Does it matter that my baby gets what it wants all the time?

[R1cciteddy]

Literally that, I give her what she wants so she stops crying and so we are both happy. Will she be a nightmare as she grows? she's almost 4 months

My main worry is she cosleeps and naps in a sling.

I will want some kind of life one day

Any tips from those that were too 'soft'

Ps the sling has been great for weight loss!!! So for that I would recommend

Rest assured you aren't raising a diva!!
At 4 months your baby needs you. Why have it if you aren't going to be there for it??
Imo!!

No. A baby's wants and needs are identical. You are meeting her needs. Love, security, nutritious food are all needs.

She’ll be well attached and happy and probably more independent as a result. She knows you’re there for her meeting her needs and that frees her up to develop and thrive.

Cosleeping and carrying your baby is the most natural way to parent, it’s how mums have cared for their infants since the dawn of human existence.

She’s tiny.

What are your worries? You don’t see many 10 year olds cosleeping or asking to be carried instead of walking.

I always gave my babies what they wanted as much as I possibly could. It's called meeting their needs. Aka parenting.

You're not 'giving her what she wants', you're meeting her needs.

Don't listen to nonsense about 'spoiling' her (if that's where this has come from).

IME the more their needs are met when they're little, the more happily independent they are when the time is right (for them).

You can't 'spoil' a 4-month old baby; all they want is to be warm, to be clean, enough sleep, enough food and plenty of cuddles.

Unless your 4 month old is demanding sports cars, designer clothes and to be carried around on a velvet cushion while rose petals are scattered, your mother needs to wind her neck in

My first baby slept like a dream. My 3 month old has decided that we're co-sleeping!

Don't beat yourself up! They need us. At this age they're telling us what they need, not what they want.

Sorry, my phone seems to have corrected 'demon' to 'mother' 🤭 🤫

You can’t spoil a baby. You’re building trust and emotional attachment. She will trust that if she cries or fusses, you or her father will respond and meet her needs.

Thanks... yes it's just what the 'oldies' say and friends seem to have babies in their cots straight away.

It seems like I'm only ever reassured I'm doing the right thing from posting on Mumsnet... I'm waiting for a critic!

I just try and go with what makes us all happy but sometimes I feel like I'm doing the wrong thing by taking the 'easy' route

@LadyMonicaBaddingham haha how did you know it was my mother

You’ll definitely still have a life one day. I co-slept with all mine and now my 11 year old barely wants me to kiss him goodnight! I’m definitely not still carrying him round in a sling. Believe me, it doesn’t last forever and you’re meeting your child’s needs as they come. She is only a tiny baby, you have nothing to worry about.

@LadyMonicaBaddingham just saw your second post, haha!!

Agree with all the other posters. A four month old baby cannot be 'spoilt.' They need to be warm, fed, clean, rested and loved. Also, they need to be entertained, to develop their brains properly but that only means simple, tactile toys and showing them the world around them.

They develop at an amazing rate at this age, and mental stimulation is vital.
You sound like a super mum.

I thought this would be about giving your 1YO unlimited chocolate because he was eyeing it up. Of course it’s fine to meet the needs of a 4MO baby. You’re going great!

At 4 months you absolutely can give them everything they want (need). But when they are older you can't it's part of setting boundaries, but 4 months old don't need boundaries. They just need love and care and milk

If she cried because she needed a nappy change you would not feel any guilt about doing so.

Same with her other needs. She’s still tiny, boundaries are for much later.

I don't believe you can spoil a baby. I always gave mine anything she wanted as soon as I could and she's healthy, happy and bright. Not in the least spoiled or selfish.

Far too young to be worried about such behavior. You are doing what needs doing for them when they are so young. Enjoy the closeness while it lasts, they soon grow up and don't want to be seen with you.

I'm not sure I phrased this very well!

Of course I have no problem with meeting her everyday basic needs... but am I doing the wrong thing by always taking the 'easy' option. ie putting her in the sling because she sleeps for longer rather than trying to get her accustomed to the cot, for example

Oh the whole 'you're making a rod for your own back' crap you mean?

No, you're fine. If you're child becomes a PITA, make sure you address it.

Plenty of absolute cunts had strict upbringings anyway.

Fucking hell what have you been reading?

They spend 9 months growing inside you are are pretty inept for the first 9 ish months. Of course they want to be close and not left in a solid cot on their own.

It’s fine, don’t stop doing what you’re doing and attending to her needs (that includes being close, being close is a need too).

No, it’s impossible to spoil a baby!

If you’re both happy, why change anything?

Also.. there is no easy route. It’s all hard in its own way