of a toddler watching an iPad in a (I'm assuming, as OP says it was a romantic meal) nice restaurant while their parents enjoy their meal & chat. It's really unfair to other diners.