No preschool and joining Reception

[Sarajessgirl]

My DD is 3 years old and has joined preschool this month. I am a SAHM and feels I need to spend more time with her before she starts school next year. Is skipping preschool and going straight to reception a good idea ?

Following as I have wondered the same. My DD is also three and in a preschool at the school I'm hoping she gets in to. I think it's good to get them started, but I don't know if it's necessary. She only does three mornings a week whilst I'm working and that feels just right for me. Go with what feels right for you OP.

Absolutely no problem at all. Two weeks into term you'll probably be hard pressed to distinguish those who went to Nursery full-time, those who went to preschool and those who stayed at home.

What are the hours of preschool? If they’re shorter sessions and you have an extra day at home, the two of you, you’ll still get lots of time together

Could you not just do one or two full days and have the other 3 days at home with her? The social skills they pick up from pre school are very useful for reception.

I’d skip preschool in a flash in your circumstances. Reception is designed to teach your kids how to be ready for year one.

Main reason I sent mine was because they enjoyed it and did totally different things to what we did at home. It was only 15hrs.

But if your child doesn't enjoy it, its a different matter.

Mine went to playgroup for two mornings a week so he did get some socialisation but we skipped nursery altogether. He was absolutely fine.

Can you send her two or three mornings a week - will the children there be the ones in reception? Both of mine made friends in preschool they are still very close to now years later.

It does have to be all or nothing I think there are ways to get time with her and her gain from preschool

Depends if she's enjoying it, it would be mean to pull her out to meet your needs if she is getting something from it.

Contrast, but the current reception and y1 spent much of their preschool and nursery years in lockdown.
I certainly noticed the difference when my DD was allowed back to preschool. Our time together became so much more fun and interesting as she grew in her independence and experiences.

I just sent her for 3 days a week 9-3 term time as I was on mat leave and it was a great balance for us. Plenty of time together, but time alone while baby napped to get all the housework done!

I’m of a different opinion. I taught reception for a number of years & it was very obvious which kids had & hadn’t gone to some kind of pre-school setting. A real biggie was stamina. The pre-school/private nursery kids coped reasonably well with the 9-3.30 days, 5 days a week. They were tired, you could tell but OK. Those not in pre-school were exhausted. I cannot emphasise how tired kids with no pre-school experience were in the first half term. Settling took longer, they found the structured routine harder initially (ie. you must stop playing & sit down for snack or you must stop playing & sit still for 20 minutes in assembly). They also struggled more with sharing & and just ‘being’ around their peers. Obviously, it all evened out but the first term was harder 100%.

Find a balance maybe? It doesn’t have to be one or the other. My DD has just started school & I haven’t ‘lost’ her. We have a lovely hour snuggling watching TV 7am-8am. Then get ready & leave at 8.30am. And then home at 3.30 and 3 hours of playing & nattering before bath. It’s still lovely, still fun, still together. Why not do pre-school 3x days a week and then you’ll get 4x at home. Or any combination that gives you time together midweek. 🤷🏼‍♀️ Friends were/are so important to my DD. She adored pre-school because it was time with her little pals. She has always been really sociable & time with them & not just me was needed aged 3-4. It’s hard to let go as a parent but you have to think about what’s important & best for them too.

If I was in your situation (a SAHM) I would also want to spend as much time as possible with my three year old before they started school. They’ve got years and years of education ahead of them - enjoy this unique and special time together whilst you’ve got the chance.

@DominicRaabsTravelAgent

Absolutely no problem at all. Two weeks into term you'll probably be hard pressed to distinguish those who went to Nursery full-time, those who went to preschool and those who stayed at home.

Reception teacher here... yes it is very obvious which children haven't attended a setting before.. I'm not saying it's a bad thing before anyone jumps down my throat,

I do think there is a great benefit of some form of part-time preschool., a few mornings, a day... the social aspect really makes a difference!

But it certainly won't do your daughter any harm staying with you however a few hours a week means you get the best of both worlds and will help that transition into reception.

Personally I think you're putting your needs before your DDs.

She doesnt need to go to pre-school full time, but I do think she needs to go.

I think she needs to go to preschool but not full time. I sent ds 3 days a week so he could get used to doing full days, eating a school dinner, doing lots of things independently such as going to the loo and just being away from me. I felt I would be failing as a mother if I didn’t prepare him for reception. He has just started reception in the same school as the preschool and he was very worried about going to school but he has coped well and enjoys it apart from the exhaustion.

We weren't planning to use pre-school but when we visited schools before starting reception we heard what @Mammyloveswine said above so we sent her a couple of mornings a week from January onwards. She enjoyed it and I think it helped prepare her for the expectations of school.

I think there’s a reason all children at that age are offered 15 hours TTO, it’s because it’s really valuable for them to attend. I’m a SAHM but they learn a lot about interacting with their peers by going.

It's fine. One of mine was home ed and entered school in year 3. They were indistinguishable after the first week.

I assume you're eating off plates and not weeing on the carpet at home? They'll be adequately socialised, don't worry.

My sons just starting 15 hours a week. I'm a SAHM too and didn't really have any intention of sending him until he hit 3 and I realised he needed something more than me. He absolutely loves it and asks to go at the weekend too!

Why do you feel you need to spend more time with her? Is she not enjoying it or settling or are you at a loose end and want to do it for you?

@lannistunut

It's fine. One of mine was home ed and entered school in year 3. They were indistinguishable after the first week.

I assume you're eating off plates and not weeing on the carpet at home? They'll be adequately socialised, don't worry.

I think theres a bit more to it than 'eating off plates' and 'not weeing on the floor'

@Letsallscreamatthesistene

Do you take everything absolutely literally?

I didn't find it a struggle to teach a 3yo the alphabet in addition to using cutlery.

We socialised with lots of other kids too.

Amazing!

[quote lannistunut]@Letsallscreamatthesistene

Do you take everything absolutely literally?

I didn't find it a struggle to teach a 3yo the alphabet in addition to using cutlery.

We socialised with lots of other kids too.

Amazing![/quote]
Do you reduce everything to its most basic level, therefore making your argument pointless?

We use our 15 hours and pay a bit to send DS 2.5 days a week. It's the best - we've got a baby too so I get to do things with her but I also get loads of things done round the house that are hard with a 3.5 yo around.

He loves it and has learnt loads, there's no way I'd be able to do the activities they do and not all of the play group's have reopened post Covid so there's less options for socialisation. You get very little free from the government (though it's not completely free!) so I'm definitely for grabbing what you can.