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Original poster

Sil and the T-shirt continued.....

38 replies

seeker · 26/12/2007 22:19

I posted a while ago about the T shirt my sil gave my 12 year old dd. It said I love chocolate, shopping, shoes, handbags and men - as long as they are rich" I didn't like it but I was worried that I was being old fashioned and prudish. People on here seemed to agree with me.

We get on very well and, as she is not a native English speaker, she sometimes uses me as "cultural interpreter" when she doesn't understand something about life in England. I raised the subject of the t shirt with her and db tonight in those terms, thinking that perhaps she had bought it without understanding, but it turned out that they had thought it was really funny and that there was nothing wrong with it at all. They made me feel that I was prudish, silly and actually a bit irrational to thing that a 12 year old shouldn't go round with this slogan on her chest.

I would be interested to know whether people generally agree with me or with them. And if you agree with them, could you telly me why?

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Shitemum · 26/12/2007 22:22

I hate that sort of thing on a girl/woman of any age. Although it might be funny on a racy old lady, as long as she herself thought it was...of course.

AngharadGoldenhand · 26/12/2007 22:22

Wouldn't let my 13 yr old wear it.

Shitemum · 26/12/2007 22:23

and personally i never wear anything with stuff written on it, yuk

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theUrbanDryAdventCalendar · 26/12/2007 22:23

personally i think the t-shirt would be ok if it didn't have the bit about the men on it. in what world is it ok for a 12 year old to seem like she is interested in rich men?

but then, i may be way out of touch with today's 12 year old girls. i know i was shocked when i found out that the most wanted brand for girls in the 9-13 range was Playboy, so there you go...

moondog · 26/12/2007 22:24

Fucking awful.
i would rather go dogging with Rowamn Williams than allow any child of mine to wear something so cheap and vulgAR.

TenLordsaLapin · 26/12/2007 22:25

I have a mug that says something similar ("I like my coffee like my men - dark and rich") but then I am in my late 30s! No, I don't think it's appropriate for a child, and yes, I do think a 12 year old is still a child.

Most of the clothes for young girls seem designed to make them look older - why can't we just let them be children for as long as possible?

pistachio · 26/12/2007 22:25

This reply has been deleted

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WanderingHolly · 26/12/2007 22:25

I can't even begin to tell you the number of things that are wrong with that t-shirt, so the very thought of putting on a 12 year old......

I think your SIL may also need an "intelligence interpreter."

TenLordsaLapin · 26/12/2007 22:25

moondog, I'm so nominating that for quote of the week

pinkbubble · 26/12/2007 22:25

I would let my 13 yr old wear a T shirt that had "I love chocolate,shopping,shoes and handbags!"

Would certainly not want my 13 yr old anything to do with men at all! I do not think it is prudish one bit.

coldtits · 26/12/2007 22:26

I would explain that I don't want passing men to think my daughter is a child prostitute. Because 12 is a child.

I do find that using 'strong' words can make people see things in a different light sometimes.

differentbutthesame · 26/12/2007 22:27

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pinkbubble · 26/12/2007 22:28

Seeker, do they have children? In particular a daughter?

FrannyandZooey · 26/12/2007 22:29

because it is declaring to the world that your dd is interested in consumerism and, well, sex basically

that is baldly what it means

Original poster
seeker · 26/12/2007 22:34

They do have a daughter - she is 9 days younger than my dd - 12 this coming Saturday. Another thought I had was that perhaps their dd had bought it and they hadn't read it - but no, they had all read it and thought it was brilliant.

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seeker · 26/12/2007 22:36

Frannyand Zooey - that's what I thought, but they obviously thought I was dirty-minded to think that. Although what else it was supposed to mean I have no idea!

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FrannyandZooey · 26/12/2007 22:53

of course that is what it means

it isn't funny or appropriate for a young girl to wear

I'm sorry they have made you question your judgement on this

Original poster
seeker · 26/12/2007 23:03

Thank you -just the reassurance I need!

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Original poster
seeker · 27/12/2007 10:23

Oh Lord - db has just told my mother that I am being "typically ridiculous" and 'completely humourless"!

Families - who'd have them!

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littlelapin · 27/12/2007 10:26

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JodieG1 · 27/12/2007 10:26

I agree with you.

GrumpYULEhorsewoman · 27/12/2007 10:39

I have a 13 yr old DD and agree completely with you. There is no way on earth I would allow her to wear a slogan like that. It does send out the wrong message entirely. They are still children at 13, whatever anyone else says. They are still children until 16 in the eyes of the law, so parents are right to set moral boundaries. Some of the girls I see at DD's school make my eyes water - if they were out of uniform and pushing a pram through town you wouldn't look twice. Tis very difficult to find stuff that is both trendy and non-slutty when they get to that age, but it can (and in my house, will) be done. Stick to your guns, you are right.

dizzyblonde · 27/12/2007 10:57

I wouldn't want my nearly sixteen year old daughter to wear it, just asked her what she thought and got the reply " you've got to be joking, it's revolting, you only wear that sort of thing if you want people to think you're a brainless saddo who wants an rich old man!" Possibly a slightly over the top comment but I got the gist.

ggirlsbells · 27/12/2007 11:01

I wouldn't approve of my nearly 16yr old dd wearing it,but don't think she'd entertain the idea tbh.

I agree with you,your sil has warped ideas.Is this t-shirt marketed for children or in an adults size?

Magrat · 27/12/2007 11:03

your child is 12, she is on the brink of womanhood .. but womanhood is not merely the hormonal change of puberty .. it is a process that takes years to go through and brings with it an emotional intelligence and an ability to protect oneself

By dressing a child in an inappropriately sexualised t-shirt you are declaring to the world "I am a sexual being, look at me as a sexual being"

you are asking all who see to her to consider her as far older than she is

that is sad

that is crap parenting .. removing your ability, desire and right to protect your child

your DB and his wife must not have children .. they are being assinine in the extreme ...

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