Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

I have 7 chilren some still very small and have been through most trials

44 replies

saff · 05/01/2008 11:13

although i am sure there will be more i have had 6 very different labours had 2 miscarrages and have a foster child (no7) i am sure i still have lots to learn as each child is new and unique but if i can give any wisdom that i have gained along the way i would love to help xx

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
nobodysfool · 05/01/2008 19:24

You gem let me think....there are so many questions i would like the answers to....tonights lotto numbers please?
Oh i know,my ds is 31 months and is refusing his cooked evening meal(unless its sausages,meatballs or hotdogs-yuck)he eats well the rest of the day.
I have now taken the attitude if you dont eat it your not that hungry so you can go without.He is THE most stubborn lo and wont even put the food in his mouth he just says "no eat".So he goes without.
I have tried giving him his cooked meal at lunch but he still doesnt want it then i have a really grumpy ds all afternoon.I have tried us all eating together-no diff,and even making pretty pics out of the food on his plate.
Have you got any words of wisdom?

pirategirl · 05/01/2008 19:26

hiya, hat off to you.

My daughter has the palette of a gnat. She has never eaten, tried or enjoyed to any degree vegetables or fruit.

I gave up trying 2 yrs ago.

Do you think she will ever take an interest in such things??

needmorecoffee · 05/01/2008 19:26

ok. Do teenagers ever help in the house? mine just say 'in a minute' and I end up geting fed up and doing it. (I have 3 teenagers)
Plus, dd is nearly 4 and still co-sleeps. But she has seizures so not sure how safe she'll be in her own bed. But getting fed up with sharing a bed now.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

saff · 06/01/2008 00:55

to q a i would say no child will stave themselves to death best carry on with what you are doing and dish up the meal eat yours with him and when finished take it away with no fuss at all no food in between and no milky to q b i would say no teenagers do f all mine pain in arse think we just have to live through it. My daughter is epileptic so know how you feel on worry front you could try a little camp bed to move away from co sleeping but still keep an eye on your lo

OP posts:
candypandy · 06/01/2008 01:00

do you tell off your children every day? i sometimes think i should have stopped telling them off by now except every now and again. is this realistic?

TrinityRhinosDhWonHerAnIPOD · 06/01/2008 01:08

Hiya, power to you for all you have done

ok maybe you can help with this
dd2 is pulling her hair out
it started out of the blue but was shortly before I gave birth dd3 (not sure if that has been the issue)

she completely stripped the side if her head in a very short time
she does it when she sucks her thumb so to go to bed, when shes tired, bored, upset etc.

the doc told me she would damage her follicles so we should shave her head to crack the habit
we did that
it was horrid for me I hated it but thought I was doing the right thing
5 months down the road she was still trying to find any hair from anywhere (under my pillow,off my clothes, out of a haribrush)

when she puls it out she wraps it around her finger of the hand that she siucks her thumb and strokes her nose
she was still managing to find hair with a shaved head and so I let her hair grow as I hated shaving her and thought that maybe it just wasn't going to help as she was still obsessed with hair

2 minths down the ine and after having visited my parents for the xmas holiday she has stripped the side of her head again (until xmas she had still been puling it out but only really taken off her sideburn IYSWIM)

I have started telling her to leave her hair in the daytime when I see her doing it but that wont work at night and I dont know if I should be doing that anyway
I dont know what to do
If she will damage her follicles by doing and I cant stop her an other way I will shave her head again
I can be sad about it away from her..
I really dont know what to do

TrinityRhinosDhWonHerAnIPOD · 06/01/2008 01:10

she is 2.9

Flllightattendant · 06/01/2008 07:50

Trin, what about giving her a hairbrush with lots of hair on it, to muck about with and pull? Or a doll with lots of hair?

Might it distract her?

Some kind of hat to stop her getting at her head - or would she just remove it and carry on?

Flllightattendant · 06/01/2008 07:50

I think you need to find an alternative that she responds to enthusiastically. No idea what though!

saff · 06/01/2008 08:58

this is actually really commen and i would guess your lo is a very sensitive soul. what has caused this is her reaction to a stressfull situation ie new baby and has become a habit which gets worse with stressful situations like xmas. The first thing is to break habit ie head shaving harsh but no other way then transfering habit on to another less drastic object like a doll she could maybe choose one and you could talk about her hair. The sort of child that does this usually is v bright and quite over sensitive to environment. You will need a strict routine and a chilled house for her to calm down abit this is not anything you have done just lo reaction to world. you will have to watch habit does not return
with nursery
I tell my kids off every day actually my mum still tells me off.Hope i can help here i have just finished degree and am training to be a baby whisperer am getting a bit of practice so you are helping me too x

OP posts:
TrinityRhinosDhWonHerAnIPOD · 06/01/2008 12:46

I really dont want to shave her head again

lulumama · 06/01/2008 12:54

hi trinity, my darling, i think your GP should refer you on somewhere, this sort of OC behaviour in a young child needs more advice than 'shave her head', as this clearly has not worked. maybe a referral to community paed, and take it from there.. can you braid her hair into really tight plaits so she cannot pull it? or lots of little plaits, or cornrow type thing? lots of children do compulsive type things when they are tired, commonly thumb sucking and nose stroking..but hair pulling is a different realm i think,. might be totally off here,but i think you need more specialised advice >

FluffyMummy123 · 06/01/2008 12:55

Message withdrawn

saff · 06/01/2008 17:41

icod i was not being flippant when i said that so sorry if you took offence i was meaning it from the point of view that the more attention a issue recieves the larger it sometimes gets also if you take note of all little bits that get nibbled through day can add up.

OP posts:
littlerach · 06/01/2008 17:52

Trinity, my friend's son did this for a long time and had a bald patch too.

She got osme very greasy serum and used that in large quantities and it did break the habit ofr a while.

I think he has almost stopped now.

saff · 06/01/2008 18:02

oh and please dont think i am setting myself up as some know all just today my own ds has drawn on walls eaten 2 spoons of yog and one grape drawn on wall again and one of them has given me nits so tonight will be combing through familys hair. just thought i would begin a thread.

OP posts:
nobodysfool · 06/01/2008 22:35
Grin
mumsville · 06/01/2008 22:58

I cosleep with my 19 month old son - he's outgrown got and too wee for the normal single bed.

I plan to try and get him to sleep in his own bed at 2 - will it be a nightmare.

Should I do controlled crying (bit nervous of it) or a softly softly approach?

Also a duffers guide to potty training a boy. He's been dry at night for since one but I plan to start at around two or so. What am I meant to do?

Thanks so much!

TrinityRhinosDhWonHerAnIPOD · 06/01/2008 22:58

do you think I've let her down/damaged her emotionally to make her do this I am filled to wsy past the top of my head with guilt about this

cadelaide · 06/01/2008 23:12

Trinity. I do know that guilt feeling. Dd, 6, also stripped one side of her head (shortly after birth of dc3, may have been connected, dunno).
We cut it really short and she stopped, I think also that being a bit older than your little dd she could see it didn't look great. So no advice, just sympathy about the guilt thing.
You know "Good Will Hunting", when Robin Williams says; "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault...."

TrinityRhinosDhWonHerAnIPOD · 06/01/2008 23:13

anybody there?
I'm making a doc app for her tomorrow
I'm scared of what I'm going to be told
Will they just tell me to shave her again
If I ask for more help will they think I've done something to her
surely she has to have something wrong qwith her (depression, anxiety, been fucked up by her mother..) for her to do this

help

TrinityRhinosDhWonHerAnIPOD · 06/01/2008 23:15

ooops sorry

thanks cadelaide

I've not seen 'good will hunting'
I think I should

Hmm if she was older it would help
I did try and have a chat about wanting long hair like a princess and she said she didn't want to be a princess so it didn't matter

cadelaide · 06/01/2008 23:21

No Trinity, did you not read my post?
It's not your fault.
My lovely hairdresser and lifelong friend told me, when dd was doing it, that she sees it such a lot and in all the cases she's seen it's always stopped. It's just a habit, not so different from my bf 18m ds constantly shoving his hands down my top and kneading my nipples, a comfort thing.
They may well tell you to shave again, and I do understand that that saddens you, but I really don't think it's a sign of any deep distress/condition.
I really don't.

cadelaide · 06/01/2008 23:21

oops.
x post.

cadelaide · 06/01/2008 23:26

It looks so awful doesn't it?
Dd looked so neglected, all the other girls with their glossy plaits and twirly pony tails and shiny tresses and there was dd with dry tufty bits and a big bare patch on one side.
It will pass.