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Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

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Original poster

10 Year old started her periods and is back to school tomorrow

36 replies

Getmebacktowork88 · 07/03/2021 21:48

Hi all,
First time poster here.
This is my daughters second period but I'm so anxious with her being back at school tomorrow.
Shes only year 5.
She's not readily wanting to talk about them.
I feel I should speak to school and let them know that its happened in case of any accidents and also to have separate toilet time to change etc but my daughter doesn't want me too.
I just wonder what others would do?
TIA

OP posts:

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doctorhamster · 07/03/2021 21:50

Speak to the school op. You need to find out if the toilets she has access to at school have sanitary bins for a start. She won't be the only year 5 who's started.

StealthRoast · 07/03/2021 21:57

Hi op, I would definitely speak to the school. My dd is 10 and in year 5 too and she started her periods last year in year 4 when she had just turned 9, she was dreading PE and she had her first male teacher at the time who is in his twenties and didn’t want me to tell him so I spoke to the female HT and she informed the female TA in dd’s Class and they were so lovely about it. We then went into lockdown so she’s got used to it since.

Her best friend started recently and is a bit worried but their school has notices up in the girls loos which say that if they need anything at all period related then just ask for the “red box” at the office which obviously doesn’t cause too much embarrassment for anyone and I presume this is a box of supplies for the girls.
She definitely won’t be the only one.

My dd has a pencil case that has spare knickers, wipes and pads in it.

Original poster

Getmebacktowork88 · 07/03/2021 21:59

I thought this exact same thing with sanitary bins. My husband thinks we should mention it to the school. I just worry that, after her finally opening up a bit about it all (she tried hiding her first one) that we could end up taking a step back with her being so young

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Pandemicpregnancy · 07/03/2021 22:00

I would definitely speak to the school. I started my periods when I was 10 and remember being mortified because the year 6 toilets didn't have any sanitary bins in so I had to sneak into the year 7 toilets instead.

GrumpyHoonMain · 07/03/2021 22:12

Call the reception tomorrow and ask if they have them in the girls toilets. They’ll be happy to check. I’d also prepare your DD with a kit just in case they haven’t - a small ziplock bag she fit in her pocket. She can the sneak it into an outside bin

doadeer · 07/03/2021 22:14

I would also look at period pants, God I wish I'd had them at 11 rather than noisy sanitary towels.

Lougle · 07/03/2021 22:17

Can I suggest Modibodi pants? They are pricey (£19 each) but one pair of pants would probably last the whole school day. DD2 (13) won't use the toilets at school at all and Modibodis have been an absolute God send.

stardust40 · 07/03/2021 22:27

Agree with previous poster... modbodi pants have been a gamechanger for dd13. She can wear them all day with no need for pads at all and no risk of leaks. They are very expensive but we started with a couple of pairs and I've added an extra each month!

cheeseisthebest · 07/03/2021 22:28

Where can you buy modbodis?

MuddyWalks · 07/03/2021 22:30

@cheeseisthebest

Where can you buy modbodis?

Internet

RosesAndHellebores · 07/03/2021 22:36

Oh I remember this op. DD was 10 years and five months and whilst not surprised it seemed so early. I did make an apt. to see the HT who was incredibly understanding and said the teachers' lives would be so much easier if all parents talked to her (dd had a male form teacher). The girls were allowed to use the teachers' toilets which had spares and spare pants if necessary and there was a code word.for the TA or form teacher so they could slip away outside of break times. Would never have known if I hadn't spoken of it.

IdblowJonSnow · 07/03/2021 22:36

I would respect her privacy and NOT tell school. I wouldn't have forgiven my parents if they'd broken my trust.

That said she is very young and I can see why you're worried. Why not equip her tomorrow as much as possible and see how she gets on?

icegarden · 07/03/2021 22:38

I've bought my 11yr old some period pants ready in case. Different make but ill buy more when she starts and I know size to buy more expensive ones. As far as I know none of her Yr6 class have started yet but we are all ready

Tickly · 07/03/2021 22:41

@cheeseisthebest it's modibodi (just was missing the first i if you're googling!). I agree they're brilliant

CurrentWife · 07/03/2021 23:02

FYI I work in a primary school and we have sanitary bins for Y4 upwards.

Original poster

Getmebacktowork88 · 07/03/2021 23:49

I have bought her 'period pants'. £19 for 5 pairs. Can you believe? 😂.
I'm still in 2 minds, I really want to mention it to school but like I previous poster, I fell awful betraying her trust.

OP posts:

Original poster

Getmebacktowork88 · 07/03/2021 23:51

Just seen the modibodi post.
I'll look into them.
The ones we got are thicker pants but still need to wear pads with them.

OP posts:

Cavagirl · 07/03/2021 23:54

I was your daughter OP.
I'd have been mortified if my mum had gone behind my back and talked to the school. If she's told you not to, please respect that.
Let her manage it in her own way. It will be tricky if there's no bins but she'll be fine and it's so important for her to have you as an ally she can trust. Maybe talk through some worst case scenarios with her & what she'd do just in case.

Rainbowqueeen · 07/03/2021 23:59

There’s other brands of period pants other than midi bod I if you google period pants

Original poster

Getmebacktowork88 · 07/03/2021 23:59

Thankyou for this. I also think she would be upset if I went behind her back with it but my husband thinks the school needs to know.
I just worry about accidents.
Like I previously posted, I've got her thicker pants and still get her to wear a pad.
At the moment she doesn't need to change for people at school either to covid

OP posts:

Original poster

Getmebacktowork88 · 08/03/2021 00:02

Thankyou for all your advice. I'm still undecided but I really like reading everyones views and peoples situations.
To me it seems so young but after reading your replies I feel more at ease that its more normal than I thought

OP posts:

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 08/03/2021 00:12

I would have a quiet word at school. If the girls have had a puberty talk already, then it's an opportunity to remind them where the bins are, and if caught out how to ask for the red box or whatever the process is.

DDs (Yr6) school has compulsory swimming and a regulation school (speedo) swimsuit. She hasn't started yet but I'm wondering what to do about swimming lessons? She is a summer baby and quite immature both physically and mentally about this. Has anyone used the modibodi swimsuits and recommend them? She would not I think at 10.5 yrs countenance tampons.

Level32 · 08/03/2021 00:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Solidaritea · 08/03/2021 00:17

I'm a Y5/6 teacher and our girls don't tend to tell us and neither do their parents. It wouldn't change anything if they did, to be honest. Sadly, we can't prevent leaks or any embarrasment caused. Any leaks that happen, we can deal with if and when they happen.

Y5 toilets should have sanitary bins as many will have started periods. Do train her to check the cubicle before removing a towel though.

Is she having regular leaks at home during the day? It's understandable to want to tell the school, but if she's not leaking at home, she probably won't at school either.

ineedaholidaynow · 08/03/2021 00:23

I would talk to her and say that it would be useful if school know, just in case she had to nip to the loo etc. I assume in her year group they may have strict times when they can use the toilets. Most schools are having to do this due to COVID and trying to keep bubbles separate. Much easier if the teacher/TA knows so she can go out when necessary.

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