I feel like a failure

[Beenz523]

I feel like I'm failing my little one. He's 7 months old, doesn't roll or crawl and wakes frequently through the night. I know every child is different but my friend's baby of the same age is already nearly walking!

I feel so low because I feel like I'm failing him. What am I doing wrong?!

What am I doing wrong?!
Comparing your parenting, and your child to someone else's.

You are probably doing your best and are the best mum your baby could ever have.

Give yourself a break. He's only tiny. He'll be crawling in no time

First off, you are not failing. At all.
The worst thing to do is compare, easier said than done but honestly they all do it in their own time.
He's got plenty time.
Lots of tummy time, toys just out of reach to his side.
The crawling comes after, some don't even crawl.

I must be a failure too then as mine didn't do any of that by 6 months either.

You are tired because parenting is exhausting. If your friend is bragging stop seeing them so much. If it's all in your own head why not chat to your health visitor for reassurance.

My children never crawled. They were walking as normal by about 14 months.
Babies do different things at different times.
Your baby sounds utterly normal.
Waking at night - normal.
What wonderful things DOES he do?
I’m 99% sure he’s great.

Honestly do not compare. They all get there in the end.

Jesus I couldn’t think of anything worse than a walking seven month old!

DD didn't sleep through the night semi reliably till 2.5years. She did walk early but that's nothing to do with my parenting she was just determined to be a pain

Lots of children never crawl

And nothing you do is going to accelerate his muscle development beyond what is natural to him

At 7 months, some children are nearly walking, and some are lying on their backs watching the clouds go by.

All normal

You’re not failing, your baby is being completely average!

Stop comparing your child to others, babies who wak at 7 months are doing it very early!

Honestly lovely, have a word with yourself, give your head a shake, you’re doing grand, your baby is fine, you love him, he loves you, he’ll walk and sleep just when he’s ready to.

@KirstenBlest

What am I doing wrong?! Comparing your parenting, and your child to someone else's.

You are probably doing your best and are the best mum your baby could ever have.

Give yourself a break. He's only tiny. He'll be crawling in no time

This

Ah mate. I feel you. My 8mo baby only just started rolling and is nowhere near crawling. Can’t sit v well and in the throes of a sleep regression having never been much of a sleeper to begin with. We spent the day with a friend whose much younger baby is pulling up to sit, nearly crawling already and has always slept better. I was feeling pretty sensitive already today but ended up feeling even worse. So just here to sympathise and to say to you what I wish I could tell myself and believe - that they’ll all get there in their own time and it’s nothing they have or you haven’t done. Development is such a wide spectrum when it comes to milestones. I bet you couldn’t line up the adults you know in order of who walked first, could you?

DD1 never crawled. Wailed angrily in stranded frustration from sitting up at five months to cruising at ten months. Didn’t sleep through the night until after her first birthday.

This morning, aged 2.10, she scaled the shelves in the lounge to get at the confiscated tablet while I was on the loo. Tonight she begged to go to bed at 6pm, and we won’t hear a peep from her until at least 6am - and that’ll only be because she’s woken by her dad in the shower.

It’s utterly utterly shit feeling like you’re doing something wrong, because why else is your baby behind. Like everything else in parenting, in a couple of months it all will have changed and been forgotten.

My DS was the same. He's totally normal, a lovely bright kid. Enjoy watching your friend run round after a walking 7mo - I can't think of anything worse!!!

Well neither of mine walked until 14 months. My first woke in the night up to 18 months old every night, and my youngest still occasionally wakes up now at almost 18 months. Don't compare, it's unusual for a baby to be walking at seven months, and the waking in the night can be completely normal, your baby is still only very young.

Don’t blame yourself OP! There’s no reason for it. All children develop differently and get there in the end. Your DS will crawl and walk when he’s ready. I honestly think we have to respect our children’s timetable when it comes to things like this. What’s the hurry?

My DD is nearly 2 and started crawling / walking late. She’s getting much more confident now and it’s great to see. I didn’t ‘fail’ her as a mother, she was just going at her own speed developmentally.

The only thing you seem to be doing wrong is comparing your child/parenting skills with someone else

All babies are different and do things at their own pace

It must all fall in to place at some point because I've never seen a grown person crawling about town still drinking from a bottle

Don't be so hard on yourself

This might help. As part of the before bed bedtime routine, I suggest giving your baby a bowl of creamy porridge (my children liked Aptamil). They slept better with a fuller belly.

You are 100% not failing!

Another failure here then! DD had no interest in rolling and started crawling about 9/10 months from what I remember. Seven months is pretty early, isn't it? She walked at 14 months and is now 2.5, tears around at the speed of light and chats non stop.

They all do stuff at different times and it doesn't matter. No one is interested in what age you learned to crawl at.

And yes, walking early is a bloody nightmare. A friend's DD was walking at 9mo and she was bloody exhausted chasing her around. I was very glad of my little potato DD!

Nothing. I think walking at 7 months would be UNBELIEVABLY early. I had a friend whose baby was the first to hit every milestone and the first to be potty trained. Our kids are nearly 10 now and she’s a lovely but absolutely average child in every respect who is actually struggling a bit at school.

@Beenz523

I feel like I'm failing my little one. He's 7 months old, doesn't roll or crawl and wakes frequently through the night. I know every child is different but my friend's baby of the same age is already nearly walking!

I feel so low because I feel like I'm failing him. What am I doing wrong?!

@Beenz523 The only thing you’re doing wrong is expecting all children to do the same things at the same time ❤️ I’m sure your baby is doing absolutely fine! Mine was ‘late’ to roll, he could pull to stand and cruise round my furniture before he could crawl, decided to commando crawl for ages rather than proper crawl, and now at 10.5months hes waking like a champ 👍🏻 But he’s also climbing furniture, tearing my house apart within 2 seconds and trying to jump off my couch 😳 so honesty, I know it’s frustrating, but just appreciate what stage he’s at 😊

Give him as much tummy time as you can, place toys just out of his reach, he’ll figure it out in his own time 😊

You’re absolutely NOT failing him! I follow a children’s dietician on instagram who’s baby still barely touches most solid foods at 1 year old, and a trained nanny and teacher who’s baby never crawled and only walked at 16 months. These people are professionals in their area - think about it, if it was just down to what you were doing as a parent then these kids should be absolutely AMAZING at these things. They all get there in their own time 😊 and please remember that’s what your HV is there for too - if you have any concerns about his development then give her a call 😊

I never crawled and walked on my first birthday.

My friend had twins; one walked at just before 1, the other was nearer to 3.

All babies are different. My mother says I “never slept” . Maybe that’s why I’m short .

Honestly, OP, comparison is the thief of joy. Don't wish milestones away because God knows they go by so quickly anyway. Enjoy your child for who he is and respect his development and don't let anxiety ruin these early months for you both. There will always be someone's child who does things faster than yours, but it really doesn't matter in the end.

You're not doing anything wrong, your friends baby isn't almost walking because of anything she did! My DD didn't walk until she was 1 and barely crawled before that.