9 year old not using cuterly

[Fibrosucks00]

I'm concerned, my very nearly 9 year old won't use his knife and fork. Makes a mess every where. Won't sit down properly at the table. Shovels down food like I won't feed him again.
Constantly hoovering after him as our toddler has severe food allergies and goes and picks the food off the floor and eats it.

Pees all round the toliet floor and seat, doesn't clean it up.

Has a bit of an attitude when he doesn't want to go to bed. He's becoming a teenager already.

Otherwise he is a lovely boy.

What should I do? I'm getting seriously frustrated!

What should I do?

What are you doing at the moment?

What has your GP advised when you've raised these issues?

If he’s otherwise a lovely boy tell him to sit down and eat properly. Make him clean up when he pees all over the toilet. How have you gotten to nine years old without tackling this?

Making him tidy up his pee afterwards and his mess so he can understand but it's not working.
Constantly telling him to use his cuterly but he refuses, my toddler uses the cuterly though!
Tell him to sit properly on the chair.

Am I doing something wrong?

I have been

Did he have these skills and has now regressed or did he never master these things in the first place?

@Geamhradh how would the gp be intrested in this?

I personally think its lazyness! He used to do these things. He was fine whenb his friend came round for tea

@Geamhradh

What has your GP advised when you've raised these issues?

Yes, this. If you haven’t taken him, book an appointment ASAP.

What will the GP do? What will he be looking for? He can use lego etc fine.

[quote Fibrosucks00]@Geamhradh how would the gp be intrested in this?[/quote]
To rule out things like dyspraxia I imagine.

Oh possibly, he puts his tshirt on backwards

@Fibrosucks00

What will the GP do? What will he be looking for? He can use lego etc fine.

Because at his age not being able to use cutlery and not going to the toilet when he needs to are things that need investigation.

@ghe can go to the toliet fine, and he can use his cuterly he just chosses not to

@Geamhradh sorry I couldn't see what I was writing then.

He can use the toliet he's just being messy. He can use cuterly fine just chooses not too.
His dad doesn't have these problems

Put your foot down OP. Cutlery is non-negotiable. No tea until he uses them, literally withhold his food. Takeaway privileges, TV, Computer Games, seeing friends. He’ll soon get the message. If talking to him isn’t working, you just need to firm.

Same goes for the toilet. He pees on the floor & doesn’t clean it up, no TV today.

Maybe have a look at a ADHD symptom list to see if that fits?

Start punishing him when he doesn’t do the things he should be doing. My 12 year old would make food and not wash up after himself , I took the PlayStation away for one week when he didn’t wash up after I already told him he had to and guess what he now does the washing up after himself no problem

Make him wee sitting down. If he doesnt and makes a mess then consequences. Cutlery I'm more relaxed on - you dont need silver service levels of usage I assume but definitely the US way of just a fork for things that are really messy.

As for the shovelling food and hoovering up, has this been going on long? Is he having a growth spurt? Plenty of snacks between meals? They're growing so quickly at that age. My 8 year old seems constantly hungry too.

Give him soup for every meal...

What is he shovelling up his food with instead of cutlery ?

Does he use cutlery (not cuterly, sorry couldn't resist) at school?

He uses his hands.

He eats so much food, its hard to keep up with him! He's always been like it even as baby. He is very good at eating fruits and vegetables and he will always try something new. So I can't complain at that.

Sorry I didn't realise my spelling mistake.

Frankly if my NT 9 year old was using hands I'd be removing the plate immediately. I don't understand why you're letting him finish a meal if he uses his hands only.