Quick question about Ferber method- need to know ASAP!

[bleachblondemom]

I’ve just got my baby to sleep using the Ferber method on the first try (hooray!). My question is... if he wakes up in say 20 mins, do I start again? Or assume that’s all the sleep he wanted? His sleep cycles can be anywhere from 30-45 mins. Do I need to go back in and use the method again to help him link to the next cycle? Does it depend on whether he seems content to wake up or is crying?

Ah MN never disappoints.

I’d rather do what you are doing OP than be those parents whose children are still co sleeping 3 years down the line and the Mum is on MN complaining of lack of sleep and no relationship with their partner.

[quote bleachblondemom]@1940s where is your child whilst you sit on mumsnet crapping all over other people?[/quote]
Weird... poo fetish?

@bleachblondemom Well they would hate me. I sleep trained both my kids by 6 months and will do with the third one too.

Not living day to day exhausted on snatches of sleep, happy, well developed sleeping children, who aren't emotionally scarred and well rounded, achieving in school, a normal sex life with my DH. No clingy kids with no routine that rule the household because you can't bear to hear a whimper. I know what I prefer

@1940s give it up love it’s just embarrassing now

Ah, the dummy popping out. Mine both did that phase and we just kept popping it back in until baby learned to put it in themselves. That was wonderful until baby started throwing it. Then we put several dummies in and only had to go in once baby had lobbed all of them. Dummies are amazing but such a hassle!

We used the Ferber method 22 years ago. Everyone I knew did but I think under 6 months is too young.

you should read the book Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems by Ferber. He doesn't just deal with controlled crying. read the whole thing before doing anything else.

I agree with whoever said you can't expect your baby to self-sooth without a dummy if he normally has one.

@pallisers I should’ve clarified, he has a dummy but not all the time. Probably about 30% of the time, just if he’s having trouble settling at bedtime even after his bottle. But the last few nights, instead of sleeping through, he’s been waking every 2 hours and needing his dummy to settle back to sleep. That’s what I’m trying to work on, him being able to self-soothe without parental intervention.

@bleachblondemom if it helps I tackled this with my middle child by using a dummy clip so even if they chucked it, it was always nearby and then putting it in her hand so she could learn to put it back herself. Obviously took time but worked a charm in the end.

Well this turned into a bitching bun fight pretty quickly!

Groups of women are like hens pecking away at each other!

Glad you got what you needed OP. I went sleepless for 3 years. I wanted to claw my own eyes out. I'm never having anther baby again. But if I had too I'd do some sleep training of some sort. DC3 nearly killed me!

@JungleIsMassive I honestly don’t know why they bother 😂 I literally said right from the start that I’m not interested in anyone’s opinions against sleep training, I just wanted my specific question answering. But some people just cannot help themselves!

Sleep is such a judgmental area of parenting. I'm the other end of the judgment spectrum with a never sleep trained breastfed 3 year old who still gets into bed with me in the middle of the night. Every. Single. Night. I still manage to function as a lawyer, enjoy my life AND the extra cuddle time but yet I get judged for my sleep choices by the sounds of some other posters!

But I know what's right for my family as I'm sure you know what is right for yours OP.

@sittingonacornflake and I would never pass judgement on that, you have done what you feel is right for you as a parent and for your child. I have no right whatsoever to criticise you for it, and i would expect the same towards me but as we’ve seen her, some people just can’t read something they disagree with and simply move on.

@bleachblondemom Haha! Your last reply to some judgey fucker made me proper laugh. 😁

I'm 50 now and my boys are all late teens/20. Clever, fit, popular young men who have been the usual hard work but lovely. I am sure babyhood and primary years were the easiest years for me due to them sleeping so bloody well from early on. Plus I was able to maintain a great relationship with DH once we had shared the bedtime routine together. Me and him eating together and watching tv when kids were in bed warm and happy and content, from 7pm or whatever was so important. (Apologies if you are single and that's irrelevant)

Good luck with it all. There will always be those sleep deprived martyrs who will think you akin to Rose West in wickedness but just ignore them and be happy doing what's best for you and your baby.

@BigusBumus thank you 😄

[quote bleachblondemom]@1940s give it up love it’s just embarrassing now[/quote]
😂😂