I wish someone had told me ......

[Willowmum]

I still meet up with my NCT antenatal class and we were talking about this the other day. What's the one piece of advice on caring for your baby you wish you'd been given at your antenatal class?

I wish someone had told me:
1 - RELAX!! It's quite good fun really!
2 - You'll only use that massive, expensive monstrosity of a pram for 12 weeks. As soon as your baby can be propped upright you'll buy a cheap lightweight stroller!

Anyone got any more?

Distracted, you're so right. There's a conspiracy to keep it quiet, and it doesn't help. I asked my sister whether she'd found bf painful at first or not. She thought for a moment, then said 'well, imagine your nipples have been superglued to the back bumper of a lorry - and then it drives off'. I felt much better, put up with it a bit longer and it all came right. What she didn't tell me was that, after a year, it would be me crying buckets when my baby lost interest.

Something that somebody did tell me after crying down the phone to a dear friend about BF every hour day and night for a month etc etc etc was "you are not super woman, do what you have to do to get through"
This gave me permission to abandon all of my theories on what i as a "good" mother should do/be like. ie get up, dressed, hair washed and combed every morning before 9am, breakfast pots be washed soon after, house clean and tidy in case of visitors, baby sparkling clean and happy smillie always....blah blah blah.
The best piece of wisdom i ever recieved.

Ooh I agree with the breastfeeding advice! When I hear people say "If she's latched on properly then it won't hurt..."

LIES ALL LIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How never ever in my life have i had such overwhelming feelings of amazing love and warmth towards another human bieng as i have toward DS.
Having said that, how could any one put that into words and make you feel it.

Also something i wish someone hadn't told me...that giving birth was like a rhinoserus going through a cat flap. Eeeeak

make the most of the time before they learn to talk!coz there will come a time when you wish they hadnt,when they get to the "why"stage

Another vote for the bf one - I was convinced I was doing it wrong for ages, drove the MW to distraction pestering for help, thinking dd wasn't latched properly.

I was also expecting parenting to be hell on a stick for about 5 years. I had visions of looking after a helpless bundle for years on end and getting very little back (not sure how I agreed to getting pg in the 1st place!) In the end was surprised by how wonderful dd is and how interactive she was even from the start.

Plenty of people told me it would be like that - I just didn't listen!

Agree DonBean....it's that feeling that they have only just landed in your life and yet you would walk out in front of a bus for them. I likened it to being mugged by baby love.

Also wish some one had said that all baby books are written for the middle common denominator. Thou shall not microwave the babies bottle....wrong.....microwave it if you have to and then shake it like buggery to remove any hotspots.

The best pieces of advice were, sleep when they sleep.......and make a list of 10 things you want to do that day............draw a line through 9 of them and try and do one, then try and do two etc etc.,

wish someone had told me to SLEEP ALL THE TIME before first baby is born... god i weasted so much time awake

also spent a lot of time during preg trying to get an idea of the nature of labour pain - was so frightened it would be like being sliced or breaking a bone - i think although it must be diff in intensity for all the ache and constipated feeling is describable and i would have felt more empowered if i had a handle on it before

ditto on brest feeding - jesus it was worse than labour (almost)

learn to trust your instincts and dont let hv's boss you around

tell people how they can help you and dont be stressed b politness - tell them to go if it too muc, or to make tea for themselves

your frinds will prob change