I feel that there is something not quite right with ds

[summersflowers]

Ds is seven months old. When I had him, I knew I wanted to breastfeed. But when I tried to feed him he struggled to latch. We had an absolutely awful night in hospital with him latching, then falling off the breast, getting frustrated …

When he was weighed at day 4 he’d lost 12% of his birth weight and he was put on a feeding plan which obviously pretty much signalled the end of breastfeeding, although I didn’t want to give up. I thought it might be a tongue tie so found someone private to snip it but it made no difference - he just couldn’t latch on.

Eventually I gave up. But for months he could only tolerate tiny amounts in bottles. At four and a half months he was still having the same size he had as a newborn and he just couldn’t manage any more. Even then he’d throw up a lot.

The HV weighed him at 5.5 months and unsurprisingly he’d dropped a centile. He still can’t have more than 5oz at a time. She recommended starting to wean him. And just as with the breastfeeding, it isn’t happening. People say cheerily things like ‘oh my baby was the same … have you tried giving him bits of toast he can hold?’ They don’t seem to understand he eats nothing. Give him a bit of toast and he holds it then drops it and shows no interest in picking it up again. If I try to spoon feed him he clamps his lips shut.

Daytime naps are fine but night time is awful. He wakes and refuses to go back to sleep. He’ll fall asleep on me and then refuse to go back in his cot. Last night he screamed hysterically even though I was with him holding his hand. Again most babies I know are doing longer stints by now.

It just doesn’t seem quite right to me. He’s a lovely baby. But something isn’t right.

The reflux may still be the key here, even if he isn't being sick. The pain may still be there even if he's managing to keep milk down - and therefore he has an aversion to trying anything that may increase the pain (although his brain may not be processing it that way).

My first had silent reflux and it was grim. We did manage to start him on solids but it was hard work and he was quite skeptical. Then he had a bad bout of croup at 9/10 months and he stopped eating anything except milk. For ages. Apparently food aversions/phobias are quite common in kids with reflux or other conditions that might be causing them pain when they eat.

We had to back right off and it was SO HARD when everyone else's babies were munching away and mine would only do milk. And then milk and yoghurt. But by continuing to push it I think it made his aversion worse and he dug his tiny heels in more. For a long time he truly did have a phobia about foods, or foods that he didn't see as ok.

People really don't get it when you have a child who just won't eat at all - and when they're older, when you have a kid who would go very very hungry before they would eat a food that they are terrified of. It's a really tough road to go down but I promise there is light at the end of the tunnel. DS1 is now 9, tallest in his class, manager's player of the season in his football club, and his diet is reasonably varied and he's very open to trying new foods. Still won't eat bloody cheese which is annoying.

Someone else mentioned Carobel for reflux, I looked into using it when my baby had colic/mild reflux in the early months. You can order it in from Boots. I think you need to get the pharmacy to do it for you. It's something like "Cow & Gate Instant Carobel" and you add it to the milk to thicken it. You may need to change the teats on your bottles, otherwise it may not flow out.

This is it, you need to click on "I'm a healthcare professional" to see it. I would get advice from your GP/HV/consultant to check it is ok:
www.nutricia.co.uk/hcp/pim-products/cow-gate-instant-carobel.html

Not sure if it helps but my daughter had a posterior and anterior tounge tie still couldn't latch on the breast even after being cut same with my sisters baby. She is now 7 months and drinks anything from 4-7 ounces per feed doesn't really eat much just messes about with it I don't think they are actually supposed to eat much at 7 months my son certainly didn't until about 11 months I do remember being really stressed about this first time round.

You need to be prepared to make yourself a pain in the backside.Something isn't quite right with your DC;the lack of food intake and developmental delays are red flags.

Go to the GP;your DC needs to be referred to a peadiatrician.Don't let people fob you off.

Do you have anxiety around his food and him eating?

My nephew was fussy with weaning and is 3 nearly 4 now and still terrible with food.

Some babies will take to it, some won't. Try not to compare as I know it is easy too.

My baby was not very food focused and weaning didn't happened until 10 months. She greatly improved after. She had many awful ear infections and really didn't thrive.

Keep asking to see a paediatrician. Someone I know had these issues it turned out to be a serious issue with the part of the brain triggering hunger. If she hasn't pushed for help her daughter would've starved herself! She is a strapping 12yo at the moment by the way. Trust your instincts x

@summersflowers -I am really, really concerned about your baby. I know how impossible it is to see a GP, which is why I suggested A&E. They take things with babies more seriously there. I can tell you are deeply concerned about your baby too. There are lots of reasons why babies won’t eat, reflux is only one of them. Some include stomach, intestine or bowel deformities, food allergies, etc. (Sometimes they are combinations.) The longer your child is malnourished, the less energy they have to grow and meet milestones, which you know about. This has been going on too long.

I posted above but have a bit more time now.
You can ask for a referral to SALT for food aversion. My HV referred us, but my dd2 ate a baby crisp at 10 months and we had upwards progress from then. I'm sure mine had severe aversion to food, possibly from being given antibiotics as a baby. Hv suggested smearing puree on a teether / toy etc. Didn't work for us, but worth a try.
Eventually after the baby wotsits she progressed to segments of satsumas.
You can imagine my fear. ... an underweight baby, looking very skinny by this point. Unlike yours should would only bf (,no cup or bottle). And I was going back to work when she was 11 months!
But she went to nursery and didn't starve.
Her underlying ear infection was a problem until she was 3. We had hospital admissions and long term treatment before this was fixed. I'm sure it wasn't helping with the night time screaming and general issues with food. Thankfully as she got older at least she could tell me. It was heartbreaking though.

My older daughter had reflux and projectile vomiting that she didn't grow out of until 2. I should have pushed for more tests for that one.
She also lost weight and failed to thrive. Loads of allergies, but none seem to be food related.

They are such a worry

Again, what are his nappies like? How many wet/spiked nappies does he have in a day?