What was the worst and best thing about being a new parent?

[toastedcat]

Just that, really. I'm due June 13th.

I keep thinking I'm sort of ready for it and then panicking massively when I realise that life is going to change so dramatically!

However, one thing that I'm hoping might work for me is that I'm very happy being at home -- I work from home, I'm used to a quiet lifestyle (Covid shut socialising down and then I never really got back out there because we moved out of London).

I'm hoping that, because there won't be a huge transition into spending a lot of time at home, the transition might be okay?!

Anyway, let me know what your best and worst parts of the first few months were...

Sleep deprivation was really bad last time. A lot of women get post partum nightmares. I gave myself anxiety had high bp and tachycardia which had me back in hospital 3 days after birth.

You might not feel like yourself, like you’ve lost your identity completely, can’t get a minute to yourself. You’ll fight ridiculous amounts with your partner and detest him for having as many poos as he wants in peace without having to ask permission.

You may find you want/need to get out of the house too. I had PPD with my first which wasn’t sorted until my first was 2. My experience with my second born, though tough, is a whole other level and I just wish I’d asked for help at the time.

All that being said, being a mother has been the best thing I’ve ever done.

Best: soft baby hair and skin, cuddles, little baby clothes, when you feed them in the middle of the night and it's like you're the only two people awake (this feeling goes after a few months 😆), when random people tell you how gorgeous your baby is even though they look like a cross potato, when you feel a bit better and get to take them out for long strolls in the buggy

Worse: pain, those first poos (yours and babies), lochia, never being able to leave the house quickly, sleep deprivation, dry hands from endless hand and bottle washing, never quite being sure if you're doing the right thing.

I've got two and my favourite thing second time round was how in love my eldest was with the baby. That was adorable.

Best: soft baby hair and skin, cuddles, little baby clothes, when you feed them in the middle of the night and it's like you're the only two people awake (this feeling goes after a few months 😆), when random people tell you how gorgeous your baby is even though they look like a cross potato, when you feel a bit better and get to take them out for long strolls in the buggy

Worse: pain, those first poos (yours and babies), lochia, never being able to leave the house quickly, sleep deprivation, dry hands from endless hand and bottle washing, never quite being sure if you're doing the right thing.

I've got two and my favourite thing second time round was how in love my eldest was with the baby. That was adorable.

Worst: The absolute terror that I was now responsible for this tiny human.
Best: She was born in winter in the midst of lockdown so I was able to spend days in my pjs snuggled up with her on the sofa with not expectations of going anywhere or people dropping by.

Worst was sleep deprivation and my first DC was a really unsettled young baby, who cried a lot, which was tough. Also new wrinkles.

but so many wonderful bits. Amazing to watch them learn new skills and develop their own personalities. Absolutely loved contact naps and breastfeeding. Loved baby groups and long walks. Love holding them close. And when they see you, their face lights up in such a magical way - it is pure love.

Worst was sleep deprivation and my first DC was a really unsettled young baby, who cried a lot, which was tough. Also new wrinkles.

but so many wonderful bits. Amazing to watch them learn new skills and develop their own personalities. Absolutely loved contact naps and breastfeeding. Loved baby groups and long walks. Love holding them close. And when they see you, their face lights up in such a magical way - it is pure love.

Worst was sleep deprivation and my first DC was a really unsettled young baby, who cried a lot, which was tough. Also new wrinkles.

but so many wonderful bits. Amazing to watch them learn new skills and develop their own personalities. Absolutely loved contact naps and breastfeeding. Loved baby groups and long walks. Love holding them close. And when they see you, their face lights up in such a magical way - it is pure love.

Worst was sleep deprivation and my first DC was a really unsettled young baby, who cried a lot, which was tough. Also new wrinkles.

but so many wonderful bits. Amazing to watch them learn new skills and develop their own personalities. Absolutely loved contact naps and breastfeeding. Loved baby groups and long walks. Love holding them close. And when they see you, their face lights up in such a magical way - it is pure love.

Sorry for posting a billion times. This new MN is a bit shit.

Best things:

• I adored my baby, could just be happy staring at him. All I wanted was for him to be happy which meant that when he was asleep/full/giggling etc I was ecstatic


• Loved the physical sensation of breastfeeding


• Quite enjoyed watching tv for 3 months as all my baby wanted to do was snooze on me and feed.

Worst thing: lack of sleep, loss of a respected career.

My baby was beautiful and people brought me cake. The rest was all pretty shit tbh (it got better).

I was actually pleasantly surprised at the amount of sleep I could survive on.

My DS used to wake every 2-3 hours, and then started waking every 30 mins through the night.

I would go to bed at 8pm to get some sleep, DH would have DS downstairs until midnight, so at least I’d had a little bit of sleep ahead of being awake most of the night.

I very much enjoyed the 4 weeks of maternity leave I had before DS was born.

My DS is one now and this bit is my favourite so far, he runs to me for a hug and smiles at me. He was always grumpy when he was a baby and not that interested in me and DH, but he seems to like us now!

Worst was sleep deprivation and my first DC was a really unsettled young baby, who cried a lot, which was tough. Also new wrinkles.

but so many wonderful bits. Amazing to watch them learn new skills and develop their own personalities. Absolutely loved contact naps and breastfeeding. Loved baby groups and long walks. Love holding them close. And when they see you, their face lights up in such a magical way - it is pure love.

Worst ... was stitches and peeing!

Best... the feeling of love you get and how cute the smallest simplest thing they do is!

Congrats and good luck.... try to enjoy every minute

Worst ... was stitches and peeing!

Best... the feeling of love you get and how cute the smallest simplest thing they do is!

Congrats and good luck.... try to enjoy every minute

Best bit for me is the early weeks where all I was expected to do was feed the baby. I spent endless hours in a blissful bubble with my new baby, either camped out on the sofa with baby on my chest, watching boxset after boxset while I had snacks and drinks delivered to me by my exH who took care of literally every other aspect of our lives while he was on paternity leave.
Worst bit is definitely being so sleep deprived that you can’t think straight.

Best bit for me is the early weeks where all I was expected to do was feed the baby. I spent endless hours in a blissful bubble with my new baby, either camped out on the sofa with baby on my chest, watching boxset after boxset while I had snacks and drinks delivered to me by my exH who took care of literally every other aspect of our lives while he was on paternity leave.
Worst bit is definitely being so sleep deprived that you can’t think straight.

Worst was honestly the initial shock of having a tiny human to look after all the time when I first got home, the loneliness, the worrying about them all the time (for me, unreasonably sometimes) and how long it takes to leave the house.

The best is everything else, the cuddles, watching them grow and develop, the first smile and that belly laugh! Seeing their personalities come out and I've met a lovely new mum friend too as many of my friends don't have children yet.

Worst was sleep deprivation and my first DC was a really unsettled young baby, who cried a lot, which was tough. Also new wrinkles.

but so many wonderful bits. Amazing to watch them learn new skills and develop their own personalities. Absolutely loved contact naps and breastfeeding. Loved baby groups and long walks. Love holding them close. And when they see you, their face lights up in such a magical way - it is pure love.

Worst was sleep deprivation and my first DC was a really unsettled young baby, who cried a lot, which was tough. Also new wrinkles.

but so many wonderful bits. Amazing to watch them learn new skills and develop their own personalities. Absolutely loved contact naps and breastfeeding. Loved baby groups and long walks. Love holding them close. And when they see you, their face lights up in such a magical way - it is pure love.

Worst was sleep deprivation and my first DC was a really unsettled young baby, who cried a lot, which was tough. Also new wrinkles.

but so many wonderful bits. Amazing to watch them learn new skills and develop their own personalities. Absolutely loved contact naps and breastfeeding. Loved baby groups and long walks. Love holding them close. And when they see you, their face lights up in such a magical way - it is pure love.

Worst bit was the newborn period. DS was really unsettled, cried a lot, didn’t sleep and breastfeeding was really hard. First 6 months were the absolute pits and I thought I had ruined my life.

He grew out of it thankfully. By 1 he was an absolute legend and age 1-2 has been the best year of my life. Toddlers are hard work but amazingly fun and his sheer excitement over seemingly mundane things takes my breath away daily.

Worst
It's unrelenting and tiring. I remember telling my childless friend that DS needed feeding pretty much every 2-3 hours, no matter night or day and she was aghast 😂
It can be a bit isolating. Even if you're used to being home/alone often, it felt different for me.
After pains!!! I was doubled up on the floor with DH about to take me to a&e on day 3. Like labour again

Best
You've got this tiny, amazing human and you know you are absolutely everything to them.
Sleepy newborn cuddles
Amazing watching them grow, learn and develop new skills

Good luck! And try to enjoy it all x

Worst is the sleep deprivation, some people get lucky and their babies sleep in a cot for hours at a time, but most don't, my first didn't sleep longer than 45 min at a time for a 2 months and needed held constantly, he got up to 2 hours by 4 months, but now at 3.5yr sleeps well.

The loss of spontaneity and the constant thinking of someone else is really hard at first, but now we have 2 I'm more used to it.

The baby snuggles are the best!! And their cute little coos and happy noises they make. I'm snuggled into my 18 week old right now and he's lovley. He has started to be really good fun to play with and watching my toddler and him interact is lovley!

Worst? The feeling of not having your own time for ages. The sleep deprivation. The sheer panic that something bad is going to happen. The resentment towards DH no matter how helpful they are, they will NEVER feel the same crushing responsibility. The near constant googling.
The best? Where to start. The absolute overwhelming love. The fascination of watching them grow and develop. The cuddles and kisses. The sheer joy of childhood fun - I may have aged physically but oh how I love rediscovering joys of christmas, of playgrounds, of jumping around and being silly!