At the end of my tether with fussy eating 7yo

[Misty9]

Does anyone else who has a very fussy eater have any meal ideas? I'm at the end of my tether with dd, 7, and the school holidays mean it's more of an issue as normally I just let school feed her (or not) and do a packed lunch tea.

Before anyone says have you tried xyz, she loves cooking and preparing meals, but then won't eat them. She's involved in choosing meals, I've tried threats, ignoring it, bribes, education. Nothing makes any difference. Her eat anything 9yo brother is becoming more fussy now, possibly her influence, and I'm ready to tear my hair out with it all.

She will eat:
Chicken nuggets, battered
Pasta
Pepperami
Cheese. Allll the cheese
Most fruit
Cucumber
Cherry tomatoes if not too squashy. Not cooked tomatoes
Risotto (but not rice)
Chips, sometimes
Burgers, sometimes
Wraps
Ham
Olives and other salty things
Pizza
Macaroni cheese (favourite meal)
Tinned carrots (no other kinds)
Bolognese and mince based things
Chicken on the bone
King prawns
Pancakes

That is it. Nothing eggy or saucy, doesn't like food touching. Obviously will eat crisps and chocolate. But not sweets. Yes, she's highly likely to be neurodiverse like her brother and dad...

Help!!

I wouldn’t say a 7 year old who eats all the above is a very fussy eater!!

I wouldn't say that sounds very fussy to me. I could cut that list down by two thirds for my DD. I WISH she would eat that much. You don need to worry OP.

That’s much better than when my fussy eater dc was 7!

@Misty9

Does anyone else who has a very fussy eater have any meal ideas? I'm at the end of my tether with dd, 7, and the school holidays mean it's more of an issue as normally I just let school feed her (or not) and do a packed lunch tea.

Before anyone says have you tried xyz, she loves cooking and preparing meals, but then won't eat them. She's involved in choosing meals, I've tried threats, ignoring it, bribes, education. Nothing makes any difference. Her eat anything 9yo brother is becoming more fussy now, possibly her influence, and I'm ready to tear my hair out with it all.

She will eat:
Chicken nuggets, battered
Pasta
Pepperami
Cheese. Allll the cheese
Most fruit
Cucumber
Cherry tomatoes if not too squashy. Not cooked tomatoes
Risotto (but not rice)
Chips, sometimes
Burgers, sometimes
Wraps
Ham
Olives and other salty things
Pizza
Macaroni cheese (favourite meal)
Tinned carrots (no other kinds)
Bolognese and mince based things
Chicken on the bone
King prawns
Pancakes

That is it. Nothing eggy or saucy, doesn't like food touching. Obviously will eat crisps and chocolate. But not sweets. Yes, she's highly likely to be neurodiverse like her brother and dad...

Help!!

Your child is not a fussy eater at all. I wish mine would eat half that stuff.

That's loads. I really wouldn't worry. The list of foods almost 7 yo DS eats is about a third of that. No fruit for a start unless it's dried fruit or bananas in banana bread / pancakes. No veg either unless hidden in sauces.

My DD survives on cheese spread sandwiches and pasta. Occasionally sausages. Most fruits but never the same fruit each week.
The advice I was given was to never make a big deal of it. I’ve given up fighting each meal time. I make what she likes, I have what I like, she’s welcome to try my food and there’s always fruit/yoghurt/snacks available should she ever wish to branch out from the cheese spread. She never has but the choice is there.

That's not too bad.
My DD has probably a similar length list to be honest. She won't eat anything in a sauce, prefers food not to touch, no condiments, etc, you know the drill!
I more or less just feed her what she likes. She's healthy and a good weight.

That's fine! Choose your battles, I'm not sure this needs to be one!

I would love my 7 year old to eat
all that. You are doing a great job. Don't worry.

She won't eat any veg. I know it's a decent list, but what on earth do I cook the 3 of us from that?! Meal planning is the bane of my life...

Ds won't eat bolognese or macaroni cheese. And I have a ton of dietary restrictions 😭

I would just cook what you were going to cook for all of you, and put a little on her plate, not touching, but alongside the things she will eat. Then she can eat it or not! Will she drink smoothies? That'd be a way to get some vitamins in her.

As another person with a very fussy child (only vegetable she'll eat is broccoli, no sauces at all), either we have a meal which she can eat bits from, or I prepare something really simple (e.g. chicken nuggets, broccoli, plain pasta) alongside our more interesting meal. I let her eat food she likes, but in a moderately balanced way, so either a banana or broccoli with every meal, some complex carbs and some protein. She's healthy, and a normal weight, and I don't want a constant fight over food.

Many of the rest of you are making me feel much better about the very limited range DD will eat....

I definitely don't make it a battle and never have. I just reeally struggle with what to actually feed us all, without making 3 different meals. She won't let anything on her plate that she doesn't like. It doesn't help that a lot of my staple meals have now been refused, often by both of them. It would also be easier if I was cooking for two adults, separately to the dc, but I find it quite difficult to cook for one. Basically, food is not a source of pleasure for me

If she likes cooking how about one day she cooks whatever meal you're having and you cook hers, then vice versa. That way you are only cooking one meal and she cooks the other. If she refuses to do that every day point out that you have to do 2 every day, so either she does 1 or she eats what you have. Or starve.

That doesn't seem terribly fussy - at 7, my now 16yo DD would eat plain pasta, plain rice, carrots (absolutely no other veg) plain chicken, white bread, some breakfast cereals, ham and cheese. Oh, and bananas but she wasn't allowed those as she had tummy problems. No sauces. No potatoes of any kind. No fruit. Nothing on her plate could touch. We couldn't eat in restaurants for years...
She's much better now, so there is light at the end of the tunnel! I coped by never making a fuss. I'd put a meal in front of her, things she ate and one or two that she didn't, and she either ate or she didn't. She survived, and so did I! 💐

@makesIlaugh

If she likes cooking how about one day she cooks whatever meal you're having and you cook hers, then vice versa. That way you are only cooking one meal and she cooks the other. If she refuses to do that every day point out that you have to do 2 every day, so either she does 1 or she eats what you have. Or starve.

She cooks a mean risotto! But even I cdant cope with that every day (and ds tries to refuse it often )

Bathorshower
Yep. That's what we do. Either a meal that we can all eat (very few of those!) Or I just rustle up something simple alongside. I batch cook the one pasta sauce she will eat. Freeze in portions. Baked salmon is liked. Noodles/plain rice/boiled potatoes/chips/pasta are all acceptable. She doesn't like much meat, but will eat chicken (no bones) Quorn type things, veggie sausages (but only one brand)
There are also rules about when things can be eaten - like eggs are acceptable in omelette. But can only be eaten in the evening

Okay, different question - what meals do you feed your fussy eaters? Because most of the ones mentioned so far she wouldn't touch!

In my experience you have to go with it.

Practical advice - cook for the kids one day, you the next (so only cooking once each day) and make double so it does 2 nights. Then you can cater to yours and DDs needs without double the work.

Well from your list there’s loads of options..!! And a fruit salad for pudding!

At one point I gave my 6yo the recipe books and told her I needed 7 lunches and 7 dinners she would eat without making a fuss. I can't say it worked perfectly but it did reduce my stress levels a bit.

Agree with @BasinHaircut I think you just have to roll with it. I used to try and plan our meals around what DD would eat, we have an older DD too, and her list of meals was just getting smaller and smaller so we were all missing out. I cook a variety of meals and she either picks at it or she doesn't. I'll offer a banana or toast at bedtime if she really has eaten nothing.

I only wish my 10 year old DD would eat half of your list OP.

@Thelovelyflower

At one point I gave my 6yo the recipe books and told her I needed 7 lunches and 7 dinners she would eat without making a fuss. I can't say it worked perfectly but it did reduce my stress levels a bit.

I know their dad tries this occasionally. Dd chooses things, then won't eat them...