Tell me all the good things about having 2 boys

[Panda368]

Just that really.

Found out no 2 is a boy and we 100% wont be having a 3rd.

I'm surprised at how gutted I feel not for any of the girly girl things but just because I am.
Obviously whatever my feelings are I feel this way and don't particularly want to I hadn't realised I actually had a strong preference until they told us at the scan.

I had a tough time bonding with boy no 1 after a tough experience through pregnancy, birth and PND and a big part of me is worried about it now being a 'do-over' where just because it is a boy everything will happen in exactly the same way - I know this is not rational.

my 2.5 year old is great, hilarious and totally mad and I want to feel a bit excited about no2.
So tell me about brothers. I'm going to be surrounded by tractors, diggers and dinosaurs forever but what else?

I had 5 boys then a girl then another boy.
I love it.
What exactly do you want to know?

I have three boys, they're fantastic.

Try not to focus so much on the sex of your child, each child, regardless of their sex, is different. All three of mine are different in many ways. You can still do lots of fun things with boys. It's not always football and chaos.

Like yourself, I had a tough time with my first, and did view the second as a do-over when pregnant. The second time was easier, I knew what I was doing and I was more relaxed. Hopefully it'll be the same for you.

Their relationship- they share similar interests and humour

I have 2 boys. They are ace.

As small children I was surrounded by cars, trains, dinosaurs, diggers, dolls, play food, pink things, blue things. Their "babies" had so many "birthdays" they are probably older than me. We painted nails and played with make up.

They are teens now. I am surrounded by Harry Potter, Disney, Unicorns, star wars, lego.

Don't limit them to "boy" things before they are even born.

They've done Judo, Cubs, boys brigade, dance classes. (Dance was their longest running hobby)

One of them has waist length hair. He sometimes let's me plait it.

My boys are so, so different. But they have an amazing bond, they love each other. They are very affectionate & protective, it’s a joy to see.
They argue like crazy but don’t all siblings 🤷‍♀️
Congratulations

Cuddles! My boys are teenagers and still love a cuddle - they're both taller than me now so it's lovely to be hugged by them. My friends with girls definitely agree that boys are cuddlers for longer

I have 4 boys. They're great. What is it that you think you'll miss out on by not having a daughter?

I admitted to myself that I was sad I wasn't going to be braiding hair and buying cute little dresses. I got over it by buying dresses for myself. And noticing several friends' daughters, who have no interest in sitting still to have their hair braided. There are no guarantees that any child is going to be any particular way.

I think most people worry that they won't love their 2nd child as much as the first, regardless of whether it's a boy or a girl. And most of them laugh about it afterwards.

Absolutely the best time of my life was watching my two boys together when they were little. You lucky thing

I actually really identify this as I was gutted to have to acknowledge I would never have a daughter - those feelings are quite separate from how I felt about having a second son and I think if you can separate them out, it’s healthy to. You are allowed to have more than one feeling at a time.

Mine are 4.5 years apart. I have been surprised by how much fun it’s been and how different they are. Our second has absolutely completed our family despite being something of a surprise.

The bond they have is lovely to see and I think there’s something special about the relationship you have with a same-sex sibling (I have siblings of both sexes myself).

You can hand everything down! Clothes, toys…has saved us a fortune in clothes.

I had a rough time with both pregnancies but a much better birth second time round ans it was overall very healing. Everything from feeding to weaning went more smoothly (apart from sleeping but I’ll gloss over that.)

Weirdly I think when I was growing up everyone I knew there was always a girl and a boy. Other than a set of twin boys in my friendship groups growing up everyone had a sibling of opposite sex.

So I think part of it is just a vague shock as in some part of my head I clearly thought "well this one is a boy so no 2 = girl". Obviously I know things don't work like that but in some part of my brain clearly it did!

Then I think I wanted a girl because

1. we already had a name (my grandmas) (boys names are hard)
2. I wanted to teach her to swim/surf/ride a bike/ take her climbing (obvs I can do this with a boy this is just what my parents did with me)
3. I suppose a bit of that mum/daughter relationship as they get older. Obviously not guaranteed but i suppose it's different to the mum/son relationship.
4. The family is flooded with boys, currently there is a mini wolfpack of 4 boy cousins who are all under 4 together (now there will be 5) so a change might have been nice.

Obviously I can do all things with boys but it was just like a little bubble of a potential future that I'd not really ever considered not happening just popped in front of me.

I love the sound of a mini wolfpack! Your lovely new DS will have a brother and cousins to play with, fantastic.

I have two boys! A 3.5 year old and a 7 month old. They already adore each other and it's gorgeous to watch (every chance would be the same if I'd had a girl though to be fair.)

I felt all the things you were feeling. Less worried about missing out on raising a girl but more that I prefer the company of adult women and how will our relationship look when they are grown men/how involved will I be when they have children etc (don't want to be the MiL that gets the boundaries wrong etc.) But they are all fears which aren't grounded in reality. I can't predict the future. They are people at the end of the day and you can't make any assumptions on what they will be like (not saying you are).

It's going to be fab! Enjoy the chaos x

Oh and I had PND with my first so I understand totally. DS2 is like a different baby though (totally opposite temperament etc) so it definitely wasn't a round two type situation. My experience of parenting this time is very different.

Agree with other people, don't assume life with be tractors diggers and dinosaurs. My two boys are not boisterous or loud or active. I love watching films so we watch a lot of films with my boys which is nice. My eldest loves fashion and clothes which is nice, youngest loves animals and Lego, again which I love. They both love cooking.

Boys are amazing and no longer need to be constrained by stereotypes

My 1st is a total stereotype and was described by nursery when they moved him into the toddler room early as a bulldozer. He crawled at 5months and now runs everywhere with a tractor in hand, and he has 0 fear or sense of self preservation.

I definitely know that there is every chance no2 won’t be the same and I don’t encourage the stereotype but that’s how no1’s turned out so far.

There is also every chance a girl could have turned out loving pink, frills and Disney which is everything I would hate about having a girl as I was a total natural tomboy.

I think @MyCatWouldChaseYourCat summed it up pretty well - It is not that I am sad this one is a boy, he will be loved no matter what.

What I am feeling is a sense of loss that I will now never have a girl and all the different experience that goes with that.

I have two boys 18 and 16, and for us, having two of the same gender has been absolutely the best outcome.
For me, I might have liked a girl at one point, but for them, having a brother has worked out brilliantly.

I would love another boy! Sadly I won’t be able to have a second child. My friend has a lovely boy of 14 who is well into his ballroom dancing and piano. I don’t think you can assume in advance what your child will be like.

I have 3 boys. The best bit is the relationship between them, they are different but all get on great and generally have liked the same things so have a lot in common. Handing down clothes appealed to my inner skinflint!

I have two children who happen to both be the same sex. They are fabulous, very different to each other, love singing, dancing, dressing up, creative, outgoing, and love trains/diggers as well. They are best buds and often spontaneously cuddle each other. They are 2.5 and 4.5

Sex is irrelevant

My friends with girls definitely agree that boys are cuddlers for longer

My teen girl is still very affectionate.

friends of ours have 5 girls and a boy.
it's carnage. 🤣

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba I think 6 of anything would be carnage!

Even our cat is a boy. I will just have to settle on getting a female kitten at some point so I’m not so outnumbered and get on with it.

My two boys are 5 and 2 and they could not be more different. The older one has never shown interest in sports, the younger one has been football/balls in general mad since before he could walk. They don’t look alike, and their personalities are also completely different. It really doesn’t matter, they are children, not their sex.

Love the mini wolf pack analogy!
I have two boys too. First as you difficult everything ! But then second came along and they are two different people completely. I was never surrounded by dinosaurs and diggers at all (don't think we have a dinosaur toy in the house and we needed one actually for home schooling earlier this year!) My two are into different things but they like footie. Also same ish age gap too. They fight but get along too . I am very close to my mum we used to shop together and speak or see each other every day so wanted that bond with a girl but my youngest one and I share a similar bond I think (who knows when he grows up! He's 5) but I think I'm also not having a third and also who's to say a third would be a girl??? Embrace it all and I'm very happy regardless x

Good things about having a boy.

From a practical point of view, you can pass the clothes, toys etc down!

I have two boys and love it. They’ve always played together growing up, and now as young adults, have developed a new, grown-up bond. In many ways it’s easier, because they’ll have similar interests. They’ll both enjoy going to football, car shows etc, rather than wanting to do different things. Makes life easier.

( sorry for any stereotyping, I know girls can enjoy football, but even in the modern times, boys naturally veer towards cars, and girls to pink).