When did you realise your child wasn't NT?

[PinguTheLion]

I'm starting to wonder if DC is showing signs of something, not sure what but he seems to have had a personality change recently.

He seems very anxious, whimpers a lot, does some flapping hand movements occasionally and my biggest concern is how repetitive he is, he will say the same sentence over and over again probably 10 times then say something else and repeat that and it's always the same things he repeats for example being in the car we do the same journey so he recognises things along the way and says what he has seen over and over again and will do the same every time we pass the same things.

So just wondering if this is normal behaviour for a child who is nearly 3 and also if any of this sounds familiar to anyone that has a child with additional needs?

Thank you

I'll be interested in any answers to this as well. My just over 2 year old repeats things a lot as well. He also gets upset really quickly but I think that's just normal 2 year old behaviour.

@GreenLeafTurnip oh yes he also gets upset at the smallest things, but things like falling over and hurting himself he just laughs at 🤷🏻‍♀️

Does nursery have any concerns

My concerns started about 2. Really concerned aged 2.5 and sought referral around that time. Diagnosed as autistic aged 4.

It’s fairly common for concerns to be raised aged 2-3 as the difference between ND kids and their NT peers becomes more obvious.

The two of mine that have a diagnosis both had IPPs from early on in nursery.

I have a NT child but have a close relative that isn’t NT. I could tell from about eight weeks old. Never said anything as how on earth can you? Thankfully parents and the education system really seem to be working well with the child and they are doing really well.

I know it’s not what you want to hear (I’ve been there) but the repetition is a flag for autism and the hand flapping also.

All of the behaviour you describe can be typical for some NT kids. My sons best friend used to (when about 4/5) stim in a very stereotypically autistic way but is definitely not autistic. Until they are a bit older it can be hard to tell, which is why most services only look to diagnose school aged children.

@Happycat1212 no nursery haven't said anything I have asked a few times about the hand flapping and they haven't see him do it

@Allthenumbers thank you, were your concerns at the time similar to mine?

@Allthenumbers thanks sorry just seen your other reply. What were your first steps to get your DC diagnosed?

It's hard to tell when they are so young, I wouldn't worry about these things unless nursery/school flag up concerns.

Our son hand flapped from a young age and I never thought much of it. Last year (9yr old) his teacher approached me and suggested he be assessed for asd. Then covid hit so it went on the back burner but he has now been accepted on the waiting list for assessment. He's highly intelligent but social wise he's hopeless.

Oh ok, I noticed from when my daughter was 2 (but looking back there was signs before) I took her to the drs as she didn’t speak at all, not a single word by 3 and as soon as the paediatrician saw her she said autism, dd wasn’t diagnosed till a bit later though which was my own fault as I didn’t want to rush into a diagnosis but realistically she should have been diagnosed sooner

Also the waiting list can be very long, we are now waiting for an assessment for my other child (school raised concerns, I didn’t actually pick up on them myself) we’ve been on the waiting list for 3 years.!

@PinguTheLion my main concerns were echolalia, she didn’t respond to her name, would repeat tv episodes verbatim, “read” books from memory, get very upset if we went a different route somewhere, got upset by loud sudden noises, and although she could talk she wouldn’t respond to me.

I was lucky as I found a Speech and Language drop in session at a children’s Center and hbd therapist referred us after listening to my concerns. So I was lucky as I was talking to someone who really understood autism. Other options are GP or HV but be prepared to fight abd stand your ground (go with a list of the behaviours that concern you). He may very well by NT but the diagnosis process is very long and in my opinion there is no harm getting the professional opinion.

I can see why you have concerns, though I wouldn't be overly concerned yet particularly if the nursery isn't. Is his anxiety or any of the other changes getting in the way of him doing things? You said it's a personality change, could it be something that's set it off that he maybe needs more support on or just time to move on from (thinking more the anxiousness and whimpering)?

I don't remember ages, though I know I had concerns with one of them before he was 2 and they were ignored because of his echolalia. I think with later with the other, but she had a lot of other health problems when she was little.

I have both NT and non-NT children who handflap. It's a good physical way of moving the energy of strong feelings and sometimes just feels nice. A lot of children that age are repetitive, my most repetitive child at that age is NT and my least is not, all of mine have gone through phases of being a bit hair trigger on getting upset.

@BigPlanes what were the signs you noticed in a 8 week old baby?

@Chelyanne thank you for your reply.
DC is quite sociable, he will happily say hello to people and waves at anyone he sees out of a window.
I hope you don't have to wait much longer for the assessment x

You mentioned a change in personality - did this occur after an illness? There are two conditions (PANS and PANDAS) that are often misdiagnosed but occur when a child's body has a misdirected immune response. Unfortunately many Drs don't recognise the conditions.

@Happycat1212 3 years?! 😱

My DS1 began to show autistic traits at 20 months.

He was hand flapping, toe walking, ignoring his name when called, playing alongside but not with peers, lining toys up instead of playing with them.

We were very fortunate that we were in a country where private cover is easily affordable for ordinary people, so he got to see a consultant paediatrician quickly. He saw him once and asked that we brought him back in 4 months as he was 'a little concerned' but 'not convinced'.

The behaviours continued but didn't worsen.

4 months later we re-attended. DS didn't engage well with the tests, so they were a bit inconclusive, so we were to return 4 months later; but, we were his last patient, so as we left via the reception desk. (to pay the bill!) DS has hanging onto my legs, and the doctor came out of his office and immediately started playing a peekaboo game with DS, ducking out of sight then reappearing, which DS thought was hilarious as he himself also ducked behind my legs to 'hide' and reappear.

The Dr said to me that this was the most conclusive thing he'd witnessed that DS wasn't on the spectrum!

DS1 is now 22 and is definitely not autistic. But we were very concerned he was, at 2.

It has become more apparent the longer time has gone on so as a toddler I couldn't really tell. But what might be a personality quirk at 3/4 by 6/7 is a concern and by 9/10 is a symptom

@Miljea I’m glad that happened a long time ago! My daughter most definitely is autistic and also is very adept at playing peekaboo! Thankfully understanding the autistic spectrum has come a long way although not in all professionals unfortunately.

@Allthenumbers thank you I've not heard of echolalia before. Just looked it up and it's definitely recognisable to him although he doesn't necessarily repeat phrases that we say he just repeats what he has seen e.g "there's a bus mummy, a bus, there's a bus, mummy there's a bus" not sure if that is the same as echolalia.
He can 'read' the hungry caterpillar book cover to cover, in that he knows it word for word from us reading it to him and he will go through the pages as if he is reading them.
I'm so glad you found help early on will start making some enquiries

Yes :( we was referred by school in July 2018 when he was 6... he’s now 9!