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Original poster

Would you leave a 5yo in a car alone?

27 replies

Ellerehj · 10/09/2021 20:37

My ex partner left my 5yo DS in the car alone while he went into a shop (for Non essentials I might add) Long enough that he was crying when he returned and DS has mentioned it to me a few times and it seems it upset him. He doesn't have a great concept of time but he said he think his dad was gone around 20 minutes.
Do you think this is okay? I was completely outraged. Am I right to feel this way?

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ToffeeForEveryone · 10/09/2021 20:38

Totally unacceptable.

Brollypackedforscottishholiday · 10/09/2021 20:38

Yanbu. Imagine if ds had gone looking for his df...

1990b · 10/09/2021 20:41

Completely unacceptable. Anything could have happened including the police finding your son alone, the car could have caught fire ( yes, this actually happened to someone who left their child alone in a car)

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CyclingIsNotOuting · 10/09/2021 20:42

A 5yr old? Not at all.
I won’t even leave mine in the car to pay for patrol. I can’t lock the door when she’s inside because of the alarm and I wouldn’t leave her in an unlocked car.

MrsSkylerWhite · 10/09/2021 20:42

Big, fat no.

RossIsTheBestFriend · 10/09/2021 20:44

I’d be absolutely furious 😓 Anything could have happened!

Sprogonthetyne · 10/09/2021 20:47

20 minutes is way to long in my opinion. I'd leave my 5yo in the car on the drive if I had to go back in for a bag, or while I pay for petrol or get parking tickets etc. but never longer then a few minutes.

jeannie46 · 10/09/2021 20:48

What was he thinking? - totally irresponsible. I would be querying whether he should be having him if this is his idea of care.

Sexnotgender · 10/09/2021 20:49

That’s awful 🙁 no I wouldn’t, that’s some epically shit parenting.

INeedNewShoes · 10/09/2021 21:04

No way. If it was anything longer than the time it takes to nip into the garage shop to pay for petrol then it's in no way acceptable (also - when you go in to pay for petrol you can generally see the car from the queue!).

lannistunut · 10/09/2021 21:06

That is awful and clearly your DS was genuinely upset and scared.

I would be pretty livid. I have no idea what I would do about it but I would be very very angry.

User5827372728 · 10/09/2021 21:07

I leave my 4 year old in the car if I can see the car from the shop, like paying for petrol

MichelleScarn · 10/09/2021 21:11

Absolutely not on, what's so bloody important he didn't take them.

Sunshineonarainydayy · 10/09/2021 21:13

Completely unnecessary

scully29 · 10/09/2021 21:13

No, theres some horrendous stories & you tube videos on this. Its not ok

HungryHippo11 · 10/09/2021 21:13

I leave my 4 year old in the car to go and pay for petrol or buy bread from the petrol station. She is more likely to get hit by a car crossing the forecourt, than the car catching fire in the 3 minutes that I'm not there.

If your husband actually was 20 minutes and the car was out of sight, then he was unreasonable. But 5 year olds, as you say, have very little idea of time passing.

Galaxyinmypocket · 10/09/2021 21:15

Not for that length of time. Maybe if I was going to a cash point or petrol station and the child could see me the whole time

Queenfreak · 10/09/2021 21:15

If I can see her the whole time then I leave my 4.5 year old in the car to pay for petrol. Otherwise she comes with me.
That's it.

LST · 10/09/2021 21:16

Have you spoken to your ex dp? Was it 20 mins?

Jenala · 10/09/2021 21:25

I leave my 6yo and 4yo in the car if nipping into the petrol station, and sometimes if getting one thing from a shop where I can see through the window. I lock the car with the internal alarm sensor off though. However I think 20 minutes is way too long, and I wouldn't go into a supermarket or large shop where I'm physically far away or can't see. I would say that my 6yo would say I'd been half an hour if I was 2 minutes so you need to talk to your partner about the actual circumstances.

Original poster
Ellerehj · 10/09/2021 22:13

Thanks! He went into a garden centre of all places so not a necessity at all! I was so upset and looked into how I could get full custody of my son if this is his idea of parenting. But I don't think it's enough in the eyes of the law to stop him seeing him. I tried to reason with him but he thinks I'm over reacting

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Original poster
Ellerehj · 10/09/2021 22:14

@LST

Have you spoken to your ex dp? Was it 20 mins?
I asked him how long it was and his reply was that he left him for 'too long' vague as always very frustrating
OP posts:
Boomkin · 10/09/2021 22:17

If police or social services had seen this happen there would have been an investigation. Absolutely shocking.

LST · 10/09/2021 22:20

Ellerehj wow! At least he realises he did wrong. Your poor DS.

Mammyloveswine · 10/09/2021 22:24

Never ever..