Constantly on the go …is this normal?

[Saffrondoormouse]

My dd is 18 months and absolutely amazing but she is ‘on’ full pelt from the moment she wakes up until she sleeps and never sleeps for more than a 3 hour stretch at a time. Usually I can get her back to sleep with a bf but a few times a week she is fully up for the day at 3am all bright eyed and friendly,
I’m more than a bit frazzled.
I’ve been to a few baby groups recently and could not help noticing that she seems much more manic and full on than other toddlers her age and I’m a bit concerned.

At groups:
She refuses to join in circle time singing, preferring instead to return to playing and exploring at these times even if I try to engage in the singing alongside her to try and get her involved.

She will run off and engage in activities by herself for quite some time before checking where I am (I think most toddlers would want to check in to see where I am every few minutes especially in a new environment?)

At home:
She will try to climb up on everything all the time - we have to keep the chairs away from the dining room table as she will constantly climb up even though we tell her ‘no’ and put her down again. To my horror fell off once.

She absolutely hates her high chair to the point she screams if put in it. We have been trying a booster instead but she will only sit and eat nicely for a few minutes before trying to leave the table or climb up on it.

She hates her car seat and will scream on journeys of more than 10 mins or so.

She will try to run off if we are out and hates holding hands so I usually have to keep her in the buggy ir sling unless in traffics safe areas.

When the door opens she will try to slip past us to run out. She also tries the locks constantly if she’s near the hall so I have a safety gate to stop her going into the hall.

She is always looking for opportunities to grab things that she seems to know are contraband like the cats tail, permanent markers, people’s glasses, the loo brush, a night brace I wear for my teeth. These things are out out of her reach most of the time but the second they are not she will swoop in like she has some sort of toddler radar! She also has an amazing sense that enables her to appear whenever you are doing something interesting (to her) but not child friendly - loading the dishwasher with knives, cleaning the loo with bleach, trying to hoover the stairs with the stair gate open etc etc 😂
She wants to investigate absolutely everything!

Developmentally she seems to be fine -she started crawling and walking very early. She’s ok on language she has maybe 25 words total and is learning maybe one or two new words a week alongside babbling. She has two naps a day both for around 90 mins.
She eats well albeit not at the table for long and seems generally cheery …

Am I crazy for worrying? We do have autism in the family and I think some of these behaviours might tick some of the boxes?

Sounds like my dd2, she's now an officer in the navy.

My dd1 is autistic, she loved music time best and sat in the high chair/at her little table for hours out of choice "writing" aka scribbling. Dd1 had no speech until 4.

By the way, some little ones just are Duracell bunnies, they do calm down, but you need in the interim to guide them to take appropriate naps (not too many) and set reg flags where needed eg safety and extend high chair sitting for a little longer each time

@dipdye

She sounds like the type of kid that needs to be at the park, not baby groups.

It's not either-or. You can do both. And in January most of us wouldn't want to spend all day in the park, we can wrap up warm and go for a bit, but need indoor activities for the rest of the time. I've always chosen toddler groups carefully for my two, relaxed and free-flow type groups with space to run around and/or things to climb on.

She definitely sounds over tired! My ds gets super hyper when we mess with his sleep.

You need to push first nap back, as you do you will find it lengthens. Don't worry if you need to do bedtime super early for a couple of weeks. I think we had a few 5pm bedtimes during nap transition. This will sort itself out. Focus on her wake windows rather than the time on the clock.

At 18months ds dis 7pm-7am and nap 12-3. Not naturally a great sleeper but a lot of work put in from us!

Apart from the night waking she sounds similar to my 18 month old daughter.
I would recommend having a look at Montessori books or online. I found the ideas so helpful. Basically rather than make things “off limits” find safe ways your toddler can get involved . I find the Little Helper stand really good so she can stand next to me in the kitchen or at the bathroom sink. Eg When unloading the dishwasher I give her the cutlery basket (swiftly remove sharp knives) and open the drawer and while shes putting the cutlery away I get the rest of the stuff away.
As for the climbing we have a soft play annual membership! I also take cushions off the sofa and make slopes and steps with them for safe climbing. You can get those indoor toddler climbing frames.

@Vicky1989x

My DD was like this. She’s now 21 months and calmed down a lot, still a live wire but a bit calmer and interacting with other kids now.

As for the sleep, 2 90 minute naps at this age is quite a lot which is probably contributing to the night wakings.

Agree on the naps

My DS was very similar. But he was a good sleeper, probably cos he literally never stopped moving the entire time he was awake. He’s 6 now and is better but still very full on. I’d say he improved a lot from age 3

My DD was totally different. It was a revelation to me to be able to open the door and not have her immediately take off running. She never climbed the dangerous bits at the playground as she was too scared. DS was scaling them at 18m! Toddler group she’d actually participate sat on my lap, whereas DS just ran about trying to open cupboards and escape out the door.

Agree that nap transitions are hard. Power through and hopefully in a week or so it’ll settle down. We definitely did some 6pm bedtimes during nap transitions. Absolutely no late afternoon naps!! They will adjust but the first few days are hard

That's a lot of sleep in the day, I'd try and cut the morning one. I wouldn't bf at night either at 18 months of be concentrating on sleep. Good luck!

Cancel the cheque 🤣

Seems completely normal to me! They have a lot of energy at this age and it's really difficult to keep up, I'm sure you're doing a great job - please don't look for problems to add to your plate